Good one!

Yeah, Cheydinhal is not a very friendly place. I guess having a gang of skooma smugglers (not to mention, a guild of murderers) can have a negative effect on a town.


I love it when NPCs contradict themselves.

Beggar: "One more coin and I can get a pair of shoes."
Me: "Here ya go, one gold coin."
Beggar: "Thank ye kind sir. Blessings of Akatosh upon ye."
*two days pass*
Beggar: " One more coin and I can get a pair of shoes."
Me: "I gave you a coin for that very purpose two days ago. Tell you what, you can have these pigskin shoes I took off a conjurer that tried to fry me this morning. And you can have the gold I took off of him, too."
Beggar: "Thank ye kind sir. Blessings of Julianos upon ye."
*another day passes*
Beggar: "One more coin and I can get a pair of shoes."
Me: "But...but you're wearing the shoes I gave you yesterday."
Beggar: "I'm only asking for a single coin."
Me: "I've given you several. What do you do, eat them?"
Beggar: "I can eat for a day on a single coin."
Me: "By the Nine! You do eat them! No wonder you're crazy; most of those coins are actually lead that's been painted to appear gold."

Mage: "Are you out of your mind? Take that robe off at once!"
Solina: "Wow, you're not the least bit subtle, are you? Well, if keep this up, I'll send my nastiest spell up your nose."

Orc Marauder: "You humans are all the same! Weak and worthless!"
Solina: "Think so, do you?" *casts Tempest, Marauder dies, soul is trapped in Black Soul Gem* "Still think that?"

Necromacer: "I'm just warming up, you pathetic worm!" *summons zombie*
Solina: "Let me help you with that." *casts Flame Maelstrom (fire damage 50 points in 10 feet for 5 seconds), Necromancer dies*
Solina: "If you can't take the heat, don't mess with someone who plays with fire."

Bandit: "Die, Imperial! Die!"
Rax: "What're you gonna do if I don't?"
Bandit: *dies*
Rax: "Oh. Well, I like this arrangement better."

Good ones, people!

Vampire: "Come to me, sweet flesh!"
Solina: *summons Headless Zombie* "Go play with the vampire, sweetie. It's okay, you can bite him."

Conjurer: "You're pathetic!"
Solina: "Think so? Let's see you top THIS!" *casts Summon Atronach Force (Summon Flame, Frost & Storm Atronachs for 45 seconds - personal mod)
Conjurer: "Am I supposed to be impressed?"
Solina: "Wait for it..."
Conjurer: *is blasted to death by Solina's atronachs*
Solina: *uses Staff of Worms to reanimate conjurer* "Impressed yet?"

Bandit, fighting summoned skeleton: "This is the part where you fall down and bleed to death!"
Solina: "Umm..hate to break it to ya, but Fred doesn't have any blood."

Highwayman: "Your money, or your life."
Arya: "I don't carry money, and I'd like to keep my life. Is there something else I can offer you?
Highwayman: "We can do it that way, if you like."
Arya: "Umm...yeah, I don't like the look in your eye. Lemme fix that real quick." *puts Dawnstrike through Highwayman's eye*

This Highwayman at Fort Ash right? lols he jump out from the bush, the Imperial patrol just pass by, not a wise move.

Owyn : "I heard a rumor that you're an idiot. Any truth to that?"
Me : "I heard the same about you"

Actually, this was the one on the bridge over the Upper Niben (south of the Imperial City). After impaling him through the eye, Arya decided to feed the local slaughterfish and dumped his body over the side of the bridge.


NPC: "Look at the muscles on you!"
Arya: "Oh, please. Don't pretend you're looking at my muscles."

Conjurer: "What's that?"
Solina: "A spell heading for your face." *casts Acadian's Cataclysm*
Conjurer: *is launched across the room* "I need to cut down on the ale. Starting to see things, I am."
Solina: "That must be some good stuff." *kills conjurer, looks for ale*

This next one is a bit...mature, shall we say? As such, spoilers:

Bandit: "Your money... or your life"

Me: "Come and get it"

Bandit: "Thats how I prefer it"

Me: