i remember there being one at some point. what was it? any way around it? thanks!

Yes, Trebonius Artorius asks you to kill some Telvanni councilors. Simple way round it is just not to do it as it is his second and last quest.

Hey are you able to taunt them into attacking you that way you get the quest done AND you aren't kicked out of Televani?

Pretty much. I'd recommend leaving Aryon alone and Demnevanni because they're useful for other things, but you can toast the other ones, even without taunting. The Telvanni don't seem to be picky about what you do to other faction members (if you do it and survive, you must have been right), so getting reinstated is just a matter of asking (unless you are the only surviving councilor - it's hard to ask yourself about making amends). On the other hand, you *can* name yourself Telvanni Hortator if you're the last one standing. Go figure.