Sorrow. That was what lead me through life. Infinite sorrow. If I could of changed my life, I would of changed the lives of many. But, what ever damned fool it is that watches over us, had a different plan.

My name is Danny Reeves, and this is my sad tale.

I know it was just and Introduction to the story, but my opinion for you would be to add more. Dont just post the Intro, accually along with the intro post the First Chapter. But thats my personal opinion.

This is the shortest story you have posted yet.

You give 0 detail, 0 back ground, you say the characters name ,and nothing happens

Patience! I just started up. i shoulda added some detail to that intro, but that will be Chapter Ones duty. And beleive me, the chapters are long, because the post are long. Not my average fanfiction about a dude running in some place and kicking anything that is bad in the rum. I am going to the greatest of my efforts for this one.

Black hand, my advice to you: Stop. Just stop. Stop writing. Stop TRYING to write.

Where's the sad tale? I don't see it.

Don't worry, it's just another one of his million fan fiction failures.

First chapter will be in by the end of this month. I have been experiencing ALOT of techniqaul difficulties with my PC. Going to be getting a new one.

First off, though I may svck now, that doesnt mean I cant get better. I just need to learn, and I am planning on learning. The only thing I seem to experience getting in the way of my stories, is lazyness to work on them. That lazyness to just, get up, and make some ideas into words, is why I make things in such short pieces.

It is also a matter of motivation. Motivation, as we all may know, is hard to come around these days. But, every once and awhile, we get just a small amount of motivation, to do great things. So without further ado of me bumping, I will stop posting crap and start posting stuff worth reading. Just give me some time, some motivation, and boom. We may just have me doing somthing worth it.

Why exactly did you feel that it was neccesary to write two sentences, and then tell us that nothing was going to happen for a while. Why not just wait and post it when it is done?

Please, post large sections of text at a time. It gets people more interested. You have not built any suspense thus far, and building suspense is the key in any introduction. Avoid cliches, though. Do not ask the reader any questions, stuff like that. If you had not posted any of the story, but posted a stellar idea or introduction, people would have gotten a lot more interested. However, I would have preferred, if i were you, at least, to avoid intros and just freaking write.

Also, DO NOT make promises, unless you intend to keep them. In the area of writing, promise of action, suspense, intrigue, and other five-dollar words are worth nothing compared to delivering them. For Beast Of Burden, i made one promise, to finish it. I will, indeed, but i gave no time frame or year, no stitch in measure to go by. This is true with all product. It is, why you hear "When it's done" more often then not, unless it's done already.

Just my 2 caps.

I think its freakin retarded that you post two (boring) sentences and tell us the first chapter isn't going to be up for a month. Whats the point in that hm?

I also hate the cliched "I'm (insert name here), and this is my story." Get some originality and come back later.

What... the hell... was I thinking... DOUGH! :facepalm: Truly, I dont think a Fallout story is in my reaches. Atleast not right now. I am much better when it comes to writing Elder Scrolls stories, because im not getting that, "Ok, have this car blow up, setting off a chain reaction. AHH DUDE! They should fight a Behemoth!" stream running through my head My apologies for wasting digital paper. Im killing the virtual trees!!!!





-presses the lock button-

I agree.