I play Altmer with the Antronach sign. I used specilization of Stealth instead of magic because those would be levled up anyways. I love using bows, so this increases my bow and short sword to help me in the begining.
I haven't really gotten to do any Solstiem (yeah I spelt it wrong too.
) so not sure what you mean about your own spells killing you. I guess that would mean there is lots of reflect magika. Well having the Antronach sign, you get to absorb 50% of those reflected back at you, ( could be wrong, just restarted playing again) so maybe more more absorbing spells to combine with the Antronach. Sorry not much help there.
I love being an Altmer, makes the begining game more harder because of the weakness to magika, and when you finally get those buffs to resit, it's not so strong because of our weaknesses it makes us average or normal then. I did the Breton Antronach once, and it was so boring around level 20, I ended up giving up because it was too easy. Now I find it now so easy with Altmer and Antronach sign, very fun for me.
So easy to regenerate magika, but ask in spoilers or PM me is you need help there. I leave armour as a misc skill, I just find the other skills I use more usefull and funner.
I never used staves (or is it staffs?) so that is something different. I use long sword because I am playing like a Jedi type character, who uses a giant sword, but loves to use magika as force powers.