I would like, once again, to add my voice to the chorus of praise that seems to follow you after every posting, BSparrow. I thought you were a great writer before, but I can see how you've taken some of the more recent critique to heart, and it glows like a candle. I am but a helpless moth, unable to resist the warm light

:foodndrink: Here's to you, BSparrow! May you look kindly on my attamp at a poetic complement!

The sights, sounds, feelings, even suggestions of smells, so unobtrusively and masterfully woven as to make me forget that I was reading at all. I was there!

My first reading of this was like effortlessly watching a wonderful movie flow before my eyes.
My second reading was spent taking some notes on how in the world you do it - beautifully and simultaneously painting the scene, while developing the characters and plot.

Your writing is just plain inspirational; Especially to a newer writer like myself. Thank you. :read:

A very small point, BSparrow.

"Sic it at me, then, like a huntsman hiding behind his dogs. A true believer in the Mythic Dawn has no need to fear death."

Now Ruma here knows that she's no match for this Daedra Lord, and she's about to die - I don't think she would say that sentence in that mild tone of voice! How about Ruma snarling, or spitting out that defiant speech? I suspect she actually did, in your mind, but you forgot to describe it!

Thanks for that description of that Dremora lord with the Claymore - though your claymore chop is slightly off: you have described a horizontal slash, whereas it would be more natural for the much taller Dremora Lord to do a 45 degree chop that would slice Ruma from the neck to under the armpit on the opposite side, an easy chop since she isn't wearing armour and the D-lord is phenomally strong. Ah, but I'm nitpicking.

That's really interesting, because when I read it through, I actually got something slightly different. In my head, I heard her say it calmly, with a mixture of pride and scorn. I'm not saying that you're wrong, I just found it interesting that I got a very different interpretation

Heh... obviously, it's a deficit in my writing either way, if you both got different interpretations from it.

I shall have to make tone-of-voice clearer next time. :foodndrink:

Oh, and :wub: @ all of you.

I must say that I am extremely happy this baby is alive and kicking. (as I am with every baby that is alive and kicking )

I am still reading the old story, have not reached this thread yet - it is riveting!!! The characters are so real that you feel like you know them personally! And some of the twists you wove into the plot are so subtle! Awesome writing!!!!

I am so delighted you are picking up the story, you have soared far beyond you were gone to crown yourself as a magnificent writer.

please, keep this work up, and also, when you get published, please tell us how to acquire your masterpieces

well done!

Here Here!!!!! Ditto!!! More Please!

Wow.
I just spent the past two days using every spare second reading this story, and I'm amazed. More!

BSPARROW

ARE YOU GOING TO COME BACK, OR SHALL I USE ONE OF MY SUMMONING POEMS ON YOU???

:stare:

Ode to the Black Sparrow


Your readers sit in pain and angst
Waiting for another chance
To welcome words flowing from your pen
and experience them with you once again.


ARGH!!!!


PS: It's no Foxy, but the best I could muster in a few minutes, ROFL !!! - We miss your prose!


Yours truly,


mALX
Necromancer at large


*

Just a little bump so this doesn't get eaten by the forums. I enjoyed reading through this story so much, very well written and believable.