Sotha Sil, where does one begin to describe a being that has attained godhood? Note, I
am fully aware of my inability to fully comprehend his persona, Im only trying to paint a
general portrait of the man, as true as possible and as closely resembling what
information my sources have granted me.
One must first understand, this I learned from Vivec before his disappearance where he
bore a sad but resolute visage, those who have attained a manner of godhood may choose
to enter a place outside of time, where they may live for centuries while in truth only
seconds had passed. Take into account what that may do to someone, total seclusion,
freedom to think with no distraction, no influence, not to mention power enough to enact
one’s every wish. Complete freedom. I believe Sotha Sil partook in this activity far more
than his companions, but I shall elaborate on that later.
I also believe he achieved that state that brings one above the common ideals of reality,
perhaps even further, but did not reach the final state. Why? My personal belief is more
speculation than anything, but I believe it to be the truth. To quote Almalexia “Once,
Sotha Sil was like we are, the Lord Vivec and I. He spent time among these mortals,
instructing them, counseling them, protecting them from harm. He may have loved them
more than any of us, though I know not why. It has been many years since any have seen
the Sorcerer, though. Many more since he took initiates into his service. I believe he grew
weary of mortal imperfections, and retired to his Clockwork City, where he reshapes life,
and some say the very world, into an image he finds pleasing.” I believe he could not
fully leave it all behind, that he did indeed love the people moreso than the other two
mortal gods and that was the reason he retired to the Clockwork City. This world, our
world, began with so much promise, tainted beyond memory to bear the failures of our
forefathers and repeat them to no end. I understand words spoken by Almalexia are to be
taken carefully, but here I do not believe she would lie, why would she do so when she
already intended on murdering the Nerevarine and wished him to murder the Tinkerer,
even though she had already murdered him several days before. There might have even
been a slight sting of guilt in the back of her lost mind…
This is how I see Sotha Sil, he loved not just the dunmer, but all. He could not bear to see
the world destroy itself, the failings of mortals, the ignorance, the irrationality, the hatred.
He had tremendous power, but even all of it would not have been enough, to stop wars
what was he to do? Force the very minds of men and mer to peace? To tamper so far with
the world was not his way, and any other way the world might not wish to hear him.
His death only supports my theories, or at least in the way that I interpret it. When the
Nerevarine materialized in the temple, Almalexia, dead, cradled in his arms (for this to
remain about Sotha Sil, I shall keep my reactions to my next entry, about the late god-
queen) we all knew there was more to it, as she wore her war-mask, she never carried it
on her and none knew its resting location. He had told us about Almalexia’s words before
she tried to enact her treachery, of how she murdered the poor mage and intended the
same for the Nerevarine. The part that haunted my mind until long after my pain of
Almalexia’s madness and demise was but a distant memory was that the Tinkerer had not
fought back, but rather watched in silence as she robbed him of his life. Not a word, not a
scream. It is of my opinion that he did indeed feel pain from the situation, but not
physical, I believe he felt pain from seeing Almalexia in her current maddened state,
another victim of mortal folly. He may have even expected it, foreseen it, whether by
simple reflection or divination is irrelevant. The crazed god-queen spoke even of killing
Vivec. Perhaps he wanted death, perhaps he thought he deserved it, as he robbed the
Heart of its power, maybe he thought he could have done more for Nirn and blamed
himself for his inability to aid its inhabitants, we may never know, all we can do is
wonder.
With all his power, his knowledge, he was powerless to stop the world from tearing itself
apart, so he sought solace elsewhere, in a world of his own making, his Clockwork City
free from guilt, pain, influence and other negative emotions. Oft people wonder where it
is located, the speculation is rampant. Were I to make an assumption, however, I would
think that it is not even located inside Mundus, he constructed it to be an escape and a
refuge, I cannot imagine he would have placed it on the very world he tried so hard to
push out of his mind. Although, he did say once that all speculation of its location were
both true and false, were we to speculate wildly, perhaps it is indeed everywhere?
Everywhere at once, so infinitely small that we cannot see it, yet from it, from everywhere,
he shapes things to a better and more prosperous future? At the same time a
metaphorical and literal place? Were it only that we had a clue, or maybe we the answer
lies there, right in front of us, buried beneath the riddles…
I had a meeting with Divayth Fyr, one of the few lucky enough to
have gained his interest and friendship. My own station afforded me a chance to see him
in person once, he was strikingly unique, with his mechanical attire and his golden mask.
I remember his eyes, the only think peeking from behind that veil, but it was enough to
see the exasperation and the guilt. He looked at me as he walked by, he lowered his eyes
quickly enough, I suspect my own mask was not one he wished to remember… I had
never paid that memory much thought until now, our conditioning was so complete, I can
hardly blame him for avoiding us. He was an infinitely interesting character, speaking
sometimes hurtful truths without noticing he may have caused harm.
Forgive me if I tend to digress ever so often, I find little details often more useful than
direct information when it comes to true understanding of a person’s mind. Returning to
Divayth, he informed me he had actually visited the metallic maze in person and told me
of its mind-boggling scope and of its mechanical inhabitants. Although he only caught
simple glimpses of it, nothing enough to draw a complete idea. One silver lining, though
was his manner around the old telvanni wizard and the other enlightened psijic students.
I felt somewhat relieved to hear of his more enthusiastic attitude, even if it was only to be
witnessed by a select few.
Finally I will end with the more unfounded rumors and speculation surrounding the great
mage. Once again a quote from Almalexia “He began to speak of the fall of the Tribunal
and the return of the Old Gods. But Sotha Sil is not a Seer; he is a Maker. He shapes the
Here and the Now, while only I have been privy to what is to come. I know this...he is no
longer the man he once was." Obviously we notice, the god-queen had no talent in
foresight, dieing only several hours after this statement. But it begs the question, why this
specifically? Was she in fact envious of her brother’s potential ability to see the future?
Her first words say he knew of the fall of the tribunal, though she uses them to mock him
they turned out eventually to be naught but truth. Azura, anticipation of Sotha Sil,
certainly proved to dabble in prophecy. Again, this is all only speculation. To end, I
suppose I will address the latest hearings of the Heart of Lorkhan, and Seht’s pact with
the daedric princes. As for what he promised the lords of oblivion, I cannot say, his soul?
The heart? Artifacts? I lean towards choosing the heart. Few knew of its existence, much
less its location, and even less would be able to track it down should it have moved.
Recent rumors in Skyrim indicated it might have been locked away in a dwemer lockbox,
before its recent re-opening. It is of one of my theories that the one to have placed it there
was Sotha Sil, safe from the schemes of the princes. Once again all of these are just the
musings of an old mer, all speculation and theories, I have others of course but I fear that
if I wrote them all down my hands would fail me. The irony is almost painful. Do with
these as you wish, I simply wanted to compile my thoughts of the man and maybe clear up
some of the mystery behind him. However I must regrettably inform that, without access
to the clockwork city and perhaps his journals, we may never discover who he truly was.
-Sincerely, an old and tired sorcerer; Arnas Therethi, ex-hand of Almalexia