Answer to first question:
Because the Creation Kit is a rather silly piece of software, by default it won't let you modify anything added or modified by an esp in any meaningful way. So your new mod is completely overwriting all of the changes made by your old mod, using vanilla values for those attributes where you haven't made edits. Which is why your new changes are showing up, but your old ones are getting overwritten. It's a dumb system, because it automatically makes any two mods altering the same cell, NPC, or object incompatible, even if their edits would be wholly compatible if merged into a single esp.
Anyways. My opinion aside, if you want to edit an esp file, turn it into an esm master file using WryeBash. Right-click on the mod you want to edit in WryeBash, and select "esmify." Skyrim and the CK will now think that it is an esm file, and it will show up at the top of the data file list along with the other master files. Load it, make edits, save your new esp, and don't forget to revert the old mod you turned into an esm back into an esp, else Skyrim will start behaving in weird ways or something.
Second question:
It might be labled as "hood" or "hat."
If that doesn't work, can try manually going through the various categories. Vanilla and official DLC clothes are listed under Items > Armor. If it's something added by a mod, make sure the appropriate esp file has been loaded.