This is not a thread about suicide so please don't bring it up.

I think about dying alot, there's even alot of days where I just want to die already and get out of this miserable world, and away from the people who seem to hate me...and, lately, that seems like most people.

Yes, mostly because I don't want to die.

The thought of dying terrifies me, as I am not a religious man. I've come to the conclusion that everything I am and ever will be is biological.

Once that's gone, I'm gone. I'll never see, feel, hear, taste, or smell anything again. I'll never have another though. I'll never know love, nor hate. In time, it'll be as if I never existed.

I won't be anything. There will only be nothing.

These thoughts shoved me into the worst anxiety I ever had in my life last summer, my dog dying not making things easier. The way I got through it was by reveling in the fact that, at this moment, during this very second, I am alive and aware. Every morning that I wake up, I am grateful for that fact, and every night that I sleep, I hope that it stays that way.

I don't want to die. And as long as I'm not dead, I will live. I owe it to myself, and the thousands of years worth of people that came before me. I will live for myself, and I will live for the great people whom no longer can.