Salutations forum people! I'm back with another strange and fresh story to keep things interesting. I'm currently in the process of doing a research paper on Samuel Beckett and you could type that he's had some influence on this story. Hope you all enjoy the madness! Please comment as always (pretty please)!
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The Lone Wanderer is?wandering?across the wasteland and takes the time to fire some 10 mm rounds into a lifeless Brahmin corpse; for fun of course (did that rhyme?). He soon after reloads his pistol, putting a fresh batch of bullets into the gun. The pistol is placed back into the inventory.

Part I

Setting: Inventory


Enter Bullet into Gun:

Gun: Why good afternoon Mister Bullet. You look somewhat familiar. Have we met before?

Bullet: I cannot say we have. This is the first time we've made contact with each other. Remember when the man reloaded a couple seconds ago?

Gun: Ah yes, another magazine. How could I forget?! It's quite a travesty my steel encased brethren. So many bullets have past by that I can never tell which one is which.

Bullet: Not that I'm any different from the others.

Gun: Don't say that. You're?unique in your own way. I'm sure the factory workers put their undeniable love into you.

Bullet: Undeniable love to get a pay check.

Gun: Plus they probably died in the nuclear explosion and had no care about you in that time frame.

Bullet: Much obliged for the moral support.

Gun: Look, I never really had the time to develop a conversation with any of you. Thankfully this guy has refrained from his trigger happy tendencies for now. We'll have to make the most of this.

Bullet: Okay then.


(Awkward Silence)


Bullet: You wanted to talk right?

Gun: I don't know what to talk about. I've never had this opportunity before. Uh?how about that weather today?

Bullet: Or lack thereof?

Gun: Damn it. Why must you ruin the conversation?

Bullet: I'm just stating what I've seen. I'm a bullet. I'm inside you, remember?


(Feeling of foulness encompasses the area)


Gun: Aw now that's just gross! Oh god I've never thought of that. You sick son of a [censored]!

Bullet: There's no weather anyway. Is there?

Gun: You're right. It's rather mild everyday. But man, how?

Bullet: Maybe you could get your mind out of the gutter for a second?

Gun: Shut up! Count your prayers buddy. In a couple of seconds you could be blasted into the belly of an ugly raider and left to rot in his ugly corpse. Ever thought about that?

Bullet: Indeed I actually have. It is like contemplating about the afterlife for these humans. What will happen after I'm used up? Could I fly into an armored soldier? Into a Brahmin? Into a Super Mutant? What if I missed my target? I could be flying for an eternity!

Gun: Jeez, I didn't realize you bullets were so introspective.

Bullet: Trust me; you would if you were sitting in someone's inventory for what seemed like an eternity.

Gun: You don't think I have? I'm a 10 mm pistol for Christ's sake! I'm lucky he's using me in the beginning. He'll find more effective and cooler weapons than me and I'll then be long forgotten!

Bullet: We might be old buddies by that point in time.

Gun: Might as well start here. I see we're getting along just fine.

Well...... It's, certainly different. :hehe:

Moral of the story; don't eat mushrooms found in your backyard if you know nothing about them. :hehe:

Kid, let me say this: You have an Imagination that is inventive and can capture the reader's interest.

Very few writers would box themselves by this limitation that you've put on the story. You have done it and that took balls.

Go on kid. I want to see what you can develop from this.

:lmao: That's hilarious. I love it!

I'm speechless. You are truely an amazing writer. When thinking of a bullet and gun carrying on a conversation most would laugh. You, however have turned it into gold. Congrats on another great idea!

Very very nice. I love your imagination!
Is this going to continue, or is it just a 1 part story?

yes, you seem to have the ability to turn anything from funny, to hilarious!

Potentially my favorite fan-fic I've ever read. Props!

Unbelievable... What a very odd fic. You must keep this up!

Crap, didn't realize I'd get so many comments when I came back. Thanks for the support everyone! Here's part deux. Hopefully it's alright. Comments are welcome!

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Part II

Setting: Inventory


Enter Bullet into Gun

Gun: So how long have we've been here?

Bullet: We? I don't know about you, but I've been here ever since the kid picked me up from a metal crate on a beached boat.

Gun: Why were you in a metal crate? But more importantly, why on a boat?

Bullet: I have no idea. It made absolutely no sense to me. But what am I to complain or question reality? I'm just a bullet.

Gun: Amen brother.

Bullet: So why are we here anyway?

Gun: I'll tell you one thing my friend; war, war never?

Bullet: (quickly interrupts) I mean why are we talking in the first place?

Gun: (shocked) Oh?thought you actually meant?I don't know. I really don't know.

Bullet: Bah, look at me being a downer. We need to be optimistic about this.

Gun: About what?

Bullet: About sitting in this inventory! Do you really need to be repaired?

Gun: I don't think this guy has bumped up his repair skills yet.

Bullet: Too bad for you. At least I don't get damaged because I'm a bullet. Haha!

Gun: Well at least I don't have to come face to face with some fugly mother [censored]ers and be inside them for the rest of my life. svcks to be you!

Bullet: You got me there, touch?.

Gun: What is this inventory anyway? Feels like some empty abyss.

Bullet: I know. Figure that we are with a lot of random things. Keys, leaf blowers, and?uh?strange meat.

Gun: God no! Strange meat? Are you serious? That's disgusting man! Gross, gross, gross!

Bullet: For a gun you're quite a pansy.

Gun: Be quiet Mister Bullet! You don't know what pressure us weapons have to be tough all the time. Okay, we break under pressure sometimes, but doesn't everyone?

Bullet: You got a point there. You're probably the first gun I've come across that acted this way.

Gun: Trust me; I'm the only gun you've come across.

Bullet: Is this conversation getting a bit awkward?


(Awkwardness)


Gun: It only is because you said it was. Moving on?

Love it.

I'm having some fun with this. It's always fun to shake things up. Here's another section of this truely peculiar tale. Let me know what you think!

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Part III

Setting: Inventory

Enter Bullet into Gun


Bullet: This is pretty weird isn't it?

Gun: You mean the nature of this conversation?

Bullet: Nah, forget about it. You think the Lone Wanderer forgot about you?

Gun: (somber) I think so. He probably found some cool laser pistol or something. Probably only using it because it shoots red beams and goes ZAP!

Bullet: ZAP?!...?

Gun: I would assume that's the sound a laser would make.

Bullet: How would you know that?

Gun: It's only an assumption!

Bullet: Silly boy?they never learn.

Gun: Tell me about it.

Bullet: But it's all good though. You have some time to know about what's inside you.

Gun: Oh joy.

Bullet: Tell me about it man.

Gun: Right.


Enter Grenade


Bullet: Who the [censored] is this?

Gun: Well, well, if it isn't Miss Grenade.

Grenade: Miss Grenade? What are you talking about? Where am I?

Gun: I apologize if I mistook your gender. You are now in the Lone Wanderer's inventory. You were probably picked up by him a couple seconds ago.

Grenade: A?an inventory?

Bullet: Yeah buddy. Stuck here until you are used!

Grenade: (scared) Used?

Gun: Shut up Bullet. You're frightening him.

Bullet: Frightening him? He's a [censored] grenade! How does he not know he goes boom!?

Grenade: Boom? What are you talking about? Stop it!

Bullet: Kablam! Explode! Implode! Do you not know what you do?

Gun: He's obviously a kid dude.

Bullet: Oh thank you for that Mister Pistol. Mistaking this grenade for a girl. How the hell can you tell the gender of an inanimate object eh?

Gun: It's?uh?quite easy actually. You?uh

Bullet: My point exactly! Look kid, it might not be long until?


Exit Grenade


Bullet: And there he goes. Hopefully he deals enough damage or actually kills something.

Gun: Not so smooth Mister Bullet. I'd hate to see you as a parent.

Bullet: You think bullets have kids? My god, you need to get repaired quickly.

Somehow you manage to pull this off fantastically. Keep up the good work.

Kid, let me say this....in your own way, you are a freaking GENIUS!!! I actually did the...

...you young ones ever see an old TV series called M.A.S.H?

...in that series, the horror of war was mixed with the zany absurdities of nothing at all - kind of like 'Seinfeld' meets 'Full metal Jacket' - and you laughed and cried and frowned and grinned at the same time..


...Kid, let me call you butter 'cause you on a roll! GO FOR IT!!!


:thumbsup:

Ah ha I like the second one :goodjob:

*part tongue in cheek, part tribute*

Bullet: In a way you might be right.

Gun: What do you mean?

Bullet: About me having children. Y'know, in humans it goes like this...

Gun: DON'T GO THERE. Gross. GROSSS. You're disGUSTing...

Bullet: That's what happens when you haven't been fired in a while.

Gun: STOP THAT!

Bullet: You wanna shoot me, and you can't, huh? Oh, the frustration.

Gun: Which gutter produced you?

Bullet: We're all metal, brother. But you're the first metal I've met with no mettle.

So many things I could say to this fanfic. Some would get me banned...

My favorite (that won't get me banned) is "Your creativity never fails to shine."

Nevermind, was joking. Sorry.

:clap: :clap: :clap:

Well done, well done, please continue.

Absolutely nothing wrong with it to my eyes, then again, I am half passed out. Hehe, great work, I loved it.

Much obliged for the support fellas. It all really drives me (besides self motivation of course). This story is getting written pretty quick and I don't want it feeling rushed. I guess I'm kind of lucky that it isn't turning out that way but who knows. I'm running out of ways to type that the next section is up so I'm just going to supply the goods. Comments would be great!

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Part IV

Setting: You probably already know it right about now so I'm not going to waste any space trying to describe it in a lengthy and gratuitous run on sentence.

Enter Bullet into Gun


Gun: How long have we've been talking for?

Bullet: I'd say for about three posts.

Gun: Posts?

Bullet: You wouldn't understand Mister 10 mm.

Gun: How do you know I wouldn't?

Bullet: Look, get this guy to repair you and maybe then you'll realize that this is all a fa?ade.

Gun: A fa?ade? When did you become the omniscient inanimate object?

Bullet: I've always been. You always seemed to be a bit slower and less entertaining than me in this whole conversation.

Gun: It doesn't matter now. We have to cherish each other's company for what it's meant to be.

Bullet: To shoot me out in order to maim or kill someone or something?

Gun: Pretty much.

Bullet: You [censored]!

Gun: Whoa there buddy. Don't bite the barrel that discharges you.

Bullet: And he has jokes ladies and gentlemen. The pistol can not only talk but can also tell jokes!

Gun: You think this guy, the Lone Wanderer, can hear us?

Bullet: I don't really care anymore. All I know is that this dude really has to be pompous to give himself a cheesy nickname.

Gun: I wonder if he had that nickname when he was young.

Bullet: How embarrassing!

Gun: Tell me about it!

Bullet: "Howdy, my name's Billy but you can call me the 'Lone Wanderer'."


(Laughing commences)


Gun: Hold on for a second.


(Holding on for a second)


Gun: Did we just laugh? Did plain old pieces of metal start to giggle?

Bullet: Yeah, so?

Gun: It just doesn't seem right. A gun isn't supposed to laugh. It isn't theoretically plausible.

Bullet: So you think it's 'theoretically plausible' for a 10 mm pistol and a 10mm bullet to have a lengthy conversation. And let's not forget talking to an 'adolescent' fragmentation grenade. Do you think any of that is 'plausible'?

Gun: Hmm?no sir. No sir it doesn't make any sense at all.

Bullet: Well praise Jesus! You finally are getting the picture, or lack thereof. Did you get repaired?

Gun: It's a funny thing Mister Bullet; I can never tell if I'm repaired or not. It's like this guy has telepathic repairing powers.

Bullet: (impressed) You know what, take back what I said about him a little earlier. This Lone Wanderer might be the coolest guy ever.

Gun: Tell me about it.

Bullet: No thanks.

Wowie, I love this a little more after every sentence! Wonderful work!

Keep it up. This stuff is a breath of fresh air.

I appreciate the support everyone! Another part has been added to the absurdity. Please type to me what you think!

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Part VI

Setting: I hope you know by now

Enter Bullet into Gun


Gun: Why can't we end it all?

Bullet: Excuse me? Are you contemplating suicide?

Gun: Yes I am. Life isn't worth living anymore man. We're going to be stuck here for a long time and then be sold for chump change.

Bullet: I need you to use your logic Mister Gun. How would you be able to kill yourself? I'm actually very curious about this.

Gun: Hmm?any suggestions?

Bullet: I don't know man. You don't have any arms do you?

Gun: No. Did you take them from me when I wasn't looking?


(Silence)


Bullet: You think I have pockets? Want to look around? Oh I forgot; you don't have legs either! You're a freaking gun!

Gun: Thanks for the news flash genius.

Bullet: Are you serious? Did you truly get repaired?

Gun: Maybe I did, maybe I didn't. Don't judge ok!

Bullet: Because bullets actually judge people and things. Riddle me this; how are we able to talk and have feelings eh? How and when did we begin to start being able to do this? Can all other inanimate objects do this? Do they have feelings too?

Gun: I don't think Strange Meat has feelings.

Bullet: Would it Mister Gun? Would it?

Gun: Gross man. Gross?

Bullet: I think this all started with a skit. Lookie here.


(Bullet contemplates about things)


Gun: Whoa! What is that?

Bullet: That my friend is what I call an action bubble. It this is truly a skit script, they need to give the reader an idea of what we are feeling.

Gun: That's pretty stupid. Guns and bullets aren't supposed to feel anything.

Bullet: You must catch on slowly or something. I'm glad you understand but my god man, really?

Gun: Why are we in this skit anyway?

Bullet: I think we are because it's different or original or something. Nobody has seen guns and bullets talk before. Have you?

Gun: You're asking a gun this?

Bullet: Am I?

Gun: Oh my lord...I think we are part of something greater than us my friend. Something totally above our heads.

Bullet: [censored] just got real.

I'm probably going to add one more part to this story. Any feedback or comments before that happens would be fantastic.

As Spock would say, 'Fascinating'. As I am going to say, 'Brilliant, inventive and way out cool'. Love the concept and the way you have used it. Will certainly keep on reading this topic.