OK, first thing, pick a single overhaul mod, not multiple overhaul mods.
If you want the game to be harder, then J Sawyer's or Arwen's mod is the one to go with.
I see many other threads wherein people combine overhaul mods
I'm using A World of Pain right now and see added things like story notes and places added discreetly but effectively, although it does add more fps elements by adding enemies. There is roleplay depending on how you approach the combat situations, and the side stories are there for enjoyment of them. It does have low loot patches for the scrounging feel. Unfortunately, not all npcs are voiced so I had to turn on dialogue text. Also use vanilla hardcoe mode and throw away the canteen if you have the pack that adds it to your inventory at the start of the game. Look into the "Uncut" series of mods on nexus that add back content that was cut because they couldn't work at that time. Exept for Uncut #8 which added to the intro. That one crashed upon starting new game every time for me.
I haven't tried it, but maybe wasteland settler for NV, which will have you create an outpost and defend it from harm as it grows into a settlement.