How is Steam dysfunctional? Just because your ISP svcks, don't blame Steam. I have NEVER had a problem with Steam. Online activation and usage are the future of gaming. Get used to it. It's not going away.
Um, yeah, it's not my ISP, dude. You may have never had problems with Steam, but your reading comprehension seems problematic. I was NOT HOME. I was somewhere with NO INTERNET. I took the disc of a game I paid for and, stupidly, expected to be able to play a non-multiplayer, fully updated game without having to get online. Steam would not start up in 'offline' mode. The Steam forums are full of complaints about this very issue, so obviously it's not just my issue.
I guess because YOU have never experienced an issue, then no one else in the world has either. Maybe if you left your parents basemant occasionally you would experience the same issue. If I buy a single player game for my PC on disc, I expect to be able to play that game whenever I want, not at the whim of a service completely unrelated to the game's manufacturer, a service that knows there is an issue with their offline capability and simply refuses to fix it.
I also expect that the game's manufacturer would be more responsible then this, as their reputation is being tarnished by the failure of a company outside of their control. If Bethesda required me to use Steam to register or update, that's fine. But to FORCE me to open Steam to simply play the game is BS.
Maybe in the future you should READ and UNDERSTAND the issue before making ignorant statements.