Lug-nut: "I'm only gonna say this once: give me the Naughty Nightwear!"

You: "No! It's mine!"

He runs off or you fight over it. Awesome. Double awesome if your character is a guy.

I love all the really stupid jokes your butler makes if you get the Megaton house. (Wadsworth I think)

wow, it repels them that much ? -- Moira Brown

Robobrain:

"Are you afraid of me? I'm really not as bad as i look."
"I hope we can still be friends after this."
"You should know i'm quite good at killing things. You may want to run now."
"They could have programmed me to love, and to forgive, but noooo..."

Shame it doesn't say "I hope you'd come out, i have a cake for you."

And the prophet:
"Try new BLAMMO! Blasts stains out, blasts the whole world out! We've all been BLAMMO'd!"

Ha!!! The Preacher. How could I have fogotten about The Preacher!!!
"You don't know, you can't know. Little fools. You wish you knew! You wish! But only I know! Only me! Only me! Only me!"

I find everything Liberty Prime says to be amusing.

Erm listening to 3 dog's radio station and when The adventures of Herbert Dashwood came on i can just remember him saying ''Argyle you magnificent B*****d!'' i lol'd :vaultboy:

"Stop right there mister or ill blow your [censored] head off" - Mayor Macreedy of Little Lamplight. And if you had Child at Heart perk the rest of the conversation you have with him can be pretty funny lol.

Me: I think he just wants to get in your pants.
Her: That's silly, why would he want a girls pants?

:facepalm:

"Communism is a LIE!"

I agree that the Super Mutants do have the best ones... can't think of any at the moment.

i recently found little lamp light but its empty 100% empty wheres everyone ??? or any one did that Yao Guai eat them ???

I'm on my first playthrough of Mothership Zeta. I just found "Alien Captive Log 2: Vin". It made me laugh out loud.

The entire thing is pretty funny, but the way they cut off the end is hilarious!!!

If it wasn't for the ESRB I would have wiped out that damn cave.

"And now a super important public service announcement...don't feed the Yao Guai! That is all."

"Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic." -Wadsworth
"So yes... I am the guard dog." -Cerberus
"Self determination is not a malfunction." -A3-21, to avoid spoilers
"The good news is that you're all better. The bad news is that you suffered a teeny tiny, umm... mutation." Moira
"They say: Oh how horrible, how can you do this, not me I have a kid in Rivet City. Well I have kids too!" -That guy in Andale
Alien Captive Recordings 1, 3, and 18
And anything said by our president John Henry Eden

"Does it involve money? Because I like money. Like, a lot." - Lone Wanderer

This comes from Joseph in Little Lamplight: "When in danger or in doubt, shoot to kill, then run out!"

'Yeah, yeah...you like that?' (when shooting a raider in the face)
'Take that you b*****d' (also when shooting a raider in the face)
'If conversation is what you wish of me, then I shall provide it.'

All by Charon

"Ow, that really hurt! (Mothership Zeta)" It's funny cuz her voice in slomo plus her whole badass facade.

One of my favorites: Go Underworld! Go Ghouls! Yay! ...Damn this pansy zombie programming. - Cerberus.
Another one from random Super Mutant: Hurry up and Die, I'm hungry!!!

"Didn't the Founding Fathers give us guns and tell us to feel free to take them out if they [censored] up?" -The Lone Wanderer

*woof*

Dogmeat

"Aroo?"
-Dogmeat

They keep trying to kill me and won't even give the censored reason why!
- Somewhere in PL

Optimus Liberty Prime- Communism is death!

Argyle - " Funny business? Why, Miss Chase, you hurt my feelings. I mean, there ain't nothin' funny about the EAGLE CLAW!"
Lone Wanderer to Moira Brown about mole rat repelent - " It's like explosive wack-a-mole! Can you make it in bullet form? for people?" (to make it better Moira even takes the stick away from you with that option lol )
Doc Lesko "... it would take a scientist to explain it. Oh wait, I'm a scientist. How Marvelous" I just find the way he says "how marvelous" hilarious

and lasty, I discovered this just a few days a ago. its not so much a quote, but in the museum of technology there are computers with the shows listing for a huge 3d theater. there is one that puts the audience in traffic, on that puts them on a rollercoaster, and then one titled "colonoscopy: an exciting tour of a very familiar part of the human body" certainly not what I was expecting to find under two completely reasonable results. =O