I still have yet to receive the note via the courier that tells me I can purchase property. I did get the one that says "consider adoption" but I could care less about that crap.

Is there some prerequisite that needs to be done before getting a deed to a house?
I have yet to help many of the Jarls, idk if that has anything to do with my situation.

So let me know if there is a quest I need to do or something.

Only one Jarl sends a note: Falkreath. At level 9.

If you are over level 10 and have not received the letter, check if you have any special fetch type quests left undone in the journal. The courier's letter takes the place of the fetch the mead quest for the Jarl of Falkreath, you can only have one of those quests at a time, which can prevent you getting the couriers letter.

You do not need a letter to buy the land from the other holds, and you can always take some mead with you when visiting Falkreath and see if he will ask anything of you. You have to do the the usual quests for the Jarl that are part of becoming Thane in order to buy the land. The quests never changed.

Ok, let me see if I understand.
I need to do the Jarls tasks In order to be able to buy the land?
As of now I still have not met with any Jarls besides in Whiterun.

So basically I need to become a thane before its possible to build a house?

No, you just need to introduce yourself to the Jarl and see if there is anything you can do to help the hold. You also have to do the three help the people quests if you want to be Thane. Usually I think the Jarl will have two quests for you, although for one hold it could only be one. You are not going to be buying any land in Whiterun, you will have to go to the Jarl's in Dawnstar, Morthal and Falkreath if you want a chance to buy land.

You do not need to become thane to buy the land but DO in order to have your housecarl Rayya appear at Lakeview for Falkreath. For this reason I am going to do those thane quests before building Lakeview. You can have her become your steward or bring in another steward if you want. I personally am going to try another steward as it gives greater protection over the homestead. Something to remember. Some stewards are very slow in furnishing the houses but that won't matter since I prefer to furnish the house myself.