What about some of the positive effects of alcohol though?
Increased personality + social skills, reduced pain detection (ie. higher health) lol.. there's gotta be more
Those are all illusory. Try being the only sober person around a bunch of drunk people and you'll see just how much their personality and social skills improve.

Reduced pain detection, perhaps, but that does not equate to higher health. Your body still takes the same damage, you just don't realize it until later.
I'll also cast a vote against the blurry screen. I don't remember if that was standard in Oblivion or behavior added by a mod, but it annoyed me quite a bit. I don't get blurry vision when I drink in real life unless I drink
a lot.
I think the only reliable way of simulating the effects of alcohol in TES is to lower your attributes. I think the two most likely to be affected would be agility and endurance, depending on how much you drink. Personality is also a likely target.
[Edit: This is not to say, by the way, that there are no positive effects to limited alcohol consumption. But most of those effects are long-term (related to the prevention of various diseases and disorders, or related to overall psychological well-being) and would be hard to model in TES.]