Holy underdrawers! Are we on TWELVE already??? Jeez. Some of us have way too much free time - and WAY too many words, not to mention stories to tell....

Yep. *grin*

You probably should ping Leydenne or Rohugh to close a couple of those older threads that seem to still get posts....

Already done, thanks!

Sere, I’m so glad to see a new character from you at the end of the last thread! A very sad start for her. I’m looking forward to her adventures.

Serethil...a sorrowful start to her story... waiting to see where it goes.

Grits, thanks for your comment at the end of the last thread. It was hard to end Ake's story, and I'll miss her and Kerik. It was time though, no matter how much I didn't want it to be.

Um, it may not be required, but I apologize on how short this one is. It's just....I can't. I thought that mentioning his mother was enough for me to put this aside for a while, but this?

Kris

Entry 20

I did not want to say anything to her. I did not want to leave. At least, not right away. I understood. Aranea told me long ago, and then I barely cried. Now, faced with the memory, I felt the well of tears, but no stress. No real need to do so. For it was not about sadness this time. This was not a young boy being told that his mother had died, but rather a reunion of sorts, even if I was aware it could not last that long. But even so, I wanted to remember this. To know her touch again, to never forget. That feeling where nothing can be a danger to me, for she is there.

“I honestly do not know what to say.”

She smiled at me. “You do not need to. No matter what you have done, I know your reasoning. I know why you did it. Overall, it is not about what you've done, but what your actions accomplish. No matter where you go, what you do, remember that.”

“What about...”

She sighed. “I do not want to tell you. I do not like the answer I have for you. But....you are not really a boy, not exactly. You risked everything, in a selfless bid to save others. That deserves the truth., although knowing the fate of your father is not something you should have to accomplish anything to learn. The sad truth though, is that while I know his fate, I do not know entirely. You encountered them, saw their methods. I...hate to say that I...did not reach him in time.”She held a hand to her chest.

Tsun approached, and I thought that he was about to speak with me – but it seemed that he had something else to say first, which was not to me. “Above all others, above the order of Shor, you desired to join the battle the most. It is not a cruel fate placed before you, that you could not join the fighting. Even so, you obeyed.” He smiled, turning to me.

“That was a mighty deed! The doom of Alduin encompassed at last, and cleansed is Sovngarde of his evil snare. They will sing of this battle in Shor's hall forever. But your fate lies elsewhere. When you have completed your count of days, I may welcome you again, with glad friendship, and bid you join the blessed feasting.”

I looked back to her. “He is right. I know what you feel, but...you know you cannot stay. You have years ahead of you and...”Tears welled in her eyes.”...I am sorry. I should have stayed, I should have....” She pulled a necklace from her robes. The chain was pure silver, and it's pendant was....a soul gem – solid black, yet glowing. She could barely hold herself together. I...felt it too. For I knew. Perhaps much less than her, but...she did not have to tell me – it would hurt too much.

I stood, feeling my legs not want to keep moving. But I had to. Even with what I had learned, even with what I had done, I could not rest just yet. It may have taken me a moment, but I put my arms around her chest. “I...won't forget you, mom.”

She smiled, hugging back. That said enough, much more than any words could. I turned back to Tsun. “I'm....ready to go.”

He nodded. “ Return now to Nirn, with this rich boon from Shor, my lord; a shout to bring a hero from Sovngarde in your hour of need. NAHL...DAAL...VUS”

Aw, damn, Max. Now YOU got me crying too! Jeez.... Re-posting Siara's start, I didn't even realize we were that close to a new thread!

Siara N'Gola:

Looking down at the flood where a life had been, I brushed tears from my eyes. Crying wouldn't help a thing. And of course, this sort of sorrow doesn't come with its own release - because there is no fixing something this devastating. I wasn't sure if I was the only one left - but I had the feeling I was. I couldn't - bear - to look for bodies. Not yet. Then again, no telling how soon the waters would recede enough to even make that search possible. Perhaps.... never.

I didn't even know where all this water had come from. One moment, I was walking hand in hand with Amark, and the next he was gone and I was wrapped around a tree, trying not to be gone myself. Ah, Amark.... I might have loved you. But we didn't have time to find out, did we?

The ruin of my life, my home, sent a glaze of darkness across my vision. And a haze of fury across my mind.... What deity does this to its people? We all did what was needed to keep Leki and Ruptga happy, anything they wanted was given with gratitude. But what thanks could I give now?

None.

And.... in fact.... vengeance will be mine. Eventually.

Jensa’s Journal, page 40

It took some doing, but Stenvar and I finally made it to Riften. We camped outside the walls and upwind from the fishery. Damn, that town stinks.

We both had business to deal with, so we agreed to meet back at camp. I strolled in around sundown halfway lit from my critical mead tasting mission. Those Black-Briars may be shady, but they know their brew. Stenvar was already there cooking our meal. He gave me the look that means I should pay attention.

“I told the priest of Mara that we want to get married,” he said. “They’re making all of the arrangements. Tomorrow, Jensa. Or you can still change your mind.”

I had a lot of worries, like what kind of dress should I wear, and are we supposed to give gifts to people who come to the wedding, and is there going to be food and ale, and should I carry my bow in case a dragon attacks the guests, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to say because we don’t have temple weddings in the high passes. But that’s not what came out of my mouth.

“What if I can’t stay faithful?” I asked him. “I mean, I haven’t slept with at least half of the Stormcloak army, for example. That’s a lot left undone, even if you take out most of the women.”

“Uh,” said Stenvar. For a moment it looked like he was in a struggle with his words. “Well, I believe in you, kid.” And he gave me that smile.

Then I believed in me, too. And all at once I knew why I could never stay with a man before, even when there was not a single thing wrong with him. None of them was Stenvar.

On our wedding day I wore my soft blue dress that makes me feel pretty, and Stenvar wore the armor he had on that day in Windhelm. I couldn’t believe how many folks came all the way to Mara’s Temple to wish us well.

The ceremony was a blur, I hardly remember any of it. Just Stenvar nearly crushing my hand, and how my heart skipped when he rumbled out, “Now and forever.”

Then there was a feast, and Black-Briar mead, and a fair number of fights that for once I was not a part of. When we got back to camp we found some of my Shield-Brothers ready to stand watch for us. I pity the bear or bandit that tried to make trouble that night. I have no idea if any did. Stenvar kept me busy.

I was nearly asleep when I remembered. It made me pop up out of the furs like a prairie rabbit. “Stenvar, I never met your Ma!”

“I’ll take you to see her in the morning. She’s not going anywhere.” My sweet man was just about asleep himself.

I gave him a little punch in the gut to wake him. “What the fetch, Stenvar!”

He cracked an eye open. “She’s in a stone box, love. In the Hall of the Dead. Didn’t I tell you?”

I just stared for a moment, then I lay back down and he pulled me in close. There’s a lot that I don’t know about my husband. But I know we said the important things that day. You and me. Now and forever.

Doh! What is with everyone making me cry! I hate crying.

Serethil - Great intro .. and sad .. anger can do so much damage. I am really looking forward to this. (Ok that sounds weird, but I think you know what I mean LOL)

Grits - Jensa ... I love that girl lol .. she just puts it right out there. And Stenvar's reaction is spot on

Maxus - Dang .. that was beautiful.

Maxus, now I'm teary eyed. For Kris to meet his mother in Sovngarde, after the fight of his life, with old memories, and now new, was both joyful and heartbreaking. Not to mention Tsun and Aranea... Loved it!

Grits, So happy for Jensa and Sten!! I nearly lost it when she was worried about being faithful, and the remark about half the army, LOL That girl....

Grits, damn but Jensa's a pistol! That was GREAT! I laughed like a fool at the bit about the army, and the bit about his mother.... And yes 'Witch, I know what you mean! This girl is new - made just a couple days ago, and she started poking the MINUTE she was out of the chargen screen. So here we are. Got to look at maps, figure out where the town was and all that backstory stuff, but I had to promise to put the intro up so I could get any sleep....

And now the fire is a bit more serious, so I have to think about what to put in the trailer in case we need to evac. So.... no more stuff for a bit apparently. Actually, I have a list.... but the big issue is that I need to put my desktop in the trailer, because the laptop - eh, no need to go into a lot of nitnoid details, I just need the desktop. But I need it here too, in order to keep on top of the fire info.... Husband's off to the town meeting about the fire and what the Forest Service/BLM are going to do.... Updates eventually.

But since I can't do anything until husband gets back....

Siara N'Gola:

I looked my last on Fenbeggan. Three days…. and the waters haven’t receded an inch. There is sorcery at work, I know it. Since I’m no mage, I’m unsure why I know it…. but I do. Now, what god would want to drown the lives in a place like this – maybe the only bit of more-or-less swamp in Hammerfell? Not one of our own, I think. And I think on it some as I start the long journey to Taneth, to report to the lord. Or lady. Damn. I don’t even know who is running the place now.

And after much thought… well…. only one god - daedra - after all: Mehrunes Dagon.

Sere, I saw the fires on the news...not good! Keeping my fingers crossed for everyone there!

Siara is gorgeous! Horrible time for her though, and I'm looking forward to more of her story! (tell me she doesn't worship that vile daedra!)

I feel almost disloyal right now, and it's strange. Even though I miss Ake, she was actually finished a couple of weeks ago. Then I started playing with Racemenu, one thing led to another. The guy I was going to make, for my very first male in Skyrim, umm, changed gender and a new Hawkdaughter was born. She's been fiddling in my head, and though I'm still not sure where she's going, she's here. I have some written, I may post it later. Still feels weird to me.

Heh. We'll be fine. I'll get stuff into the trailer, husband will get the truck ready to hook up, and the very last thing will be the desktop. I won't mess with the screens etc. I'll just grab the case - and my PRICELESS original G15 keyboard. The rest of it can burn, we're insured. And we're not into "I'm staying you can't make me go". Holy HELL - why do people DO that? No common sense these days I guess.

Yeah, Si turned out SO good. I don't even know how, but damn, she's really "real" in a way none of the rest have been. Wish I knew how.... I could put it out for a mod! Nope, she's not into any deities but Leki and Ruptga - and right now, she's a bit.... sullen.... since they seem not to have protected Fenbaggen when they should have....

You know.... if you play females.... it's almost impossible to make and play a male protagonist. I can't do it. Seems like you can't either! Bless Ake and Kerik, and their progeny. Love them, but get beyond them.....

Nah, not their progeny, just Hawk Clan progeny.

I've never felt comfortable, or 'in touch' with a male character, though I have played them in Morrowind, and one in Oblivion. I finally gave it up. I was going to try again though, but nope...lol.

I did have a couple I started in wow and rift. They wound up as auction house toons. I just - can't go there. I've never once in my almost 70 years of life EVER wanted to be male. *shudder* Eww. Just.... NO.

And truthfully.... I'm glad Veri decided "The End" before I really thought I needed to make and play Ger. SO not my thing.

So, bottom line on the fire: they're going to aggressively fight it, and get it handled, even though it's classed as wilderness - because there are 400 homes in the path. Which isn't unexpected (we've lived here since 1985.... this is how it works). I wasn't really worried - husband was though he won't admit it (LOT of backwaters there, not going into it). Still.... in the next few days we'll put everything but my desktop into the trailer. Just in case. Realists. That's what we are.

Saira is realistically beautiful. ..and I do like the start of her story.


I'll lend my prayers in your direction and hope for the best with the fires... I hate to see anyone loose their home... it's not the structure, it's the memories attached to a home.

She is, and I have NO clue how it came to be. Kind of wish I did.... for obvious reasons.

Thanks for the prayers. But y'know.... while I'm a realist.... I'm also a fatalist. What happens, happens. If the house goes up in flames, well.... it is what it is. I personally don't have any attachments here. Husband does - but he's also a realist/fatalist. In some ways, we are a perfect match.

Funny how that works. We all have different "comfort zones" about playing the opposite six. A lot of male players feel the same way...can't play a female.

I play both. I tend to play more females than males in roleplaying games, probably about two to one. It started as a conscious response to all of the games with pre-set male protagonists; TES gives me a chance to expand outside my own boundaries. My characters are not "me." I don't feel the need to match my own gender, any more than I would feel compelled to play only humans. I don't worry about whether I'm doing it "right"; I'm portraying a character, not a gender stereotype.

Having said that, I do understand why there's a hesitancy. I can't say with any certainty that I "get" what would be going on in a female mind faced with the actual events we experience in the games; I'm not even sure I "get" how a male would react, faced with those events in "real life"!

The whole thing with me is that it doesn't matter what world, what situation, what time, what scenario - the ONLY way I'm comfortable is female. Period. And.... in fact.... I've refused (over and again) to play any game which forces a character to be male. NOT going there, ever. So, yeah, people keep telling me that Torment is the BEST game ever in terms of RP, and that The Witcher is ditto.... [Added to that... I know ALL about Torment from YEARS of crap in Dragon mag. Eww. Gross. Bite me.]

But those games force me to play a guy. I DON'T WANT TO BE A GUY. So - sorry (um.... not really). I'm not playing those games - and I'm not paying your company to play those games.

Get with the program. If you don't offer options (and it's not just fem options, it's LGBTQ options) I personally am not going to buy or play your games. Period.

I'm the same way, though I play more males to females 2:1 I don't have much of a problem with it.

On the other hand the bolded part is why I understand why women in particular would rather not play guy characters. Most of my RL female friends say that when given the option they'd rather play a female character over a male, because it's such a rare option when it comes to gaming. (Though it seems to be something that's somewhat starting to change, whether it's a female option or a female protagonist)

Not to say that it's everyone's reason, just one that I happen to notice is common. At least among the women that I know that game. That said, none of them refuse to play a male character unless it's an RPG. But then I tend to be the same way because I hate being railroaded into such a narrow option when it comes to RPG's.

edit: ninja'd?