Just a nice, fun topic.
What would happen if your character was interviewed? (doesn't have to be your Skyrim character, you might be using the same character as in Morrowind or Oblivion, like me)
The Interview can be at any point during his/her life (before Dragonborn, hell even before Morrowind if you want). You can make up the questions and answers yourself.

Please put your interviews in SPOILER TAGS so there isn't a huge amount of scrolling.

Have fun.

Me: Hello good sir how are you?

Oblivion Character: ...

Me: Okay then... wait where you go?

*is shot in the head with an arrow*

What did you do in a former life to get so lucky to be in a TES game?

No comment... :ninja:

me:so hey whats up...HOW IN THE NAME OF THE NINE DID YOU GET WHOOPED BY A RAT AT YOU SKILL LEVEL

Urgak-gro-shurnag :it was a tough rat.

me: but its a rat just smoosh it with your hammer

Urgak-gro-shurnag: i tried it didnt work

me: then why didnt you run you idiot

Urgak-gro-shurnag: only cowards run

me: :I....im leaving

some random interviewer was found dead because he saw the face of my assassin char when he tried to talk to him...

"Haha! Thats great! How's it go again?"

Me: Alright so let's get this interview on the road!

*both walk into room*

Seconds later:

*I burst out of the room, covered in flames* AAAAAAAGGHHHHH!!!!

Fire Mage: Hmm, here use this "hose" device.

Me: AAHH! AHHHH! *sprays self* *flames become bigger, entire body at this point is burning* AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Fire Mage: Well darn, that didn't help, did it? *glances at canister of gasoline to which the hose was connected* *trollface*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkSFIWzi7aA&feature=related

She would tell you nothing, and would kill you when you turned to leave just in case her face gave anything away...

Everyone here sounds like :ninja: 's.
Now I know too much. I'll just walk away slowly. (I feel like Glarthir)

On a cold, windy mountian top on the borders of Skyrim, a young Argonian whose skin is black as the void and red as the dawning sun gaces upon the vast tundra opening before his eyes. He draws a long breath of the wintery air and closes his eyes. A crack of a frozen branch behind him cathces his attention and he turns around to greet the first human he has seen in these parts. He's a huge nord warrior with hands the size of frying pans and 8 feet tall. He gives the young Argonian hunter a smile and walks up to him.
"Mighty beautiful day it is to gace upon the fjords of Skyrim", he explains without the smile leaving his face, "what brings a cold-blood to these heights on a cold day such as this?"
The Argonian turns his eyes towards the tundra once more. "The reason I'm here for, is to get to the other side", he gives the nord a smile, "hopefully without losing any more body parts to this damn cold", he points at the lack of his tail with a sad face, "I froze that one a couple of days ago, didn't realize it would be this cold out here". The nord looks horrified as he just realizes the Argonian is actually missing his tail, but relaxes as the Argonians face turns into a smile again. "It's not like I need the tail anyway, I bet the lakes of Skyrim are all frozen anyway!". The nord gives away a huge laugh and the two of them start walking down the tundra."My name by the way is Hjalfil the Big-hand, what should I call you?" To which the Argonian replies, "You probably couldn't pronounce my Black March name anyway, so you can call me Froze-His-Tail." "Well then, Froze-His-Tail, I give you a welcome to Skyrim, we just crossed the borders and we are in my homeland!"

Edit: I realize that's not an interview per ce, but my Argonian cannot be interviewed in any other way

Me: So, How did your adventure begin?

Norman: I was in prison, and the Emperor came to use an escape route in my cell.

Me: Why would the emperor have an escape route out of the city in one of the prison cells. Why not the Imperial palace?

Norman: I don't know, I'm not a city planner.

Me: Why did the Blades let a convict follow them through the escape when they could have just put you in the next cell?

Norman: Because the emperor saw my face in a dream.

Me: I see...

"First off, I want to say thanks to all my Adoring Fans. They made good target practice."

Absolute Win :lmao:

The character from Oblivion I had visits Skyrim.

May I have a moment of your time?.
Cheese dribbles in arcane maners, slipping through the time tight that thunk and Kniht.

Thank you sir, this is just a quick poll of current trends.
Gribble the garble, gibble he jaber, hold the haughty by their.. our hutches.

So you think that the citizens of this fine land spend too much time on introspective thinking?
Nay, nay, hay horses have taken my nanna's banana's.

If I may have one more moment of your time sir.
Surely don't call me sunderland, alice.

In aid of the Skyrim Dragon fund would you care to give your Cyrodiilic bank details for direct debit charity dotations?
Giant hamsters have forsaken me, taking my wallet to go to wheel shaped strip joints, it's ok though I have your nose.

Just need your name good sir?
Sheogorath, or is it oCC, or CoC, I forget where I put my slippers good elk.

Interviewer: "Excuse me! Sera Venim! Could I get a quote for the news-sheets, tomorrow?"

Kiion Venim: "Hm? Oh, certainly! Certainly! Here... step inside, I'll show you to my office."

Interviewer: "So, Serjo... I wanted to ask you, are the rumors true? Did you own Uncle challenge you to a duel to keep you from becoming Archmaster of House Redoran?"

Kiion Venim: "Oh, it's about that..."

Interviewer: "I understand you must be getting this question a lot... but you've not yet said anything officially. People are curious as to what precisely transpired."

Kiion Venim: "He challenged me to a duel, to the death. He spat upon my father's honor... and challenged my worthiness as his successor. He fought with every intent to kill me... but ALMSIVI was on my side, this day. I understand that, right now, Tamriel is in an uproar... and all sorts of rumors are going around... but you've heard it here, now, from my lips. Bolvyn Venim was stuck in the old ways. So scared of change and progress was he, that he would slay his own blood and curse the name of his brother. He died a disgrace... and no amount of heroism portrayed earlier in his life can wash that shame from him now. In these dire times... unity is the only thing that will keep the Dunmer alive... and I have vowed to work with the remaining members of the surviving Houses to ensure that we, as a people, do not become the refugees of Tamriel."

Interviewer will be in bold.

Madam Aurelie! Madam Aurelie! I don't suppose you could spare a few minutes to answer a few of my questions for the Anvil News?
Of course you may, dear friend, however, Madam Aurelie was my mother. Call me Helena. What is it you'd like to know?

Many thanks, Helena. The inhabitants of Anvil have never been healthier thanks to the local Mages Guild Hall specializing in Restoration. But it seems you're not satisfied with leaving it at that, are you?
You are quite correct. I admire Carahil's work here, and I can only dream of accomplishing the things she has, but dreams are what make life worth living, and what use are they if you won't chase them? It's to this end that I intend to set up the first Hospital in Cyrodiil, and quite possibly all of Tamriel. Yes, the Chapels of the Nine provide healing, as does the Mages Guild, but they cost money. What about the poor beggar on the street who has a badly infected wound from fending off rowdy drunks? He can't afford to pay the Mages Guild, or the Chapel for healing. In fact, most would kick him off their doorstep. This can't continue

So it seems you're embarking on a rather noble quest then. But what about your obvious ties with the Mages Guild? Surely they won't be happy with you taking away their monopoly on Healing? Not the mention the Chapels.
Of course, when I mentioned my idea to one of my professors at the Arcane University, they laughed in my face and said I could never do it. Not without their support, and I was sure they wouldn't give me any. But the Guild makes enough money selling spells, enchantments and alchemy supplies. A small cut in revenue won't make much of a difference, and anyway, the upper classes will still go to Guild or Chapel for Healing, rather than having to brush shoulders with "lower class scum". Carahil supports my idea, though, and I think it will work. The Chapels? If they're concerned with money, well, Nirn is becoming a far worse place than I imagined. I go to the Chapel to pray, not to make money off the needy. The very fact that they charge for Healing makes my blood boil.

Thank you for your time, Helena Aurelie. I wish you the best of luck in the future.
You're welcome, friend, and thank you.


--------------------

That was actually really fun to do. I might have to have another go later with a couple of my other characters. But Helena always comes first.

"Hey there, what's it like living in Tamriel?"

Did you hear the one about the Orc in a party dress?

"What?"

I could easily cut your throat before you can react.

"What the hell?"

Did I tell you about the time I ran errands for the emperor's son?

"Are you schizophrenic?"

You don't look too bad yourself.

"Yeah...I think I'm out of here."

Interviewer: Sooo, who are you?

Kerris: Kerris Vinchis... Champion of Cyrodiil...

Interviewer: How did you earn that title

Kerris: Killed some red, 8m tall fatty with four arms....

Interviewer: Riggghtt? Off the topic, were you on Skooma?

Kerris: I'll answer your question with an question of my own...

Interviewer; Okaaay???

Kerris: Do you want an arrow in your throat?

INTERVIEWER: Good evening sir.

ME: Hey.

INTERVIEWER: So, you've become pretty famous around these parts. What important things have you done lately?

ME: Well, I'm the champion of Cyrodiil, the Hero of Kvatch, the Arena Grand Champion, the Arch Mage, the Listener for the Dark Brotherhood, the Gray Fox, I own estates all around Cyrodiil, I murder people on a regular basis and own every legendary weapon in Tamriel. Oh yeah, I'm also the Daedric Prince of Madness. *returns to twiddling thumbs*

INTERVIEWER: Wow. You certainly seem... rather busy. Do you have a lot of duties to attend to?

ME: Nah, not really.

INTERVIEWER: Ah, okay, well, you must have come from a noble heritage.

ME: No, I was a prisoner and the Emperor saw my face and made me find his heir.

INTERVIEWER: Oh, well, what were you in jail for?

ME: How should I know that?

Pfft... I'm bored of writing this. Whatever.

"Kiss my Axe!"

Afterwards ...

"Well that's one less bothersome idiot."