Note: Okay, so there's nothing even remotely funny about the introduction or prologue. But, I'm using them simply as a means to fill in people who haven't read the previous stories in the series (yeah, they're a series now. Live with it) and also just to provide a real quick intro into the story itself. So, bear with me, the installments after this should be funnier...or at least, that's the plan.

And yes, the intro will fill in the gaps from the last story (such as the ending chapters I never wrote. Huzzah!)

So, enjoy. I hope.

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Introduction: Knowing Where You Come From (Background info is good...)

Nathan and the Relics of Tamriel

The misadventures of Nathan and his friends began roughly fifty years after the Oblivion Crisis, when rumours of a large tower containing the lost relics of Tamriel began to circulate throughout the Empire. Together with his allies, Alderin, Netta and Bruno, the four of them set off from the Imperial City on a series of blunders that would take them across Cyrodiil, Vvardenfell, and even the Shivering Isles, before finally landing them on the winter island of Solstheim.

Little did any of them know, however, what menacing and egotistical evil awaited within the confines of Solstheim. Despite the efforts of Alderin's father, Olothan, his friends Divayth Fyr and Taven, and a young, mysterious Breton named Sakura, the man who lorded over Solstheim, Vanion, easily overpowered the quartet, and imprisoned them within his tower, awaiting the arrival of Nathan and the others.

Upon their arrival on the island, Nathan and his battle weary comrades soon learned that Vanion, once a tyrannical fiend who had terrorized the land of Tamriel, had been secreting away powerful relics on his retreat of Solstheim in an effort to topple the Empire, and construct one of his own. During their battle, Vanion demonstrated strength, magic and agility far beyond even Tamriel's most stalwart fighters. Easily outmatching Nathan and his comrades, their deaths seemed certain until a surprise bottle of mead from Bruno temporarily blinded the man, giving them the time they needed to push him off the peak of the tower, killing him. Narrowly escaping the tower with their lives, and saving those of Olothan and the others, they were promptly informed by one Chancellor Ocato that the relics would be put under lock and key within the Imperial City, and that they would receive nothing for their time or trouble...

Nathan and the Dark Brotherhood

Having defeated a number of foes during their travels, not the least of which was Vanion himself, the exploits of Nathan and the others soon became well known within Tamriel's underground network. Eager to dispose of such a threat, the Dark Brotherhood began sending out lone assassins and terminator squads to deal with them.

Luckily for our adventurers, however, a single man within the Brotherhood's ranks, Slade, turned on the rest of his squad, eager to break free from the Brotherhood's grasp. Hoping both to return home to Cyrodiil, and to stay alive, Nathan and the others accepted Slade's help, and with his knowledge of the assassin's guild, began to eliminate Speakers across Cyrodiil, heading southward towards Vivec.

(Now, I never got this far when actually writing this story, but for the sake of the plotline, let's say I did, mkay?)

When meeting once again with Alderin's father, Olothan, Nathan and his friends realized that Slade could help any number of organizations, like the Morag Tong, take the Dark Brotherhood down. With the aid of the kind old mage, they said their farewells to the former Speaker, and made their way towards Mournhold, where the leadership of the Brotherhood lay in wait.

Venturing deep beneath the ancient 'City of Light,' Nathan and company came face to face with a number of Speakers, as well as the Listener of the Brotherhood. After an intense battle, our quartet emerged victorious, only to realize their work was far from over; in anticipation of their arrival, the consciousness of the Night Mother, the being worshipped by the Dark Brotherhood, had been transferred into a massive body, constructed for her specifically by her followers.

Though the body that had been created proved incredibly formidable, Alderin discovered the husk was in fact unfinished, with a fatal weakness to fire. Using this sole vulnerability, Nathan and his friends barely managed to defeat the form of the Night Mother, though it is believed her spirit escaped the encounter unharmed. With yet another threat defeated, and once again with virtually nothing in the way of a reward, Nathan and the others began through the underground tunnels, in hopes of finding a way home...

And now...

Nathan and the League of Evil

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Prologue: Spooky Men are Spooky (Crime is an industry...)

The meeting room of the League of Evil's Shadow Council was virtually pitch black, the only light that managed to permeate the inky veil filtering through the narrow cracks between the massive double doors situated near the front of the circular chamber. A lone figure, his face concealed by shadow, stood at attention before the large, semicircular desk that encompassed the rear of the room, the silhouettes of the five figures that made up the Shadow Council appearing as black on black within the confines of the room.

"Perhaps we should begin without her?" one of the voices suggested, deep, and slightly irritated. "I see no point in this continuous stalling."

"No," a woman's voice shot back curtly, without compromise. "Her testimony in this case is vital. I refuse to proceed until we have all the facts."

"Are y'all outta yer gods damned minds? What more facts do ya need?" The third voice that sounded off was far more casual than the first two, but was unmistakably condescending nevertheless. "Hell, we got everythin' we need starin' us right in the face, and all y'all wanna do is sit around bickerin' at each other."

Before either of the other members had a chance to voice their concerns, a loud groan sounded without warning from the heavy bronze doors leading into the chamber. Each of the five silhouettes turned in unison towards the noise, to see a new figure stride into the room; a young, lithe Breton woman, bathed in the sudden burst of light that flooded the front of the chamber, and sporting long brown hair, a simple white top and a black mini skirt. She had an elegantly curved katana sheathed at her hip, and just as the mote of light from the adjoining hallway faded behind the closing door, they could make out her determined blue eyes as she took her place next to the other figure that stood before them.

"Ah, Agent Sakura," the first voice began with an air of satisfaction. "We were beginning to wonder whether or not you would arrive."

"My apologies, Councillor," the young woman replied, the bow that she gave just visible in the darkness. "I didn't mean to keep you or the rest of the Council waiting."

"You needn't concern yourself, Sakura," explained the female voice, once again without regard to the other members. "You've proven yourself time and again as one of our finest agents. Moreover, your opinion on this case is crucial." The figure turned slightly, to face the second figure that stood next to Sakura. "As is yours."

"Councillor? I'm afraid I don't understand..." Sakura sounded uncertain, confused.

"Of course, where are our manners?" one of the voices asked. With a single clap, the front of the room where the two agents stood was illuminated in a pale green light, one that seemed to originate from nowhere in particular.

"Agent Sakura? Meet your newest associate."

Sakura turned to look at the young man, now clearly visible. The young Imperial man was unusually pale, and was clad in black clothing from neck to toe, including a heavy black trench coat that partially obscured his thin form. His nearly platinum blonde hair was worn incredibly short, slicked back, and his eyes were obscured by a pair of tinted black glasses. On his sharp, chiselled features, he wore a solemn, professional expression, even as he extended a hand to Sakura. The young Breton took it, though she found her eyes nervously drawn towards the crossbow mounted on the man's leg.

"Agent Sakura, was it? A pleasure to meet you," the Imperial told her, although his tone remained as cool and emotionless as his expression. "I am Agent Slade, former Speaker for the Dark Brotherhood."

Sakura's eyes went wide with surprise, and she fought back the urge to reach for her katana. "Brotherhood?" she asked uncertainly, and then directed her gaze up to the Council. "Councillors...what's this meeting all about?"

"It's recently come to our attention that both you and Agent Slade share some very important friends in common, Agent Sakura," one of the Councillors explained rather nonchalantly. "Specifically, a group that has not only managed to throw the leadership of the Dark Brotherhood into utter disarray, effectively crippling them, but also managed to defeat Vanion, and his most coveted lieutenants, without even a single casualty to their own ranks."

"A group that has, reportedly, not only been associated with both Olothan and Divayth Fyr, but allegedly met face to face with the Daedric Prince of Madness, Sheogorath himself!" roared another of the Councillors.

Sakura, more than aware of whom the Shadow Council was speaking of, found herself frozen in place. "By the gods..." she muttered softly, unsure of what she was going to do.

"This meeting of the Shadow Council is now in session," announced the centre figure, her voice stark and demanding respect. "We will determine what is to be done with the individuals Nathan, Alderin, Netta, and Bruno." The figure looked straight down at Sakura and Slade.

"Agents? Your testimonies."

Good times abound...

Definitely suspenseful, and I am sure all that suspense will be shattered the moment Alderin opens his mouth. I am glad to see this return!