Ooh! :read: I'm all warm and fuzzy. This was great. Your light touch of tongue in cheek and humor give just the right spice to this sweet story.

Yep. Fun! This is a perfect example of what I like about your stories. You take a simple event, lavish it with 'Rales' and render a short, brisk very fun read. Popping in for a visit with Rales. I love it! :goodjob:



'I gasped with the sight.' {I would recommend at vs with}

Argh! I missed these earlier! Both chapters are great, I had a moment's fear when she wasn't there, but remembered your three words so calmed down, lol. Awesome writing!




Yes I really think so, lol. It was absolutely a brilliant moment, and you should brag!

Two more riveting chapters!

It's difficult to critique your writing without ruining the wonderful turns of phrase that make Rales such an endearing character.

The re-write you've done here:

is better, but it still reads a bit awkward. Might I suggest,

'It took six or seven inquiries with various people before I finally learned that she would most likely be in the library which was down the hall on the right-hand side.

That's all I've got . . . wonderful storytelling as always, RemkoNL.

Thanks for the support and sharing your thoughts on sentences that seem awkward or just plain wrong. I find myself improving my grammar and punctuation because of you guys. THANKS!
I'll have an update next week and I've also decided to have a closer look at the last paragraph. I I I I I I.... bleh... How the hell did I miss that?

Argh! No new chapter?

My muscles relaxed and little pains that ached me, evaporated in the steaming water and underneath Zerina's soft, yet firm hands.
The bath was such a delight, I immediately made up my mind to have one constructed in our house as well, although not as big as this one. The water was lightly scented - I think it was lavender - but thankfully not too femine. We soaked in the calming bath, enjoying each other's company until our skin was wrinkled and the bottle of wine was empty.

Back in our room, still dripping and wrapped in a moist towel, Zerina insisted I donned my best clothes for the night; she had planned a dinner in a nice tavern she had come across while shopping.
'Do you think you're gonna need that?' she asked with a smile when I strapped Wretched ? my sword - around my waist.
'Good habits die hard,' I retorted and unbuckled the scabbard. When she turned around, facing the life-size mirror to do her hair, I slipped the gift into my left sleeve.

I had no idea where Zerina had bought my new robe, a dark green one with gold thread stitched in intricate patterns, but somehow she managed to find a better looking one every single time.
Not to mention the absolutely divine dress she was wearing that night; it almost seemed alive as the dark purple silk swirled around her legs when she moved. She appeared to be floating rather than walking.
I resisted getting down on my knees and thanking the gods for the happiness they had bestowed upon me.

The chique tavern Zerina had seen was in the Redoran Plaza, the level above the Waistworks, where "The Flowers of Gold" was located.
I was glad it was in the area, I had wandered through Vivec more than enough that day.
Half an hour later, we were seated at a table for two and each ordered a glass of expensive, imported wine. I never really acquired a taste for the local beverages, I retained my taste for Cyrodyliic wine and brandy.
The service was terrific. As soon as either of us emptied our glass, a waiter would be standing ready to refill it - if so desired.

We both ordered the same, a crabcocktail as an appetiser and roasted Netchmeat with fresh vegetables on the side as the main course. I wasn't sure what to expect but the cocktail was a lot more tasteful than what I called a "Rales Special", which basically was a Mudcrab I cast a fireball - just big enough to kill it ? at it so it was cooked while still in its shell. The first time had been an accident, I had meant to roast - proverbally speaking - a cursed flying rat behind it but my aim had been off so I hit the crab instead. Since I was starving, I still ate it even though I thought it had been burned to a crisp. I had been wrong; it turned out to be delicious. Even better than raw.

The Netch meat was very different from what I expected. To be quite frank, I would have chosen a different main course because floating Jelly Fish doesn't sound tasteful at all, but Zerina insisted I'd try it. The texture was similar to beef but it tasted sweeter, almost like venison. The dish came with a sauce that reminded me of the sauce that is usually served with game but slightly more bitter. When I inquired about the sauce, I learned it was made from Gomberries and sweetened with a dash of Moon-Sugar. The cook sure knew what he was doing.

During the coffee after dinner, I took the gift from my sleeve. When she opened the box her eyes were positively beaming and asked me where I had gotten it from. I made some vague remark about having taken it off the dead. With her toes she kicked me underneath the table while acting insulted. Some other customers looked at us in dismay when I suddenly let out an honest laugh in reaction to her act. The purple dress looked like it was made to be worn together with the necklace; a match made in heaven. Of course she persuaded me into telling the truth eventually. Her persuasion methods - involving plenty of kisses - had been worth the kick a thousand-fold.

The walk back to the suite took twice as long as it took to get to the restaurant. After our dinner, we had ordered a second bottle of wine- and a third.
Zerina fell on the bed face-first and slept almost instantly. I gently undressed her, taking care not to wake her up or to ruin her dress in the process, and tucked her in. With a semi-amused grin seeing her passed out like that I snuck into bed next to her. I remember thinking she was in for a rough night just before I dozed off into an alcohol-induced haze of blurryness.

Halfway the night, my final thought proved prophecy. I woke up to familiar noises coming from the privvy. Knowing exactly how miserable she must have felt, I only poured her a big cup of lukewarm water, put it on her bed-side table and left her alone. I stayed awake to comfort her once she'd return. I was no stranger to the symptoms and knew all too well what one usually wanted most after just having spewed one's guts out; a drink of water and warmth. But mostly sleep.
Pale as a sheet, she slumped back into the bedroom shivering, with a look on her face that had an accusing 'Why didn't you tell me?' written all over it.
Once back in bed she was glad to crawl snug-close to me to benefit from my body-heat and, luckily for her, slept through the rest of the night undisturbed.

Oh darn, it was the wine. I thought for a minute Rales Jr. was on his way !! ROFL - Great write, and I have to pull this line out because I roared laughing when I read it:

Funny you should say that; pregnanacy was what I had planned first actually but decided I wanted to keep that for another time. The kids know eachother for roughly 2,5 months, a bit too soon imo.
No kids until they're properly married

:read: I loved it! Remko, I continue to be amazed how you can turn normal activities into fascinating events. After all, this story delivered Rales' gift of course, but it revolved around a delicious bath and meal, followed by a not so delicious lesson in drinking too much wine. Yet, it is impossible to stop reading until done!

Again, what a joy to read! You have quite endeared your characters to me. :twirl:


Let me point out a couple 'editory' things that you might consider. In highlighting such things, I try to be sensitive to the unique style that is Rales, which in my opinion allows lots of latitude in word use. I also try to embrace the 'non-American' use of the language; most of my family is either Australian or British so I hope I don't incorrectly call anything to your attention for that.



each other's // skin, like hair can be used as a collective - that is you could have said 'our skin was wrinkled' if you wanted.



waist



refill // I would substitute the word 'it' for your second use of the word 'glass' but that is purely a style choice to reduce redundancy.



I would use main course without the hyphen.



I would change nothing here. 'Halfway the night' seems grammatically odd (although I am quite unsure here), but oh so poetic and delciously Rales.

Incredibly sweet, reading your latest installment puts a smile on my face. Now I will have to explain to my coworkers why I am so happy on a Monday.

I must confess that I too thought "morning sickness" when Zerina worshiped at the porcelain goddess. But it was only wine...


Now a nits:

Not to mention the absolutely devine dress

That ought to be divine.

@Acadian: Why, thank you! I left the sentence un-edited. After all, Rales is no grammar god Thank you for the other things. I changed my post according your helpful mentions.
@Sub Rosa: It seems Zerina and Rales have made their way into several reader's heart. What more could I want? Thank you for reading and putting a smile on my face. (not to mention the sense of pride that wells up in my chest....)

As they have been quite active, that may be hard to control. (edit my excessively long boring drivel out - and if you ask to see it, don't say I didn't warn you! Lol) - so how will they keep from producing?

I can't say it any better than this. Nice work!

Alchemy I suppose.
I am very aware of the inherent problems of their activity but haven't adressed the issue. Yet. I'll correct that error soon. Thanks!

I've been wondering, you may know female Dunmer have a different period than human women. From what I've read in the lore about that (Shades actually made some comments about that in fan-fic which basically got me thinking and reading about it) is that female Dunmer have have a prolonged menstruation cycle so might have longer periods of "infertibility".

As a sidenote; Yes, I would very much like to read your view (or excessively long drivel, as you call it) on it.

If they have sixual relations with a human, it brings on their cycle early and they can become pregnant quickly, you can read about that in "The Real Barenziah" - which was how Barenziah ended up pregnant with Tiber Septim's baby (but he made her abort it). If they only have six with their own kind, it takes forever for them, and they may or may not ever produce.

On my excessively long drivel:

I wrote a story (a long time ago) about a certain town back in the olden times; Children were said to be a "blessing from the Gods" then, and the Elders forbid birth control practices. They were being overwhelmed by overpopulation, and the citizens were sneaking, trying to find ways to control it in secret. The men started using the intestines of sheep pulled over themselves to keep their wives from getting pregnant, but found little satisfaction in the act this way - (for both parties) - so the men would use these only with their wives, but began sneaking around to the other wives in town (while their husbands were at work) to have unprotected six for the better enjoyment. The wives of these other men succumbed as well for the enhanced pleasure without the disgusting sheep intestines. All the wives got pregnant anyway, claiming to their husbands that the Gods were punishing them for trying to stop the "blessings" - so the town had an even bigger boom in population than they had originally, only every family's "get" looked like the neighbors instead of the father.

See? Didn't I warn you it was blatherings and excessively long drivel? ROFL !!!

That "could" explain why Zerina doesn't get pregnant too soon, they're both Dunmer after all. But you have given me some material to build on.


I think the sheep bladder as birth control was already in practice in ancient Egypt.
anyway; it would seem they found a good way to mix the gene pool :rofl:


That wasn't long.
Er, not sure. I think so but I'll check right away. So many nice new fan-fics have popped up lately I even missed Rach's update.

Nearing postlimit oo:


Day 124

As was to be expected, the next morning Zerina didn't feel her regular self. While I prepared my expedition to find an elusive Khajiit, she mumbled something about taking a bath and remaining there throughout the entire day. The day before I had already learned that even though the city looked beautiful from afar, there were filthy parts underneath - much like pretty flowers that grow best on manure. Underneath my armour I wore the oldest pair of trousers and shirt I had brought so the green robe wouldn't be reduced to a dirty rag.

Caius already informed me she would most likely be in the St. Olms canton so that narrowed down my search drastically. Especially if she would really still be there.
From the Redoran canton I took a gondola to the Temple, my feet still hurt from the day before. Zerina would be pleased I left my good robe in the suite; rain was pouring down in bucketloads. Within seconds after having gotten into the little vessel, I was soaked to my skin. From the Temple area I had to walk a little distance to the St. Olms Canton.
Looking back I had better could have gone walking, it would have been quicker. The bright side was that I got to see the splendour of Vivec' palace, High Fane - the pearl of the city.

From a book I once read, I knew Saint Olms the Just to be the one to have conceived and articulated the principles of testing, ordeal and and repentence. Two of those principles reflected my state of mind during my visit to the canton. I thoroughly repented being put through the ordeal of the Saint Olms canton. It was far dirtier than any other part of the city I had been. Probably because the Hlaalu that mainly lived there were too cheap to maintain it.

Hours in a row I meandered through the decrepit canton, looking for traces of the Khajiit when I came across an apothecary. Thinking that maybe I could concoct something against Zerina's inevitable headache and nausea I bought some basic apparatuses - I hadn't brought my own - and some ingedients for making a very special healing spell. Throughout my experiments I had learned by adding a very tiny part of an ingredient usually not used for that specific effect, the potion's effect would increase exponentially. Of course under the risk of creating a highly potent poison that would kill you instantly. Experience had taught me to recognise the colour and to be most wary of important details - like temperature - to brew it on to create something different altogether.

When I started putting ingredients together in the little workshop in his establishment, Vaval Selas almost interrupted by warning me about what I was doing but soon realised he wasn't talking to a novice but to a master. Intrigued, he grabbed a seat and watched me closely mashing, grinding, mixing and regulating temperatures.
With the heat of the boiling concoction and the heightened concentration that was absolutely vital with the brewing of the potentially lethal potion, I was bathing in sweat. I almost made the mistake of letting my mind wander off to the warm bath Zerina would now probably be in.
About two hours later, I was finally satisfied with the colour, viscosity and smell of the potion and thanked Vaval for the usage of his workshop. I had no space to take the tools I had bought with me so I left them behind. Vaval asked me if I could return some day to teach him what he just witnessed, the tools would be right here waiting for me. I didn't promise him anything but kept the possibility open.

The concentration had cleared up the fog from my mind of last night's debauchery. Determined I put myself back on the task of finding Addhirannir. I found lots of things in the canton; a wandering Skooma addict I gave some coins, lots and lots of rats and even a secret Daedric shrine to Mehrunes Dagon. I drew Wretched and almost found myself heading to the innards of the shrine to wipe out the evil Daedric Prince worshippers when I realised I had a different mission - one that could no longer wait. Besides, who was I to decide the worshippers were evil and needed to die?

Working my way up in the canton, inquiring with everyone I came across, I ran into an Imperial who seemed very out of place. How much out of place he was became apparent when he informed me of his profession: taxman. No wonder he was looking lost and had a hint of desperation in his eyes. An Imperial and a taxman. In Vicec. I held no personal grudge to him but it was obvious he was being massively ignored and looked at with contempt by the locals.

'Have you seen Addhirannir?' he asked me. So I wasn't the only one looking for her. Something I found rather inconvenient so I made up a story that I had seen her the day before, heading ashore. Probably to Ebonheart..
'I was heading for mainland anyway, I'll look for her there,' Duvianus said.
I wished him good luck but damn well knew that even if the Khajiit had indeed left for mainland he was never going to find her. Ever. I hoped she was still somewhere in Vivec or I'd have a serious problem.

A busy day for Rales! I liked your descriptions of alchemy and its risks.

I especially like this line, as it says quite a bit about Rales:
Besides, who was I to decide the worshippers were evil and needed to die?



I do not have Morrowind, so I am not sure, but was this supposed to be:
Vivec's palace, the High Fane - the pearl of the city.


On the subject of birth control, in the real world Mom's Nature has gifted us many ways to prevent pregnancy. It was only over the last two thousand years that its knowledge and use has been suppressed in the West. There are some examples http://home.comcast.net/~subrosa_florens/witch/six_magic.html. I know I will be using silphium in the TF, as Teresa will be gathering it in the West Weald and selling it to Ardaline at the Bravil Mages Guild. In a magical world like Oblivion it is not at all unreasonable to believe that there are also spells and alchemy to prevent pregnancy as well.

Not to pull things too far OT from Remko's excellent story- I seem to recall some lore regarding the idea that the elves (or maybe just the Dunmer) could "turn their ability to conceive on and off" at need. A common trope of the long-lived races is that they reproduce slowly, no need to create new generations as quickly as short-lived types.

Disclaimer: You will get no advice from me on birth control. :lmao:

:read: Ahh... Another day in the life of Rales. Everything is accounted for - that is, I know where our girl Zerina is while Rales is out Ralesing.

As always, just a pleasure to read! Nicely done again. :goodjob:



*

One could argue that this fits within the 'Rales' perameters, but it did break my pace and cause me to reread it. You might consider: 'Especially if she would really still be there.'




Again, this could easily be attributed to Rales. If so, simply change 'upto' to 'up to'. Traditionally, one would hear this phrase as 'I was soaked to the skin.'

Thanks guys!
I like Trey's explanation but spells and alchemy are plausible as well.

@Treydog:oh my... thank you for that awesome compliment.
@SubRosa:About High Fane, I think I got it right, you wouldn't say "the Vilverin" either, right? I'm glad you liked the alchemy thing.
High Fane is a name so I'd say it doesn't really need "the" in front of it. (unless it just looks/reads wrong of course)
@Acadian:That's okay m8 :lmao:
You're right, "be" should be behind "still" and "upto" was too formal for Rales.
"Ralesing"??... :rofl:
@mALX1:That's a useful quote. Thanks for that! :icecream:

The last update before Christmas. A very merry Christmas to all of you! I hope you all have a good'un! :wave:


It took me several hours before I found a substantial clue. Once I had worked my way up to the Plaza and still hadn't found any trace, I started over outside.
Several tiny, what looked like former storages to me, rooms only accessible from the outside of the canton, were turned into small single-room homes so the poorest of the poorest had a roof over their head as well. In one of those pauper homes I encountered a Khajiit who was actually a friend of Addhirannir.
He wasn't keen on informing me where he had befriended her or what their exact relationship was but after some persuasion - the gold kind - he finally let slip I could find her in the Underworks, beneath the Redoran Wistworks. In a generous mood - and most relieved I might add - I gave him some more coins and wished him a good day.

Scouring every nook and cranny of the shadowy, dimly lit Underworks I finally found my mark behind a pillar. No wonder I had missed her the first time.
'You are Addhirannir,' I assume?'
Apprehensively she looked over my shoulder. 'Don't worry,' I said. 'The Census and Excise officer has left for the mainland.'
'In that case; yes, this one's name is Addhirannir,' she purred. 'What can she do for you?'
'Well,' I started and continued with explaining the reason for me looking for her and why and how I had got rid of the taxman.
She in her turn, told me she knew very little of the Sixth House itself but had heard rumours about smuggling operations for them but that it was all very hush-hush.

In her opinion, that was the really strange thing about the whole situation. She said smugglers usually bragged about large scale operations but about this one no-one had. Almost as though they were afraid. Afraid of what she couldn't say.
As soon as she finished I immediately realised this was the kind of thing Caius would find interesting. Tired and dirty, but succesful, I headed back to the Redoran canton.

Suspiciously Zerina sniffed the fluid after having swirled it around in the vial and uncorking it. 'I'm not sure I can stomach this, Rales,' she commented whille wrinkling her nose.
'Trust me, it'll do you good.'
She looked me into my eyes intensely to check if there was a sparkle of amusemant about her state, shrugged and gulped down the content. 'Tastes just as it reeks,' she said with a disgusted look on her, still quite pale, face. I grinned and said that's how you know it'll work. She feigned an angry look but I could tell the potion had taken effect. Slowly, the colour was returning to her face, her eyes lost the watery look and her usual smile brightened up her face - and my day.

After Zerina already had gone to bed, I was still wide awake, overthinking today's mission and about how experienced Zerina had seemed with the concoction I had given her. The way she had held the vial and had swirled the fluid around made it clear she had done that before. Had she spoken the truth about "the simple potion" she had given me when I was recovering? I wished I had been more clearheaded when I had drank it so I could've recognised the effect and the ingredients. The two questions that haunted me throughout the night were simple: Should I just ask her or wait until she'd tell me herself? The second questions was: Why would she hide the truth from me?

Yay! Another delightfully fun day following Rales around. :goodjob:

Oh oh. . . the suspense and mystery surrounding Zerina it thickening. I am anxious to learn more.

Fortunately, I shall not fret excessively, as I am comforted by the foreshadowing you provided several stories back:



*
'In a generous ood - and most relieved I might add...' {mood?}

*
Merry Christmas RemkoNL!

Edit: OMG, I just noticed. Look at that post count! I think I smell a new thread coming. . . .

OOOHHH, the plot may be thickening! (unlike Zerina's middle)