Patch 2.000000001 notes.

Post » Sun May 22, 2011 9:41 pm

Patch 2.000000001 notes.

Hi, we here at Crytek have heard your complaints about the PC version, and after working hard, decided to ship out the PC exclusive patch 2.0 shortly that fixes all issues!

Top changes:

DX12 support enabled. DX9, 10, and 11 are all disabled. Anyone who doesn't have a DX12 enabled graphic card is obviously a console punk.

Attempting to play this game on any PC with less then 100TB of space, 256 GB DDR 4 ram, 16 core processor, and 8 Graphic cards will have their hard drive formatted completely for being a console noob.

Textures have been upgraded from the more common yet console heavy version of 512 x 512 resolution to the more PC only 524288 x 524288. This has the intended effect of increasing the game download to 1TB.

Graphics are better then real life. However also requires more processing power then real life.

Everything is realistic. No limits, you can wander as far away from the main path as possible, you know, like Farcry 2. Because that was widely regarded as a good game -_-....

We realize that making the suit easier and more streamlined was obviously due to the evil Xbox's influence, and nothing to do with the fact that activating the cloak in the original was a pain in the ass during combat. In an attempt to fix this nano suits are now activated via the following.

Press Q to open the nano suit mode.

Press E twice in quick succession to confirm the nano activation.

Press the home key to open up the nanosuit menu.

Hold the key that corresponds to the suit mode you wish to activate, and the key the corresponds to the body part you wish to activate it on. So if you want to cloak your left arm, press @ + L. (Only one body part can be changed per menu open)

Press enter twice to get back into the fun!


There are now 400 body parts and 24 similar but slightly different suit power settings to choose from.

Also having looked at the mouse, and how easy it makes FPS overall (It's obviously just a anologue stick from a controller in disguise) we've disabled mouse support, and all in game interaction is now dealt with via console commands.

Removed all interactive aliens, CELL members and marines, as they were having the unintended bug of 'gameplay'. Occasionally something will blow up in the distance to show just how priddy our rendering engine is at rendering flames and smoke.

While clearing out our back room, we found two weird buttons, 'Fix all bugs' and 'Stop all hackers'. After pressing them 2.0 has no bugs and no hackers. After further clearing out of the room we also found 'World peace', 'Cure all disease' and 'Kill Justin Bieber', and are debating to press them or not.

In multiplayer fixed the bug of players occasionally not equipping the Scar.

All servers are also lag and connection problem free. Yes we found that button as well.
------------------

I hope you enjoy this patch from the crytek team folks. For some none patch related news, we've decided to send a Xbox and PS3 patch out that breaks their respective games, making this a PC exclusive! We also punched EA in the face, and moved our office to 32 Gumdrop avenue (Ask the troll-king of the area for directions). We've also stopped paying our staff, and after making Crysis 2 into the best PC gaming can get, are now just sitting in the room and waiting for the power to go out.
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Nathan Maughan
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 6:50 pm

I liked the sarcasm! :D
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Sarah Kim
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 2:47 pm

Lol, this is actually what everyone on the forums want, i wouldnt be surprised if crytek launches a patch that is so resource demanding that everyone complains about it not running on their pcs
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Nina Mccormick
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 3:16 pm

I liked the sarcasm! :D

Who's being sarcastic?

Does this mean the game now requires a 9000-floppy disc installation process? To appease the hard-core PC gamers and what not.
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Connor Wing
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 5:40 pm

lol you must be on crack :)
good one tough
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Spaceman
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 11:03 am

I liked the sarcasm! :D

Who's being sarcastic?

Does this mean the game now requires a 9000-floppy disc installation process?

Floppy discs?

When I first started on the Spectrum ZX, we used cassettes. :P
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adam holden
 
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Post » Mon May 23, 2011 2:09 am

"Back in my day, gaming was the peripheral"
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Trey Johnson
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 6:41 pm

I liked the sarcasm! :D

Who's being sarcastic?

Does this mean the game now requires a 9000-floppy disc installation process?

Floppy discs?

When I first started on the Spectrum ZX, we used cassettes. :P

I still remember the god awful noises they made xD

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Margarita Diaz
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 7:23 pm

"Back in my day, gaming was the peripheral"

:P

By the way, didn't I meet you in a server yesterday Bainshie?
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Pat RiMsey
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 5:19 pm

lol!
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Laura Cartwright
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 9:53 am

what about computers which were biglike a factory;) can we write it in letters?:D
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Sakura Haruno
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 7:29 pm

Banshie, this should be a sticky. It's absolutely classic. Good job!
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Rowena
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 10:10 am

We also punched EA in the face, and moved our office to 32 Gumdrop avenue
lolol
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Chris Duncan
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 9:00 pm

bump
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Lil'.KiiDD
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 4:02 pm

I'm surprised at the lack of rage this post generated. Maybe I went too far out of the realms of reality.

Or maybe I didn't go far enough.....
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Emma Copeland
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 5:41 pm

Haha this was hilarious xD
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Dale Johnson
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 11:20 pm

STICKY PLEASE!
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Stay-C
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 10:04 pm

Epic post. The haters would probably still cry console port though......
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Tarka
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 11:14 am

I loled xD
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Fanny Rouyé
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 1:17 pm

Bumping for fun and giggles.
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abi
 
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Post » Mon May 23, 2011 1:35 am

lollllllllllllllll
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Tasha Clifford
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 8:31 pm

Ooooh, loooking forward to this patch Crytek, thanks!

BTW, do you have a config file that would set the Quality setting to -800 for this patch so I can play it on the PC I get in 3 generations time?

Thanks again!
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Ella Loapaga
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 12:11 pm

Well done.

(Wouldn't the kill beiber button have been pressed repeatedly upon finding it?)

Broca, having a setting like that would be against the wishes of "the major population".
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Philip Rua
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 10:57 pm

lols this thread delivers.
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Trista Jim
 
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Post » Sun May 22, 2011 4:53 pm

+ rep.

Hahahahaaa.
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JESSE
 
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