» Tue Jun 26, 2012 9:05 am ((The fallout version is here. http://www.gamesas.com/topic/1382340-fallout-3-the-epic-story-spoilers/page__hl__epic%20story ))
Wake up in a prison cell
CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY!
A breton warrior who specializes in destruction and heavy armor
LOL NOOB
Get mocked by blue man
"Your going to die in here imperial!"
"Aren't you in the same boat as m- "SILENCE!"
Wait a miniute
The knights who say ni arrive with pimp-daddy liam neeson
Pimp daddy wants to look into your eyes
EXTREME CLOSE UP
"You were in my dreams, That means the stars were not lying, except for jupiter, jupiter is kinda dou-
"EMPORER WE NEED TO MO-" B!TCH IM THE EMPORER
"Hokay prisoner, Come with us, we can definately trust someone on death row to come with our most powerful man."
Walk into the catacombs from diablo 2
Get attacked by the Mythic Lawn
"DEY KILLED CAPTAIN B!TCH!"
OH FUUUUU- Oh cool a sword.
Use sword and kill things to death
Move on
Get attacked again
Move on
Emporer: Sorry bro, We need to like, Leave you behind.
"Did you not just say i was your last ho- "HEY LOOK RATS!"
OH GOD!
Punch rats to death
Pick up dead man remains
Spam magical spell
Go through door
spam magical spell
Zombie: Do you know what time it is?
KILL IT WITH FIRE!
Move on
See goblin
Extremely helpful window appears
"If you shoot someone in the back of the head, it'll hurt!"
Walk up to it and spam spells
Move on
See magical goblin
Fry em.
Meet back with pimp daddy uriel.
"Sheeeeeeeet, these mythic lawn be all in our grill"
Help kill the mythic lawn
Blademan: KILL THE PRISONER!
"Wait, why?"
BECAUSE YOU MUST BE KILLING THE ENEMY BECAUSE YOU WORK FOR THEM
"But i-"
Uriel: This is not the prisoner you're looking for
Bladesman: Oh, Kay.
Resist urge to punch blade in face
Eventually
"FRIG, A LOCKED GATE."
You: LET ME LOCKPICK I-
WE CAN'T LOCKPICK IT WITHOUT THE CAPTAIN D:
...Why?
Shut up. Go hide in that room with the emporer.
Wait in room with weapon out, pimp daddy talks to you
"I am going to die, Kthnx."
Wait wu-
Mythic Assassin man: What would you do for a klondike bar?
"Well i woul-"
*Stabs emporer*
*Kill the assassin*
Baurus arrives to see you, holding a bloody weapon infront of the emporer's corpse where a hooded man is smashed behind the wall so he can't see the assassin
"I didn't do it."
"Oh hokay. here take this sacred artifact we are all doomed without and take it to old man Jauffre"
"KAY!"
Put amulet on
amulet slips off
Duct tape amulet on
It slips off
Eat amulet
Regret 4 hours later.
One dungeon crawl later
I LIVE, I AM OUTSIDE, I AM THE AMAZI- *Get mauled by bear*
Reload
IM READY FOR YOU THIS TI *out of magicka*
Scream then die
Reload with potions you found earlier
I AM READY FOR YOU YOU MAGGO-..Where is he?
One fast travel load screen later
Get smashed by bear
Fire firebolt
Miss
Hit begger in the face
"Your killing has been observed by forces unknown"
Look at screen for five minutes
Get extremely paranoid
Guard appears out of nowhere
"STOPMURDEREYOUKILLEDTHATPOOR"
I have cash
"Come with me."
Sleep
Wake up
EXTREME CLOSE UP
SH!T SELF
Lucien: *Wheezeeeee* I love the way you sleep* Wheeze* Its so sound *Wheeze* For a murder.
"GET THE [censored] OUT!"
"Kay, go here to join us."
Fast travel
Go into creepy house
Talk to the door of death
"What, Is your name?"
...Bond.
"What, is your quest?"
Iunno.
"What, Is your favorite color?"
Sanguine.
WELCOME MY BROOOOOOOOOOTHER!
the end of part 1. ((Promise the next parts will be funnier. Next is the dark brotherhood storyline, due tomarrow-wedesday
