Can somebody please tell me exactly why I can't give my character a huge smoking cigar to chomp on while I mow down hundreds of Fiends screaming "get some?"

I propose an idea to Bestheda. Make a big puffy cigar a piece of apparel for your character that goes in the same slot as, say, a Rebreather (can't be used with full face helmets, but can be used with hats). And give it some traits like +1 CHR or something.

Show of hands, who wants a big fat cigar as apparel?

This belongs in the http://www.gamesas.com/index.php?/topic/1154199-future-dlc-suggestions-6/.