Create your own guard oneliner : V

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:53 am

Just a fun thread to create your own Guard one-liner

Guard Race:
Player/Other NPC Race:
Guards Weapon/Shield:
Player/Other NPC Gender:
Guard Gender:
Guard Status:
Situation:
Oneliner:

------------------------------------

I will create my own

Guard Race:Nord
Player/Other NPC Race:Don't matter
Guards Weapon/Shield:Fist
Player/Other NPC Gender:Female
Guard Gender:Male
Guard Status:Aggresive
Situation:Arrest Resisted
Oneliner:Normally i don't punch any female but your such a scum i just need to knock you out !!!

Now make your Guard one-liner

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:24 am

.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 10:16 am

Don't know much about different races and their differences but they could have something like:
I'm going to make you feel like sushi ( though it would be very unrealistic, since sushi wasn't really discovered in the west back then, but who knows )

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:37 pm

Stop there you evil scum or I'll run for help!

Not creative check. Boring check. Stupid enough to get stuck in peoples heads? Check. I got my one liner.

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:24 pm

Seen any... DRAGONS? Hahahahahaha

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:22 am

"I'll shove my foot so deep in your azz your with be smellin like footlocker water repellin."

Guard one-liner.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:04 am

Seen any... DRAGONS? Hahahahahaha

This got a chuckle out of me lo.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:09 am

Hey good looking, I should lock you up for being far too pretty.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 12:32 am

"Why you little..."

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:10 am

Ha! I've fought drunkards with more skill than you!

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:26 pm

WHY WONT YOU LIVE!

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:00 pm

Guard Race:Nord
Player/Other NPC Race:Argonian
Guards Weapon/Shield:Doesn't matter
Player/Other NPC Gender:Doesn't matter
Guard Gender:Doesn't matter
Guard Status:Angry
Situation:Arrest resisted
Oneliner:I don't know whether to fight or to let the weather kill you.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:01 am

You: Hey guard!
Guard: You die now!
You: I'm ready, just try it!
Guard: Aaaarrrgh!

You: Owned.

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:19 pm

You are a person who I think is probably not good... at more things... than you are good at! Ha!

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 8:30 am

STOP! Or I'll yell STOP again!

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 2:13 am

Guard with a bow says, "Go ahead, make my day."
(If you don't get the reference I fear for your education in classic movies)

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 9:53 am

intresting fact : everytime i read the title of this topic i read eyeliner instead of oneliner.

guard race: khajit
other race: any

MEOW!

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 6:46 am

Race: Imperial.

My name is Iniago Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:47 am

Whiterun Municiple Code, 213: Willfull destruction of property, that's two years. Code 310: Illegal possession of assault weapons, five years. Code 457: Resisting arrest, TWENTY years!
I AM the Law!

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 8:54 pm

Race: Nord
"Spear me"!

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 4:47 am

Nord guards don't say anything, they cut you wide open.

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 6:48 pm

You were just caught stealing and a guard has stopped you.
Guard: ...
You: Bring it on pig!
Guard: ...
You: I will gut you like a fish!
Guard: ...
You: You take all the fun out of this part.

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:00 am

Guard catches you stealing

"Get here you thieving little [censored]
"Your stolen budget brand crisps are hereby forfeit. We won't send you to jail though. You will be free to steal again in 2 hours after a slap on the wrist"

» Thu Jun 30, 2011 1:47 am

Redguard guard after you've tried [censored] him over says "And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee!"

» Wed Jun 29, 2011 6:32 pm

Race: Redguard

One liner: I pity the fool who breaks the law on my watch.