» Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:34 am
Chapter 96: The Tale Of The Tail
I heard Lord Kagrenac humming to himself and asked him to sing me the song. He did, in his rich deep voice and was soon joined by Clavicus Vile, then Divayth.
We do anything we can to survive,
Giving up our minds and hearts and bodies
We will not fight, and we will be torn…
When the song finished I asked to hear another. With a look of unholy mischief Clavicus began singing a song and nudging Shivani.
In Daggerfaaaaall,
they hold a baaaaall
And all of society indulges in a variety
Of scandal, they can handle -- A lot.
The Captain of the Guard
Has to search very haaaard
For a beeeeean that the Queeeeeeen
Has in her pants.
And the Court Sorceress
Will grant you a wish
To cause the King to fliiiiiing
About his lance.
Oh, it's lovely to give your love a single perfect rose
It's lovelier still to do the same not wearing any clothes.
Oh, it's lovely to abandon all your cares and fears and woes
It's lovelier still to do the same not wearing any clothes.
Yes sir, it's lovely not to wear any clothes!"
Lord Kagrenac joined right in singing loudly, and they would draw out certain words and hold them a long time and then shout others quickly. I pulled myself up to watch and try to pick up on the words. Shivani was looking embarrassed but Clavicus kept nudging her so she sang along. As soon as she started singing Divayth turned away, his shoulders shaking. Immediately after that Hannibal walked in calling out,
“I was on the other side of the castle and heard Maxical singing!“
Lord Kagrenac nearly fell down laughing, and Clavicus roared.
They started the song up again, giving us cues for when to hold the word long and when to shout. Janus picked up on it quickly. Lastly Marie joined in, laughing. The song got faster each round till it was going by in a blur of slurred words and mistakes. Then Clavicus and Lord Kagrenac started yowling to match Shivani and I, and soon it became a contest to see which could either sound the most like us or yowl the worst, I could not be sure which.
Shivani told me it was a song she learned back when she had runaway from S’Vandra for a while and lived on a pirate ship.
That night was the last time that Shivani acted like herself. She was fun, smiling, laughing, loving…silly. After that night she seemed totally different.
***
My tail was starting to move again finally. I thought I would surprise Janus with it, so when he was doing the massage on my shoulders and arms I curled it up and over and tickled the back of his neck below the cowl. He jumped a mile and turned around, but I had put it down again. I did it again, and this time I heard Clavicus Vile’s booming laugh while Janus was looking around to see what touched him. My tail was laying back flat.
“It’s not too late to get out of this, my boy. She will lead you a merry dance.”
“What? What are you talking about?” Janus sounded bewildered.
I curled my tail around his neck, laughing.
“That was you? Janus hugged me, squeezing me carefully so as not to hurt my shoulder or lungs. I made a fake choking noise like he was hurting me and pretended to go limp, lolling my head back.
“Little minx!” He said and poked his finger into my armpit.
“Mustn’t…tickle…the cat.” I tried to say it in a stern manly sounding voice, but laughed and ruined it.
“Hey you two, this is a sickroom, not a playground!” Shivani called in a strident voice, her arms were folded.
She wasn’t standing close to Clavicus as was usual for her, and she usually spoke to me in Khajiit. It surprised me to hear her speak Cyrodiilic, although I knew she could.
“Did you hear that? Now we can’t play ‘skin the cat’.” I whispered it loudly.
“I heard that.” Shivani yelled, and started heading towards the bed, her arms akimbo.
I moved into Janus’s arms and leaned against him, trying to look innocent. “What is wrong with Shivani?” I sent the thought to Janus.
He shrugged, then wrapped his arms around me and put his cheek against mine.
“Your tail is working again! You are really going to be back the way you were before! I was so worried!” Janus said it quietly into my hair and lay his face back against mine. “I have missed the funny things you do with your tail and ears.”
I twitched my ear against his face, getting him back for the tickling.
“AARGHH, that feels like a spider crawling on me!”
“I didn’t do anything…Oh no, there IS a spider crawling on you!” I tried for a serious look but failed.
“What does she do, lad?” Clavicus called out as he followed Shivani up to the bed.
“If she is asking you a question, she makes her tail look like a question mark. Sometimes she makes it look like a cane, and sometimes like an ‘S’. If she is telling you a joke she will wrap it around your leg and tug on it and say, ‘I’m pulling your leg’, silly things like that. And then her ears she can do some really funny things too. She puts them up and bends the tips down, or sticks them out to the side and makes a funny face while she is doing it. She will wait till you least expect it and either twitch her ear or tail against your skin, it feels like a spider crawling on your skin.”
“Janus is horribly disgusted by spiders. I‘m not telling any secret, just let one crawl in here and you will see.” I tickled my tail lightly across his arm.
“You can’t get me with that when I can see you do it.” Janus said with a laugh.
Hannibal walked in while Janus was telling Clavicus about these things and he started laughing. “Yes, I remember you got in trouble and almost gave Jarol a stroke with one of them. Which one was it? The snake dancer?”
“I got in trouble for everything I did. But the one that almost put him into a stroke was the one I like to call ’the snake charmer’.”
“Snake charmer? You name your tail movements?” Clavicus asked, his eyes lighting with amusemant.
“Just when I am describing them to someone else.”
“Oh we must hear this story. Do tell!” Clavicus Vile’s eyes lit with interest. He loves jokes and funny stories.
“He almost burst the veins in his face he was so angry.” Hannibal said.
Lord Kagrenac had been about to leave and he turned around and came up to the bed as well. He loves to hear about mischief.
“It was after the incident where someone had crept into his room in the night and painted hair and a beard on him using boot blacking. For some reason (ahem) he suspected Maxical was involved but couldn’t prove it, so he was already angry at her.” Hannibal emphasized the word ’someone’ when he told the story, then indicated I should tell it.
“I was in class. He asked a question and the answer began with the letter ‘S‘. I gave the correct answer, and he kept acting like he thought I was saying the word wrong. He repeatedly accused me of starting the word with the letter ‘F’. He knew I was saying it right and was just pretending not to understand to incite me, so I made my tail into an ‘S’ and turned around to show it to him. He said I was being a smart aleck and had disrespected him by facing my butt to him.”
“Let me see the ’S’.” Clavicus demanded, then roared when he saw it.
“Now, Irlav Jarol kept a list of all my ill deeds on a rolled parchment that was quite large, and he always seemed to have it on his person whenever I got in trouble. He would reach inside his robe and pull it out. Everyone thought he was extremely well endowed till they found out it was just a giant scroll filled with my ill deeds.” I had to stop telling my story to be heard over the laughter.
When it quieted down I started again. ”I think he even slept with it, because ‘The Night of the Watermelons’ he had it in his hands the second he opened the bedroom door.” I had drawled out the title of the prank.
“The Night of the Watermelons?” Clavicus asked, imitating my drawl.
“Someone filled Jarol’s bedroom with hundreds of watermelons and enchanted them so they could not be removed magically, only manually.” Hannibal piped in, emphasizing the word ’someone’ and laughing. “And someone just gave themselves away. How would you know what he did the second he opened the bedroom door? Hmmm?”
I plastered what I hoped was an innocent look on my face.
“Traven told me about it at the time, and he said it the exact same way, drawling out the words.” Janus said, laughing.
“It went around the campus that way, Delphine was the first to name it, and she said it like that. Hannibal always kept up with anything that was going around campus, he knew all the slang words even. So anyway, his skin was still quite stained by the blacking. In fact that stain lasted surprisingly long! It looked like he had dark hair and a dark beard. He marched behind me to the tower with that large parchment in his hand, and he was shaking it and waving it at me. In his white robe and waving that thing around he looked just like a snake charmer with a flute. The whole time he was berating me, and his voice was a high whiney sound. I had to cross the quad in front of everyone with him doing that. So I made my tail act like a snake being charmed out of a basket. He was behind me and had to watch it as we walked. By the time we were standing in front of Hannibal, Jarol was breathing fire. His face was as red as a tomato. He sputtered and fumed, causing spit to fly onto Hannibal.” I looked over at Hannibal, not sure if I should tell what went on then.
“You can imagine how angry that made me.” Hannibal threw in. “I began yelling at him instead of Maxical. Jarol turned as white as a sheet and stiffened up. His legs were like two boards. He fell upon the ground and kicked his stiff legs like any two year old may in a fit. Maxical was watching him with her mouth agape. So I threw a ewer of water on Jarol, and then sent Maxical back to class. Jarol had to be healed after that. I was so mad I sent him to the restoration class and let them practice on him.”
Clavicus and Lord Kagrenac were both laughing hard and demanding to see the ‘snake charmer’.
“I don’t know if I can do it lying down. I usually do it standing up and use my dress as the basket. Put the blanket over me and I will try to do it with that.”
Clavicus Vile did a very good imitation of the sound of a snake charmers flute, and I got my tail to bob and weave out of the blanket like a snake being charmed.
Lord Kagrenac was laughing so hard that I thought to myself, Uh oh. There will be a puddle below him any second.
Both Janus and Clavicus roared, so I guess Clavicus can read thoughts too. Good thing to know since I think around him all the time.
“Do the question mark next, that is my favorite!” Janus said.
“You will have to wait for another time to see it, my patient is tiring and I haven’t examined her yet.” Hannibal shooed everyone away from the bed.
I had turned around smiling and was shocked to see a malevolent look on Shivani’s face. Who was she mad at?
*