So what's with the Hearthfire Homes?

Flipping sorcerers in my back yard at Lakeview Manor busting their rhymes. Blinking dead Draugr littering my doorstep at Winstad Manor like barroom drunks.

And that's even before I move in.

Then it's a quote/unquote choice between a Giant bonking my library tower with his bodger or having Mrs Dragonborn and the little dragonborns kidnapped by flipping degenerate Bandits.

I wanted paradise Beth, not flaming bedlam.

Explanation?!

Welcome to Hearthfire.

Welcome to modern Skyrim, inhabited by blasphemous heathens who worship a man as a God. If the Dragon cult were in charge, Skyrim would be the pinnacle of civilization, surpassing even the pompous Mer of the Isles.

Skyrim is a dump, even if you're in a fully walled city you can't go outside for a morning walk without being attacked by a pack of Vampires. The Hearthfire locations are basically property that the Jarl was previously planning to put public outhouses but then had to cancel due to a lack of tax funds. Vampire Holes, Giant gamps or Necromancers, take your pick.

Can't wait to read how the country got ruined or destroyed in the next game.

To say nothing of the three bandits hiding in the bushes in your garden on a regular basis. The estate agent didn't mention any of these problems to me either when I purchased the plot!