Create a Load-screen Message! : V - Skyrim

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 4:54 am

"Fast traveling again eh?"

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 8:54 pm

Stop you pirating scum, you have violated the law! You must pay the court fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit !

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:17 am

"Ma'iq wishes he had a stick he could give you. But Ma'iq doesn't have a stick."

I can't remember it exactly, but something like this.

"Becoming a Grand Champion may have adverse effects"

"This is where Gabe Newel has secretly been hiding. Gordon is still looking for him, and would like your help"

"You are reading this"

"Remember: Children have feelings too"

"This is an 18, why do you have it?"

"Three Dog here, master of all he surveys. Oh wait, this is actually the right radio station..."

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 7:16 am

Don't attempt to ride a dragon without buckling up!

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 3:50 am

Use arrows wisely, they are deadly but limited in supply.

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 11:29 pm

"One doe's not simply walk into skyrim"

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 4:04 am

Stop you pirating scum, you have violated the law! You must pay the court fine or serve your sentence. Your stolen goods are now forfeit !

This would be an awesome anti-piracy measure. Any players playing pirated copies would load a game, spend an hour customizing, go through the tutorial, and then suddenly see a psychic guard say that. Then, the game would be deleted.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 2:30 am

200 years ago, guards had an ability which allowed them to know your every crime, no matter when and where you are.

200 years ago, a hero saved Tamriel from daedra.

And many others that mention lore,jokes,etc... from past games.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 4:41 am

"Game too difficult? lower the difficulty in the main menu. Still to difficult? The next Elder Scrolls will be more simplified and easier!"

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 7:30 pm

"Arrive at peaceful resolutions by using superior firepower".

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 1:32 am

"Don't go, there's a dimensional shambler right around the corner!" ~classic Doom quote.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 7:39 am

Don't feed the Yao Guai!

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 6:59 am

Why don't you go for a walk outside. :whistling:

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 1:13 am

Being a Khajiit has it's advantages, although the Rats will still pwn you.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 12:13 am

"Sure, you can climb the Throat of the World, just don't let it lick you."

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 5:34 am

"Reticulating Spli-- wait, wrong game."

"Wì not treì a hòlid?y in Skyrím this y?r? Seé the l?velí lakes, the w?nderf?l tráv?l system, and maní íntèresting fúrr? án?m?ls, ínclüding the m?jestík m??se.

We apologise for the fault in this load screen. The developer has been sacked."

then, the next load screen

"M? s?ster wás b?ttèn b? ? m??se ?nce.

We apologise again for the fault in this entry. Those responsible for sacking the devloper who has just been sacked, have been sacked."

And I'm too lazy to reporduce the colorful one.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 10:30 am

"I HAVE NO ~~GREETING~~ TEXT!"

"When in doubt, complain on the forums."

"In Soviet Skyrim, dragon shouts you!"

"Here's how to defeat Alduin: First you..." (Loading screen finishes)

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 11:54 pm

If you hit pause just as the game loads after this screen, you get to see a naked dragon

The weapons of Skyrim are based into three groups, Single handed, Two handed and Archery

Aren't all dragons naked?

I mean, the dragons that have been shown so far haven't worn any clothes.

Do they even make pants big enough?

"You can swim as far north as you want, but you are not going to reach Atmora"

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 12:21 am

"If you feel like Skyrim isn't enough of a RPG, then please don't complain on the forums. Not only will it not help your cause, but you'll piss off those fans who have always wanted for a game not to be boring"

And as an addon to this one:

"Why fight with dice when you can fight with swords?"

"Elven gear: should be renamed Ayleid gear, as none of the elves presently living in Tamriel can make them anyways"

"Adoring fan: only annoying when you bring him with you. So why complain?"

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 8:43 pm

"If you must travel by the nines stay on the roads or under the cover of the wilderness if all else fails. The skies aren't safe any more, there's been sightings. Of dragons."

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 10:55 pm

"Dual-wielding a knife and fork can be delicious"

Sigged!

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 8:31 am

"Just because they don't have ketchup doesn't mean the Dragons will think twice about eating you. Be wary."

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 2:02 am

" I thought you said on the forums that you weren't gonna buy the game"

» Thu Mar 31, 2011 9:46 pm

The Bard's College is north of Solitude, where you can learn to blow a lute.

» Fri Apr 01, 2011 5:33 am

You know what would be interesting? What if M'iaq was our loading screen? I mean what if all the tips in the game are written as if M'iaq said them? and... randomly during loading screens instead of the useless "press B to open your inventory" kind of stuff, we could have M'iaq say something funny, or give us an interesting tip, or tell of events in other regions?

I really hope M'iaq is implemented in some way, even if he would be impossibly old.

Maybe if he became a vampire and then cured himself like in the beggining of skyrim :celebration: