The same can be said of anything; if you're new at something, odds are good you will be bad at it. Downright crappy, even. This is not a good reason to put padding over everything, however. I don't want ALL bicycles to be required to have training wheels because some people need them. I don't want all books to become children's books so that everyone can pick up and read any book out there if they're still learning to read.
The problem with making something that can be toggled is that it almost requires only a surface level of depth. If I want to toggle, say, whether lava hurts you, they have to go back and look at any areas with it to make sure the balance isn't being completely screwed up. Or, on topic, toggling the quest compass in Oblivion would be awkward because it only leaves you with unhelpful directions. If an option can be toggled, it was never necessary or very influential. In many cases I'd rather have a single option in which effort has been invested to make it an actual, substantial game mechanic. Saying something should be a toggled option is, itself, more or less deciding how other people should play. Odds are good that it's deciding the feature can't be used to the extent the other side wanted.
What? Why are we assuming that Bethesda is so incompetent that they can't write good NPC directions while also having optional quest markers? Plenty of other games have managed it, there's no reason that Bethesda couldn't. As for it being "necessary," no it isn't. But, again, there are plenty of features in the game that aren't necessary. Heck, why do we even have difficulty sliders? Does other players' ability to, heaven forbid, decrease the game's difficulty affect your enjoyment? Does the existence of that feature lessen your experience?
The simple fact is that many people do NOT enjoy having to play hide and seek with quest objectives, either because they flat out don't like that kind of gameplay or they're new to gaming in general. Games are more complicated than ever these days and it's a shame that any time a developer tries to accomidate the newcomers they have to deal with the so called "hardcoe" crowed calling them out on it. Where exactly do you expect new gamers to start, if not your beloved "hardcoe" game? Does it make any sense at all for a developer to alienate potential players based on how experienced they are, especially when it's all focused on a feature that could easily made into something that's toggleable instead of forced?
And saying that something being optional is an infringement on another player's play style is so wrong it's unbelievable. If one side doesn't want it then all they ahve to do is not use it. Bad ingame directions is its own issue and should be independant on the exitence of quest markers when talking about any competent game developer. The only time it'll be an issue is when the developers get "lazy," in which case we'll have
far more problems in the game than this.
Your children's book comparison is also far off. We're not talking about toning down the game's content or censoring the subject matter, we're talking about an optional toggle to make it easier for people to find quest objectives. That doesn't even come close to making the game into the gaming equivilent of a children's book.
The closest thing I've seen to an actual argument for why it shouldn't be ingame as a toggleable option is the whole "the ingame directions will suffer" thing, yet since other developers of quest based games with their own "quest marker system" have managed to maintain good quest directions, this really isn't something worth worrying about as long as you still trust Bethesda to make a quality game.
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edit:
Exactly.
A good game is one that you have to invest time into and master.
A bad game is one that anyone can beat in a week after just picking it up.
A creative game is one that takes you off guard and makes you learn the unique mechanics and style before you can get good at it.
A hackneyed game is one that anyone who is used to the generic FPS controls and gameplay can jump into and master in less than an hour.
IMO, of course.
Fun fact: Portal was one of the first games my grilfriend ever played that wasn't a 2D platformer (and the first with a first person perspective), and she beat it in about 14 hours play time (stretched across about 5 days). Is that one creative and unique enough for you?