Ok i don't take orders, specially not from Mr. House the computer man, i don't like him, how do i get the boomer to not help him without killing them, i personally would prefer the NCR live, however i want to be the one to rip the legionnaire apart myself, they are a pest and sick, any advice on how i can do this

The Boomers help *you*....not House, or the NCR or the Legion. If you don't want to recruit them to fight at the Dam go with Yes Man and tell him you want to ignore them. The NCR, Legion and House want you to either recruit them into using thier battery of howitzers on the Enemy or make sure they are not a factor (by killing them). If they knew about the B-29 they'd probably freak.

ok so do i need to talk to anyone at the ncr or do i just do what the boomers ask of me and then talk to them about it.

You should've gotten an invitation from the NCR ambassador right after you dealt with Benny at the Tops, I suggest you go see him and see if he doesn't have any tasks for you.

you dont need to deal with Benny, just go see House, you get the invite after you leave

Once you do a series of quests for the Boomers (most of which are quite fun) then they will pledge to help you when the time comes. You can tell all the other people whatever you want about whether the Boomers will help them or not up until the last part of the MQ. Then you tell the Boomers what you want blown up, and they do that for you.

Or, as stated above, you can ignore them. However their help in the final battle is a good thing.

Now, if you want to do things your way, then work with Yes Man and you can do what you want at the end, even while telling House, Caesar, and the NCR that you will do things for them as you go along.