yeah the queen's pretty chill and raz is the best NPC ever bar none he makes AD that much better. But i still hate the way the altmer treat the bosmer and khajits...T_T I wonder what altmer taste like.. ugh if its anything like their personality probably bitter.

you hit that one on the head. thats exactly why i like AD. Queen Ayrenn is awesome. she is like a female, more peaceful version of Talos.

So you need to start sweating when a Bosmer says to you, "You look absolutely delicious." or "I could just eat you all up."

definitely going to trigger a few sweat beads

I just dont care .... Valenwood or not Orsimer is off the menu. I tried orsimer once and had to spend two days at the special ditch Orc-ing at both ends.

i'm not a very big fan of Orsimer either. BUT i do really like their lore history

So many thoughts in regard to this topic... and most are Bethesda related lol...

"Two Bosmer are eating a clown who wandered into the Valenwood, and one looks up at the other and asks, 'Does this taste funny to you?'"

Normally, people think of elves as the dainty, kind of 'fairy' like people whose sixuality is as ambiguous as it gets, off frolicking in the grass and woods... and in Elder Scrolls, they are busy eating your face because you cut down a small tree to use for firewood on your long trip through their area... I can see some real horror stories. Imagine the soldiers in the stormcloaks sitting around a fire talking about the atrocities of the Thalmor camps and stuff... and then the one guy stands up, cloak falling from his side showing he only has one arm, explains he was fighting a band of Bosmer, got knocked out, and woke to find they had already ate one of his arms, managed to beat them to death with a rock, and barely escaped... or something like that...

awesome joke. hahaha

but yeah, even though Bosmer are like the nicest people ever, they gotta do what they gotta do. and that would probably bring about a lot of bad experiences for others lol. hopefully everyone is aware of the Green Pact and plan accordingly if they DO decide to wander into Valenwood

OH OH Elder scroll cannibal joke time i'll start its bad but here goes.

4 out of 5 bosmer agree the 5th needed Salt.

Bump my brother brings up a good point, maomer being sea elves they'd probably be salty already so if we were to eat them we'd probably need to partial boil them once and strain off the water to remove some of the salt before cooking further.

i am not sure how i feel about that hahahaha

would eating a Khajiit even be considered cannibalism?

You elves are something else... kinda kinky.

Kinky is what we aim for

This is why we never invade anyone we sit around all the time just thinking up new recipes for would be invaders.

yes, we dont need to conquest or invade. thats what men are for. and for keeping up our rations.

Just don't let us get hungry or its a bit like this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dY4V3UUY95A

yes, that will be exactly whats going on in Valenwood. except instead of meat in general, its just human meat lol. we have all the wildlife. just doesnt always satisfy

After eating a wandering Templar, the Bosmer child looked to his mother, "Mom Mom! It keeps coming back up!", to which the mother replied, "Well, you know what they say, it's hard to keep a good man down..."

A wood elf told a Khajit that the green pact was the only way to live, and when he went back to his friends and family, they turned on him, at which point he had no choice, and killed them all... he asked his wood elf friend what he should do now, and the Bosmer replied, "Well, first you have to swallow your pride..."

Ba dum tsh

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zXDo4dL7SU

THAT WAS AMAZING! but now i have high standards.

What does a Wood Elf call an army of Charioteers? Meals on Wheels!

Back when the Bretons were still slaves of the elves and trying to escape, the Wood Elf king was busy having dinner, when a servant ran in screaming, "Sire! The slaves are revolting!", the king replied while looking sick, "No need to tell me, I'm trying my best to keep them down as it is!"

You hear about the new Bosmer Guard Captain? Turns out he really wants to grill his suspects!

well threads like this makes me regret ever letting you guys into our dominion...it looks that all the hard work we have committed have failed to civilize your people.

HIGH ELF H8R!!! this may have been avoided if you people werent so stuck up

you are my new best friend!!