Least I know that I could continue going without worrying if this is bad.

:E

Of course. Internet cold ones all around! :foodndrink: Props to Night Hawk for starting the whole thing, props to Boradam for continuing it with a funny fan fic, and small props to me for making a slighly witty post. :celebration:

I'm actually going to use bits of your post.

It is like the most perfect piece of cake, but one that is too large to eat.

I wander what pillar of masculinity cried. You sir are awesome sauce.

Most likely Mr. Old Spice.

"Hello, Ladies..."

Awesome B)

I feel validated now.

I want to shed manly tears, but noooooooo, all my tears are female and gave birth to more female tears which gave birth to even more female tears.

True story, but enough of this sugary silly goodness, I'm going to add another chapter this night or tomorrow... it all depends if I drink more alchohol. :sadvaultboy:

Hilbo lay shocked and scared with a case of soiled pants, the man and woman and man... and dog, he had saw earlier on.

"They torched Ian! But in the midst of them torching him I somehow became able to speak clearly and normally, and have reached a higher plane of intelle-"

The man had a face that was such a facey face of face to the point that he somehow became a blankfaced man, but Hilbo never mentioned it.

"BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK,"

"What's that boy? You want me to shoot him? OKAY!"

"BARKBARKBARKBARKBAAAAAAAAARK,"

"Oh, you want me to go to that thing over there, okay!"


The man was still in a Blue Suit and he went to a circular piece of both witchcraft and magic.

"WORK DAMN YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU! omgydunuwukustupidmacin- o noe, wat i do tu voic,nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu"

The man in a Gas Mask and Leather Armor proceded to beat the man with the butt of his gun, until he screamed "Stop it!" correctly, and not scream "gadammetmanastaaaaaawp". It was a strange sight indeed and I am sure Hilbo will never forget it. When the pinata-esqe beating ended the Blue Suited Man tried to harness the power...

Hilbo decided he didn't want to wait and watch so he went to the third floor for no apparant reason.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Meanwhile outside the Vault:

A Great Battle was about to take place from the four corners of Los Angeles, Men and Mutant, Ghoul and Creature all marched to try and take the Vault once stories of Hilbo Haggins, Forin Soakenfield, Sto-in, Glowin, Bawlin, Bail-in, Bit-ur, Kilin, Feelien, Brokur, Doo-ring, Bomb-ur, Snorin, Sori, and Sandalf...


For no reason everyone in the group (Save for Sandalf) burst out into song!

For-ward we maaarch, into end-less dark where the dead and the mys-ter-ies lie...
To the end of roads, we shall croak like toads,
So now they will hear us diiiie, but into the dark we goooo.

To the end of age, they will hear us say,
"We march to the end-less daaaaaaark,"
So out we march, to the endless dark, because that's where men have diiii-ed,

We will stride, and we will ride, onward to thee end-less daaaaaark...
The World will si-igh, when can-not die, continue to end-less daaark,
We march to end-less daaaark,
Weeee maaaaaarch noooooooooooow!"

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

I was going to finish the Hobbit spoof with this post, but that will have to be later today.
Sorry if the post is messy.

My stomach...It hurts...

Not from vomiting I hope.

New formats! Yaaaaaay!

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Last time on Lord of the Chip...


For-ward we maaarch, into end-less dark where the dead and the mys-ter-ies lie...
To the end of roads, we shall croak like toads,
So now they will hear us diiiie, but into the dark we goooo.

To the end of age, they will hear us say,
"We march to the end-less daaaaaaark,"
So out we march, to the endless dark, because that's where men have diiii-ed,

We will stride, and we will ride, onward to thee end-less daaaaaark...
The World will si-igh, when can-not die, continue to end-less daaark,
We march to end-less daaaark,
Weeee maaaaaarch noooooooooooow!"

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

After the pointless random singing, Sandalf put a palm to his head and wanted to yell a yell that would echo a yell for many yelling eons. That is one loud yell I assure you...
From Adytum and various other places in the Boneyard: Men marched from gates and ruined homes armed with weapons such as rippers and magic sticks that emit a loud bang when a certain piece is tugged, but they marched a march and sang a wonderfully random song of randomnessy randomness. (As you see, I tend to put 'examply example of exampling exampleness' quite often)

From the sewers and tunnels, caves and dirt, and many other dark dirty places had emerged many strange beasts and cruel, foul, twisted creatures: Mutants... They crawled out screaming, shrieking, yelling, groping pushing, dragging, and hording...

Out of Derpwood emerged emerged ghouls which had gone into hiding, running and tripping, falling and being unable to get up, and losing skin while they run, and other ghouly things that they do... Hilbo was lucky, because even though he was a ghoul- he had skin that remained a bit, though he had gotten somewhat shorter than mot ghouls save for the ones in his small town (as it was a natural thing, you see)

Finally, out of the desert emerged the Egils, a tribe of Wizardy typed wizards who had small verisons of Sandalfs staff, that made petew sound and shot red beams of magical light which if touched; burns the living hell out of all things that could be burned and melted, as it would kill you and somehow make you a pile of ash or split your body in half...

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

"Three dice for the Tribal-kings under the sky,
Seven card decks for the Ghouls in their halls alone,
Nine treaties for Politicans doomed to die,
One Chip for House in his dark home,
In the Land of Vegas where the Shadows lie.
One Chip to rule them all, One Chip to find them,
One Chip to bring them all and in the darkness, bind them."

"Istealdore! Isteeaaaaaaaldore!"

He walked away from his former friend, and he treasured the Chip he held in his hand. Walking away he decided to bring it back to the farmland, he showed it to his friend Dave who became furious as he frequently gambled but lost all his chips- that is until he saw the One Chip, which is exactly what he called it seeing that it was a singular object.

Dave and Istealdore traveled to a lake to fish, but Dave became enraged and nearly strangled Istealdore on the spot and had a little battle before Dave took the Chip when Istealdore lay unconcious (as murder was called as being silly.) Dave walked away from Istealdore with the Chip, and the next day the world blew up, and Istealdore never had the 'true' chip, but he had a coin with painted black and white checkers everywhere on it.

Dave survived in a half completed Vault, where he slowly became a trog... In the Vault they had an abundance of fish and soup and rice, but the soup machine was broken with a sign labeled on it saying

NO SOUPZ FO' YU!

Enraged by this, Dave beat the machine violently with a frozen fish and began to eat the fish when they thawed... His teeth all fell out when he tried to eat a frozen fish and he could no say 'Ave' in Dave he yelled "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMS!" which was a swear word where he came from, eventually he just merged D and Ollum together and made Dollum. As a trog, he survived for a hundred additonal years where he became a crazy ass mother [censored] pyschopath who murders any fish that tries to enter his fishing cave to eat his Precious Gambling Chip...

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Hilbo went into the Third floor, saw a giant blobby mass and immediantly turned tail and emerged from the Vault in the sewer pipe, everyone save for Sandalf and Hilbo had gone to fight over the Cathedral as they knew a vault (which oddly, everyone somehow originated from) lay under...

Forin Soakenfield, Sto-in, Glowin, Bawlin, Bail-in, Bit-ur, Kilin, Feelien, Brokur, Doo-ring, Bomb-ur, Snorin, and Sori all fought like brave tribals who emerged as heroes where they saved the world and killed everyone else with a string of floss and a single toothpick like cowards and ended up shooting each other mistakenly...

"Good lord, do these fools ever learn?"

Hilbo had heard Sandalf utter those words, and Sandalf turned around and started to walk back into the Desert.

"Sandalf? Sandalf where are you going?"

"Away, and it will be wise for you to do the same. My tale does not end here and your legacy will not do so either."

"But... but Sandal-"

"FLY, YOU GHOUL!"

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Intermissio-

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


KA-BOOM!


There was an explosion.

There was a crater.

There were no surviors.

The story ended.

This is one of the greatest things I've ever read. I've never laughed this hard before. (or ever)

The Hobbit is finished, the Lord of the Rings spoof is to start soon, it will be more serious though... Seriously funny. (at least, I hope so.)

Great job...Have not finished yet but so far so awesome!!! Keep it up! Also are you going to put the next movie on this same forum page?

Yes, I'm actually going to start on it today as I have nothing to do.

Actually, I'm going to request a mod to lock this and will make a new thread as it will be alot simpler.

Locked per OP request.