So i was running around as a werewolf to get somewhere faster, and i come accross some imperials standing over dead bodies, easy prey to keep me goin... the guys stop me, and try to make me pay them for interrupting "imperial business........." [censored], Im a werewolf..you dont negotiate with werewolves...these guys obviously had jsut killed the imperials and were impersonating them. funny that they tried to talking to me though..

"hey look... a werewolf! we should try to have a reasonable disscussion with it about the percurment of gold from him!"

"hail friend, gives us 100 septims"

"grr..."

"just 100 gold for interrupting our business"
five minute later...
*werewolf looking full and licking it's lips*

that is how i imagine somethign like that would go

Hi everyone im new to this forum thing and have had skyrim since it come out and have seen some funny and weird things going on but also seen some great moments with my Nord Warrior called buliwyf I just wanted to see what everyone else moments were and to have a good laugh about them!!

I had a moment last night fighting a Elder Dragon, i was loosing badly and didnt have much health so decided to run for some cover i saw a cave just off the road and obv thought 'nice place to hide while i regen my Health' ran to the cave as the Dragon was about to swoop down to find three bears run out and annhilate me within second... i did laugh at first but then felt bad for my character haha

i killed some ppl in riverwood, wanted to get away on my horsey, got massive lagspike (ps3 pre 2.1), jumped with my horsey and litterally got a flying horse o.O

I havnt used the horses yet but have seen one floating down river!? haha

I was travelling along a road near whiterun and came across a sacked carriage.

The owner was dead...

The horse was half underground with its front end under the map and its rear end sticking up vertically.

HA! Must of tripped and face planted itself into the dirt! ive not seen that yet to be honest have seen sacked carriages around though but no one in sight its a bit scary lool

So i was having a hard time getting through this dungeon that everything was casting ice attacks, so i waited 3 days and allowed my vampirism to reach stage 4 to get the 100% frost resistance buff, anyways they then started using thunder attacks....but thats not the funny part....

so now that I am stage 4 vampire, i needed to get back to stage 1 by feeding off someone, so i take off all my heavy armor and put on my ragged cloths you get from the beginning of the game, and make my way to riverwood, and save before i get to close, granted my sneak isn't that high so it took many attempts going through undetected, but alas i FINALLY manage to sneak into a house and the patron of the home is fast asleep, so not taking any chance i throw on my vampire invisibility spell and slowly edge myself over for a little snack then return to being a stage one vampire, and regain my acceptance into society

I run out of the house to greet everyone with open arms whom have been trying to kill me (and succeeded many times) and almost instantly as i open the door, ancient dragon lands in front of me and fire breath to the face! :flamethrower:
insta kill'd, and thinking i was safe after i ate, i didn't save :banghead:

On a mountainside when I was up on a draughr plateu a bandit came running towards me, I lined up my bow and shot him.
Turns up he became paralyzed and rolled off the plateu to the abyss.


Another part was early levels when I was out exploring, I got two of those tree people after me and I hightailed it out of there.
As I went through the bushes in full speed I saw a moose pop out right in front of me, and in this second time slowed down and I thought to myself "Oh crap, that moose is probably gonna attack me now too!"
When all of the sudden a bear tackled the moose right in front of me as I kept running forward, and now I heard bear grunts right behind me.
Laughing maniacly out of fear I jumped off a cliff and died.

T'was awesome.

HAHAHA No way! how unlucky!! I didnt know dragons can attack towns im gonna have to be on the lookout now!! I havnt been a vampire yet either but have killed plenty of them.

A funny moment i had with vampires was when i was in the middle of a battle with two of them, i managed to kill the one but had to back off from the other only having a little bit of health left. As i got ready for the final confrontation some guy comes up to me and asks me to hold a bow for him!? i was like 'WHAT THE HELL IM IN BATTLE GET AWAY' the vampire then instead of hittin me slammed his mace straight into me knocking me back, then out of no where some [censored] saber tooth comes in attacking that guy with a hunter! I just ran and got out it was complete chaos but i was laughing at the same time.

After i went back killed the saber tooth and looted all the bodies! Love how random this game is!

Haha! Very good. Something that amused me (mainly because I'm so pleased that it actually worked):

I married Mjoll the Lioness from Riften, and she moved into my Whiterun house. Trouble is she's always followed around by this guy called Aerin, and I was disgusted to see that he was planning on moving in with me and my new wife. I was very displeased - I'm the Dovakhiin, I'm not going to sit by and let some chump cockblock me in my own home. Luckily, however, his AI told him to walk all the way back to Riften, so I followed him out of the gates, waited till we were alone in the wilderness, and chopped the bastard's head off and threw his corpse in the river. I then took his fancy rings off and presented them as gifts to my new wife, who was none the wiser

Only trouble was, I actually lost his head... hopefully no guards will stumble across it.

yea, being a vampire svcks alot (pun intended) when it comes to the upkeep of preventing it from getting to stage 4, lucky i learned lydia still loves ya even if you reach that, so i park her somewhere with a bed and no other npc's around a lot of the time and if i hit stage four i just order her to get in the bed and snack on her....how she is not a vampire herself by now eludes me....

another funny thing that happened when i first started this character i was in whiterun chopping wood so i could sell them to the bartender at the bannered mare, i got around 300ish logs and was very over encumbered, so i creep my way into the into the bar to sell my logs and when i get to her and try to talk to her, i accidentally steal a wooden plate from her! the guards rush in and i decide to pay my bounty of 5 gold and they take me all the way to dragonsreach, so i drop all the logs and hold X to carry them outside my inventory and walk back to the inn, drop the logs and put then in my main inventory so i can try to sell them again...

once inside it turns out that the [censored] hired some thugs to "teach me a lesson" about what she does to thieves....guess that wooden plate really meant alot to her, so i quickly turn around and drop exit the and run...or i should say walk very slowly for my life, so i drop the logs and take unto fighting the thugs, whom proved to be an real challenge for me at this point of the game, i was playing a melee character and they hit hard, i take to using magic, which i had nothing put into magic, was still even at 100 magika, but I did come out victorious, but i wasn't able to find my logs.....i looked EVERYWHERE :swear:

"Hah! I'm finally going to beat this giant-- AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"


"Team rocket blasting off agaaaiiiiiin!" *distant sparkle*

http://www.gamesas.com/index.php?/topic/1294560-i-used-to-be-an-adventurer-like-you/page__view__findpost__p__19505339

I have had several but two recent ones standout. Not funny but great in terms of what they made me feel.

1. I was with Aela and we had just taken down a dragon. I love to hunt so as I spotted an elk I drew my bow. I was aiming and pulled back. Just when I was about to release, I heard someone behind me say "there you are." I turned and fired right into his chest. I will not say who it was because it will be a spoiler but here is what happened. He went down. Aela left me. Yes, I saw the "your follower has left your service" message. She left me in digust. He gets up and starts attacking me. I sheath my bow and back away. It truly was an accident and I hope he will disengage. Nope. He keeps attacking me. Aela then starts attacking him. She eventually kills him. I am in shock and truly ashamed at all that has happened. I ask her to follow me again and she does but I swear she had a disapproving look on her face. Whatever that guy was about to say will remain a mystery.

2. On my same character above, I had made it a point to not hurt or fight Giants. I am a Bosmer and have felt like an outcast all my life. I truly believe Giants are misunderstood and wrongly discriminated against. So I stay out of their way and refuse any quest to kill them. Then it happens, I am asked to do something that of course puts me close to a Giant's camp. I groan thinking this may not end well. I take Lydia and go to the spot. I proceed to do the said something and begin to get attacked. Lydia is fighting them off as I continue when suddenly I hear a roar. I think not now - a dragon attack now. no!!!!!, But it was not a dragon. It was two mammoths and a giant. Lydia is kneeling. I finish my task and try to heal her but one of the mammoths is charging me. I now see the Giant and other one coming towards me. I run. Sorry Lydia but I am about to get crushed. I am near Whiterun and book it to a bridge. All three still are chasing me. I try to run in circles and get back to Lydia. If I can heal her and make her go to a safe spot maybe we both can survive. Nope, a third mammoth joins the others and they are on my tail. I then run to the whitewatch tower (not sure of exact name). One mammoth is still chasing me. I finally decide to kill it and then try to go back to Lydia. I do but then she shows up. I tell her to wait. I need to know if the Giant is still out to get me. I approach him slowly and yep he starts coming towards me. I run back towards....Lydia. Well, to end it all, she does what she does best. Defends me by attacking the Giant. He knocks her down so I have no choice. Bow drawn I keep shooting him while backing up. he gets a semi-whack in on me before my final arrow downs him. So much for my "no kill" Giant policy.

I use Unrelenting Force on a citizen and got no bounty at all was way cool felt like the boss.

I came upon a crypt with a distraught nord outside. Apparently some evil necromancer went into his ancestral tomb and was defiling his relatives corpses. I agreed to help him rid the place of evil. He joined me, using his one handed axe and shield. He was pretty good at cleaving things with the axe!

Along the way, he would banter on about his relatives. Pretty funny lines sometimes. In the end we fight in a large chamber against the necromancer, his wraith, A Dreugh Overlord and a ton of skeletons. It was a mayhem of magic and splintered bone and blood that went on for a few minutes, all the while. this axeman is screaming murderous cries while he cleaves the undead. It was a really intense few minutes.

We converge on the Overlord, felling him together in a rain of blows. The din in the room fades, and we can now only hear our breaths, a nearby brazier, and the wind howling through the crypt.

I talk to him, to see what he has to say now that the threat has been removed. He says to me: "I have things that need doing..... but... go ahead."

I almost fell of my chair.

Last night was either a "good" night or a "bad" night, depending on your point of view.

1. Heading into Dragonsreach to chat about home improvements, dropped the controller, made a mid-air grab at it and Fus-Ro'd (I don't have Dah yet) the guards hanging around on the platform just outside the door. They didn't like it.

2. Went into the bear cave near Ivarstead. The bear in there looked a little grumpy, so I tried out "Throw Voice". I hear me shout something like, "Hey! Ugly!" and the bear went straight up into the ceiling! I walked over to where he had been and he suddenly dropped in front of me, so a few whacks with a battle-ax took care of him. Looking up, there was like a ventilation shaft going up and out of the ceiling of the cave. I guess Mr. Bear took a shortcut to find whoever was damaging his self-esteem.

3. This may be a normal thing, but last night was the first time I saw it--fighting a dragon and he's doing the land/take-off/land/take-off thing. i'm doing damage to him with arrows and all of a sudden, he makes a low-level approach right near me and crash lands, plowing up a big long trench in doing so. He was able to get up, so a good landing, technically. it was pretty impressive, though.

This was a glitch on Delphine while we're heading to kill some dragon and it was as if the bottom half of her body just turned 90 degrees horizontally and so it looks like she was running "sideways" the whole time! LOL
Cracked me up so bad! LOL Wished I took a screenshot of this..

I had something very similar but the dragon didn't survive the landing. It was pretty cool to see that it plowed a big rut in the terrain.

So I was heading to Whiterun for the first time coming straight from riverwood. As I got closer to the city I saw a small group of (what I thought) bandits that later turned out to be the companions skirmishing a giant. I thought nothing of it as I was eager to check the city out first. So I went in and got on with my business and eventually had to head out of town.

On my way out I saw the very same group of companions coming back to town and behind them... the very same giant (this is near the carriage that takes you to different towns) with the top half of his body buried into the ground, just his legs sticking out. I just looked back at the companions and lol'd out loud.

I play an Orc, using dual axes and heavy armour. I recently had a very funny thng happen to me (at least, I thought it was funny). I was headed into a dungeon, and there were a pair of bandits waiting outside. I charged right at them, and while I was dealing with one, the other, who was standing behind me, shouted something along the lines of "I'm going to take your head off and...!". Before he could finish the threat, and tell me what he was going to do with my severed head, I spin around, and with a single swipe of one of my axes, I take his head clean off. I was laughing so hard I couldn't keep playing. The only thing I thought would be better is if you could loot skulls or similar from the bodies. I would have mounted that one above my fireplace

I was about to kill some horkers when a snow sabre cat killed them. I was laughing because it was random. I then went to kill the cat. As soon as I shoot him with an arrow he bolts. He swam across a lake, and up a mountain. I felt like a BA because he is afraid of me. :disguise:

where's the [censored] like button in this biatch

I just had an NPC conjuror reanimate a chicken during a fairly epic battle. "Um, thanks for the help... I think." The battle was so fast paced, I didn't notice if the necro-chicken actually did any thing, but hey, it survived the fight.