» Thu Aug 14, 2014 9:20 pm The topic title is is just me taking a major poke at myself, and some of you may get it, others not so much. I should warn you, this may be a big wall o' text. :/
To start, late last year/earlier this year I was... semi-involved with someone. She had wanted to keep it a secret from her work family (who didn't want the two of us together, but their meddling kinda pushed us closer together), so I had no problem with that and was willing to do what I had to to keep her out of trouble. I'll admit most (90%ish) of our relationship was texting and making plans to spend time together. Yes, we were able to spend time together other than while she was working like we used to. She also got me onto Facebook, even though our contact there was very little.
Around Valentine's Day we made plans to spend some time together (get something to eat and hang out), but she never showed up (plan was for her to come by the apartment and pick me up) and I never heard from her for over a month. I finally slipped by her work to find her working by herself and talked to her. First off- she didn't realise a month had passed since we last talked. Second- supposedly Mama P made a new rule of no cell phone use while working (believable as we were texing all day), but I didn't understand why she couldn't have texted me before work, after work (she had texted me during her night classes), or on Sunday when she didn't work at all... her phone problems not withstanding. A few days later I texted her early in the day, and she responded back, that was the last time for that.
Over the next several months, I still tried texting her, and a few times messaging her on FB (she read all of them), but I never heard back from her. She started sharing photos and posts that were negative against someone, and I believed that they were directed towards me, even though she's the one that quit talking to me. I had a crazy idea so I sent her a dozen roses at work, but left my name off the card. I figured that she would be working with Mama P, and knew between the roses and the message that she'd know that I had sent them. I also messaged her on FB trying to explain why I sent to roses.
Later that week I caught her working by herself again (I hadn't tried to catch her like that for three months) and we talked.... kinda. She was really in a bad place, emotionally; she told me that she had been mugged while checking on a friend's pet while he was out of town. Her attitude towards me was hard to read; I could still see she had feelings for me, but she wasn't showing them like she used to, if that makes sense. I told her that I still think the world of her, and her mood seemed to get darker. It was more like we caught up (we talked about work, her classes, and siblings) than actually talked about anything. There was also a few other things going on that I found out by accident later (her and her cousin where in court over a crappy used car that they bought together and the cousin took, but never paid off).
Later that night she deactivated her FB account, then two days later reactivated it. A friend of hers from work (who at that time was my only other 'friend' on FB) left a message on my FB page saying that she thought it was sweet that I sent roses. Several days later, her FB account seemed to disappear entirely. A few weeks later the friend made a few posts on FB which made it sound like all of the drama and bs at work was getting to her, which ended with her changing her place of employment.
During the next two months I realised that she had quit talking to me entirely and I just didn't notice. I went through all the phases, feeling angry and hurt, betrayed, stupid, although I never hated her even though part of me knew that I should. I had never been as close to anyone as I was her, hell, I'd go as far to say that I loved her and part of me wanted to tell her when I saw her last, but it wasn't the time or place.
However, every once in a while I'd take a peek at her mom's FB page to see if there was any updates about her. Last night I took a look and saw a vague comment from Monday that had me concerned, but no details. Earlier today I took another look, then looked at her siblings pages and only her younger sister had anything posted publicly. On Monday someone had asked her (the sister) if anyone had heard anything from this girl and there was a reply that 'she had been found and was ok' which really had me worried. Without knowing anything about this, I tried texting yesterday for the first time in two months. I thought about messaging her mother to see if she could tell me anything, but I'm not sure it would come across right since I only found this out by poking around, and I don't know what she really told her mom about me.... I mentioned this all to my sister and she said I should just wait and see if she texts me back, other wise just forget her.
Now, it may seem strange being concerned even though she quit talking to me entirely, but I still care about her, and there was a promise that I made her as a friend to be there whenever she needed me for whatever she needed of me, and I would still honour that promise in a heartbeat. Also, I'd REALLY like to know what happened between us; the not knowing is still driving me mad.
I suppose this is where I put tl;dr- had friend, friend became someone special, loose contact with friend/someone special partially then completely, find friend/someone special has had seriously major problem/incident and don't know how to contact or even if I should. No, I'm not really asking for advise here, I'm just thinking out loud, in a sense. I'm just confused.
