No Mans Land

Preface

The wastelands were silent, the sky's lingering in the darkness of the gray clouds that rose from the explosions. A battle had raged for the last three days, sacrificing the many men of war, and slaughtering the innocent of the near by towns. In the war lands two factions refused to allow the other to prosper, breath, live. These factions created one of the wastelands greatest wars and were known as the HellHounds and the RisingSuns.
HellHounds were stocky, powerful men and lean, energetic women, who devoted there lives to slave trading and the training of large, black dogs to fight in there many battles. They would wear black and red cloth wrapped around there entire body from head to toe only revealing there eyes and fingers. Over top of there fine cloth suits they would strap metal plates to there chest, arms, and legs making a cheap armor. These men were killers, and any man who would step in there way would be burnt alive in the very spot. There leader Vixen Hex was a spiteful women who lost her parents to a Raider attack in her small childhood village were she was an innocent, shy child. After the attack she found rage, anger, and spite entered her heart and formed her into the war lord she is today.
RisingSuns began as a peaceful group of farmers, and traders who came together to make a village that could fully support themselves without the help of caravans or near by factions. They farmed the lands, scavenged the territory, built houses, and raised children. RavenValley was the chosen name for this small oasis and the people of the wasteland finally had a place that could and would make them happy. This all changed however the day the HellHounds had grown tired of been nobody's and attacked the RisingSuns, taking many, but killing more. Eden Aurora the leader of the RisingSuns became furious, he was a proud man and the attack on his land drove his mind to revenge. Several day's later the RisingSuns used there resources to find weaponry and armor, and with there skills it was not long before they were well stocked. Eden sent man after man in to battle slaughtering his own kind knowing full well his people were not trained for war. However his numbers prevailed and the last of his “soldiers” were able to take the HellHounds leaders life.
Years past and the two factions would attack each other over and over again never learning the mistakes of war. HellHounds would gain a new women leader who would teach them discipline and patients so they would be able to focus there power. The RisingSuns began to train becoming better soldiers and almost equals in war with the HellHounds but there numbers were still there power.
On the first day of there greatest battle Eden sent his soldiers south into the empty area in between the two factions, and Vixen replied by sending her soldiers north to fight back. This was the beginning of the battle of No Mans Land.

( Hope you guys liked it, but if not feel free to tell me why, I'm always open for Improvement.If you guys enjoy then leave a comment and Chapter One will be up as soon as possible)

It's a wall of text. Try spacing out the paragraphs.

Like so.

People don't like to read a wall of text as it scares some and others get lost in it.

Also, if the Rising Suns had captured the Hell Hound's leaders, wouldn't the Rising Suns be on the offensive by now? Ya know, keep defeating the hostile forces and not allowing them to regroup and reorganize. No leader, fueled on rage or not, would just throw up his hands and be like,

"We got their leaders. Good job. The rest? Who cares, let's go have a beer!"

No, he would hunt them down 'til the last was drowning in his own blood in the middle of a sun-blasted, life devoid desert with buzzards overhead. Especially if he is being fueled by rage.

A better way to have gone with this is by having the Hell Hounds on the run and fighting a guerilla war with the Rising Suns trying to flush them out and adapt to this new way of fighting their enemies. War is not always large lines of men and women charging at one another or having giant trench system stretching for miles. Especially when you have rifles and explosives. Those lines are gonna be shifting about every second with charges, retreats, flankings, etc.

However, as a Preface, I think that this is pretty good and I hope you continue it.

Well said.

But anyways, I'm judgeing this as a preface, and I think its pretty solid. Could use some improvement, but solid.

Other than that (and spacing as Front mentioned) this is a pretty solid preface. Just be careful with your wording.

Like in the first sentence, I do not believe that you need to make "wasteland" and "sky" plural.

Or how about this sentence


Which is redundant since rage and anger or basically the same thing and spite runs on parallel tracks. Maybe just rage and spite?

Just be careful for sentences like that, though as a preface, this is pretty good. Look forward to more.