So, background...

The house next door is occupied by an elderly woman. Her son lives about an hour away. He calls me once in a while when he needs someone to check on his mom...help her up if she falls, one time fix her TV remote (dead battery)... that kind of little stuff.

Another piece of background, I usually mow my lawn on Mondays.

Another piece of background. Sometime long ago (before me) someone decided they wanted the TV in a different place in the living room and did a really shoddy job routing a cable jumper outside, around the chimney, through the fence, through the front bushes, and back in on the other side of the fireplace.

Now, the events and the question...

On Saturday her son and grandson were up visiting/working on the place. They mowed her lawn, and I noticed today they mowed mine too. I also noticed they mowed it much shorter than I do (and here in the desert that can be hard on the grass), which contributed to the two mowed sprinklers I had to fix today. They also pushed the mower deep under the bushes to get the little scrappy weed/grass that grows under there, which contributed to me having to redo the cable jumper (which I knew needed to be done better anyway, but hadn't considered it a really high priority) because the movement of the bushes pulled one of the connectors loose.

So, I do appreciate the thought, and would like to say thanks or whatever...but I also really don't want them to do it again.

Any ideas how to not sound ungrateful here?

Tell them to get the [censored] off your lawn.

Just thank them and tell them that you appreciate it, but ask them not to do it again because you're meticulous about how it has to be done.

Tell them with a warm smile, but firm and sincere, about the problems you get when they help. Remember, a warm smile and let them know you do appreciate their gesture. If they are ordinarily reasonable people, they will understand your position.

That sounds so easy...I just have a hard time picturing my response if someone said that to me being anything but 'sorry I wasted my time, jerk'....maybe that's just me though. I'd also have a hard time keeping a straight face if I was claiming to be 'meticulous' about it...my front yard is maintained, but it ain't going to make the cover of Better Homes and Gardens any time soon.

Then...don't tell them to stop doing your lawn? No matter how you ask them to stop, it's going to seem the same to you. You either have to force yourself to do it, or don't and live with a poorly-maintained lawn.

Yes, that's just you. Don't project your disposition onto others. They are probably completely unaware of the troubles they are causing you. If you let them know, they will not only understand but even be a bit embarrassed of the trouble they have caused you. Again, if they are reasonable people, they will understand your position.

"Thank you so much, but you really don't have to bother anymore." coupled with a big, sixy smile. They just wanted to help out.

".. a big, sixy smile"

A lot of people underestimate the power of a good timed smile.

I'm more of a thug than a smiler.

I'm currently enjoying ESPN 2, which used to have an intermittent signal breaking up issue that drove me crazy. Apparently I should have fixed that botch jobbed jumper a long time ago. And in the grand scheme of things, I've mowed at least fifty sprinklers in my time.

I think I will just thank them next time I see them...and take to mowing my lawn on Fridays so they won't be inclined to do it for me on the weekend.

They meant well, and overall the results were good.

Thugs can smile.

I can smile...it's that 'warm' or 'sixy' part that was recommended that tends to elude me. People who don't know me usually think that when I smile I am thinking about eating them.

You can look warm as long as they can see you're being honest. You're helping their elderly lady, they surely think very well of you as it is.

Just be like: http://www.superfreegift.com/fun/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/1.32.jpg

"Thanks for mowing the lawn, mate. I appreciate it, but you didn't ave to go through all that trouble." It's a typical reply that they should recognize and opens up other avenues. Then roll with where the conversation goes. Do you have any projecs coming up where you could use a hand? Do you like to fish and could use some new lures? A favorite beer?

In other words, drop hints as to how else you could use their good will. Truely, it's great that they wanted to return the favors. Just try to redirect them or let them get to know you better. That way they'll have more options.

Bottom line is that it's great that you're both considerate enough to help each other out. :lifter:

Then eat them. Problem solved, and you save on groceries.