So I've started dating this one girl, and I mean she's great, but she doesn't text nearly as much as other girls do. Normally I would say, you know "cool, someone unique" but I'm used to texting girlfriends alot throughout the day, and with past girlfriends, if they don't respond, 90% of the time that would mean that I had apparently said something out of line, or done something wrong. Now, with this girl, i mean there will be random, inconsistent patches throughout the day where she won't even have her phone on her, especially since she's in soccer, and doing driver's ed behind the wheel thing, so there will be moments where it's like we're texting and texting, and then blank, nothing from her for as long as 3 - 4 hours at a time. And from all my past experiences I keep getting worried, I keep asking myself, 'what did I do? what did I say? is she mad at me? why isn't she talking to me?'.

Anyone have any suggestions for coping with this?

....That's a bad thing?

People could have relationships just fine before cell-phones introduced obsessive texting.

Get used to it is the best advice I can give. :shrug:

Sounds like there's not much you can do about it if there are things she has to do during the day that prevents her from texting you. In fact, you should be happy that that's the reason why, that way you don't have to worry about whether it's because you did something wrong or not.

In my experience, you either have the text all the time girls or the kind of girls your describing. Your answer is this: Don't put any weight on texting anymore. If you said something out of line, or anything else you could discern from texting or the lack of, then it doesn't need to be said or not said through a text. If ever she were to get mad at you for something she tried to communicate through texting or the lack of, then tell her she needs to be consistent if shes going to start doing that.

Ok, but you obviously didn't get what I was getting at. I've gotten used to it, with all my previous relationsships, no response through texting = bad thing, and with this girl, I keep getting worried about it because there are several times a day where she won't text back for long periods of time because of stuff going on in her life. I obviously can't control what she chooses to do with her free time, but it would be nice to not worry every time she doesn't text back

Why are you so insecure? She's already going out with you. Relax and enjoy the piece and quiet.

I think it is a good thing that you have a girl that isn't a phone zombie. And my advice is to not worry as much

Well I personally believe that direct communication is the best kind of communication, whether it be a phone call or face to face. This would fix the problems you are talking about because you would usually be able to tell where your conversations landed with each other. Direct communication can be a much more intimate thing than texting which gives you the chance to basically slave over the words you choose and never have a non-rehearsed conversation. Just my two cents.

you are freaking out since shes not texting much???? really????

dont freak out. it aint a big deal and if you got used to phone zombies, then you can get used to this one.

Hehe...yep. This is the correct answer. When I was in high school nobody had a cell phone. I don't think anyone even had a car phone. :laugh:

If you trust her then there's no reason to worry, right? It sounds a bit creepy that you need to know what she's doing 24/7, is that what kids are like these days? :unsure:

Dude its not a big deal. I dont even have a cell phone, so I cant even text people. Its not a problem, if its causing such mental strain then maybe you should be dating one of those girls who is on you 24/7 and [censored]es at you for just a tiny little thing.

Holy [censored] 3 or 4 hours. How has your brain gone for so long without a text message. Your brain must be atrophying or something. Interesting to note, where's Veeno when needed. Interesting hypothesis. Some peoples brains linked to the frequency and duration of cell phone calls. Taking this away from them could possibly lead to a lack of some sort of nutrition and shortly there after death. Veeno would know more. I recommend NOT letting the cellphone out of your hands. Or if it must be kept out of sight, feel it in your pocket and take it out on occasion for your own health. Call it precious if needed. Just for the love of god don't stay away from it for extended durations. You could be in serious trouble. Correlation to girlfriend is unlikely, you more than likely miss the phone.

Nah, you should be freaking out. She could be texting other guys! She could be texting so many other guys that it takes that 3 hours to do so and she doesn't have time for you. I don't know what to tell you man.

I can understand if you just started to go out (just a few dates) and they didn't reply, that you would be worried because I'm a bit the same way, but this seems like you two have gotten pretty far into the relationship, so don't worry. Be happy that she has outside interests and doesn't want to spend every minute texting or talking to you. I honestly don't know how people do relationships where they are constantly texting. This question comes off really needy and clingy too, so just chill out a bit man.

Can I take a guess and say that you're in high school still?

Nah she's probably texting other girls to find out how to make yummier sammiches for him :hehe:

OP,

My advice, and I do so hope you take it, chill out

I wouldn't worry, the world doesn't revolve around a cell phone. :biggrin:

A girl that isnt clingly, constantly requiring some form of contact. Sounds amazing.

I spent nearly 2 years awaiting letters from my hubby to arrive across the ocean that sometimes took two weeks to get anything then I would get 8 or 10 at once. He awaited mine. There were no cell phones, internet, text....only the letters and an rare phone call from some port somewhere with a bad connection.

I'm not sure how we survived it.

People are different. It was basically the same thing in reverse with my past girlfriend. She would text me constantly, but I leave my cellphone at home or leave it dead for a while. As long as when you get face-to-face time she isn't POd, I'd say there's nothing wrong here.

Here's what you do:

1. Talk to her about it, and ask her to tell you good bye when you're in the middle of a conversation and she's about to go do something else.
2. Stop being paranoid.

Everything that's wrong with my generation.

Lucky bastard - I for one wouldn't want to be on the phone with my girlfriend 24/7

I think it's great to have some time for yourself without having to write someone all the time, I just don't feel that need. So I don't think you got nothing to worry about, just enjoy it.
Then when you do have some times together it's gonna be great, because you've been "saving up" for those moments right?

Couldn't agree more with this. If you're going to constantly be in touch with whoever you're dating throughout the day, the relationship can start wear out very quickly.

Listen to the advice you've already been given here. It's a positive thing.

this. Give her space dude. Seriously. My girl friend used to think the same thing if I didn't test back right away. I just wanted space, but she wouldn't giv it to me. I finally just had to tell her that.

To cope. Do something that will take your mind off of it. Or put your dang phone somewhere where you won't answer it. I am 19 and I hate cell phones. they svck. I used to have so much more peace without a cell phone, and now I am constantly getting texts and random calls from people that somehow got my number.... growl....