Note to Reader: In this story, I mixed it up with different syntax, and also put in some hidden symbols. Although you may not be able to identify them right away, after repetition of them, you will find what they are and what they stand for. The following 'chapter' is the prologue, not in the view point of the main character.

This takes place some time after the Crisis, and the guild you hear of is the Fighter's Guild and it's run-in with increased bandits/marauders.

Dusk
Prologue

Cassius felt his feet pounding into the ground. The wind whipped into his face, and stung his eyes. The faint glow of the moon rode through the dark night and reflected off the cobblestone flooring. Adrenaline flew threw his veins, pushing him into a strenuous run. Tears flew from his eyes as he continued to sprint the length of the catwalk, running for his life. The metal clinks of his armor came at every step, and he could feel his sword rhythmically hitting his thigh.

He rounded the corner, and collapsed. He fought for breath, which just wouldn’t come. Tears streamed from his eyes, and Cassius ripped off his helmet. His short, brown hair was matted to his scalp, and his whole face was drenched in sweat. His lungs burned like a raging fire, and his heart smashed into his chest with every beat. The pictures…they wouldn’t stop coming. He couldn’t help but remember it…

They were to be escorting a scholar in some Ayelid Ruin to check out a statue that lay deep within. What they didn’t bet on was being ambushed by Marauders. While walking through a narrow corridor, Cassius remembered one of his feet sinking into the ground. He had stepped on a pressure plate, and sprung the trap. Arrows flew from the walls, impaling two of his best friends. He remembered their faces…the lifeless eyes staring back at him. Cassius, his other guild member, and the client ran in the other direction, arrows flying all around. They were cut off by a group of Marauders, and the client was quickly stabbed. The two quickly unsheathed their swords, but it was too late for his guild mate. He was stabbed through the chest, going right through the worn iron armor. He remembered the limp body falling on the floor…blood gushing from the wound.

Cassius ran the other way, busting out of a wood door. He ended up outside and ran for his life. That’s how he got into the situation he was in now…

It had all happened so fast. In less then a minute, everyone he loved was killed. And now, they were coming from him. Cassius looked for another way to run, but it was a dead end. The gloomy walls ran up at least seven feet, and so he had no chance to jump to safety. His heart fell into his stomach as he heard footsteps increase in volume. They rounded the corner, and stood face to face with Cassius.

Cassius was a good fighter, but two on one was still no match. He was in a limited space, and could not manuever. He tried to brandish his longsword as the others closed in. Cassius’ heart began to skip beats as the first of the swords clashed. He brought his sword up to block a blow from above, then tried to simultaneously defend a blow from the bottom, but it was impossible.

He felt a fiery-cold feeling thrust into his stomach. He felt nothing but a warm sensation flow over him. He fell to his knees, half-conscious. He felt something slippery in his hands, and looked down to see his holding of his own intestines. He threw up, and blackness turned over him.

The last thing he heard was the call of the raven, and his life ended.

That was a very well written piece of work--only one sentence felt awkward:

I feel like you should have a 'supposed' in there--but it's just a minor item, I guess.

I look forward to reading more of this.

To change up the sentence structure, I replaced 'supposed' with an infinitive. It still makes since, but thanks for the heads-up.

This is cool man. i enjoyed reading it

I'm gonna come back to read more of this. :nod:

Dusk
Chapter 1: The Master’s Son
Guild meetings were few and far between, and usually it was bad business. For ten years now, Karina Donton, the Granddaughter of Vilina Donton, had led the guild. She was aged now, though, well in her fifties. Her gray ponytail was a signature style of hers, as well as the common shirt and pants. She sat at the table, obviously annoyed, and sipped her tea with vigor. The others sitting around the table were the leaders at the local halls in Tamriel. Karina’s son, Cimber Donton, also sat at the table, across from his mother.

“Ah-Malz, the report from your latest…incident?” Karina said, putting an emphasis on ‘incident’. She shot a displeased look at the Argonian, who was unprepared for the sudden request.

“Oh…yes.” he replied, fumbling with some papers. He pulled one out, and began to read allowed,

“Swordsman Ennah, Journeyman Cassuis Callonus, and Associates Alavvur and Sadris Raram were sent into Ayelid Ruin named Silorn to escort Ayelid Scholar Ania to find some ‘statue’. Party has not been seen since, and was assumed to be attacked by the ‘Ayelid Marauders’.

“And you haven’t sent a search party out?” blurted Cimber, obviously enraged.

“No, we have lost too many men to Marauder ambushes, I couldn’t risk any more.” The Argonian retaliated.

“He’s right, it would be foolish to send any more people in.” said Tadros Halas of Bravil. She sat at the table, looking tired. She had not been so lucky with this infamous group of marauders either.

“What I want to know is this: Where are all these Marauders coming from?” quizzed Azzan of Anvil. The table sat in silence as nobody could produce a logical reason.

“The real question is,” The guild master Karina Donton began, “is whether we should or we should not send out any more of our men. We are low in recruitment as it is, in we don’t need any more dead men on our hands. On the other hand, if we stop our contracts, then we will be out of a job, and these Marauder sightings will increase.”

“We don’t need to put my faithful men in harms way!” yelled Vantus Prelius of Leyawiin, obviously against hunting down the marauders.

“These ‘faithful men’ decided to put their lives on the line when they joined this guild. They will put their lives on the line to get what they need done.” Cimber barked back. The Breton looked back in anger, but kept his mouth shut. He knew better then to argue with the Master’s Son.

That pretty much settled the argument. Karina shot a angry stare at her son: he was obviously a threat to her power. Such were the ways of the powered back then, corrupted with it. The guild master pulled out a necklace, a golden one, with an insignia of a lion on it.

“Cimber, go to Silorn and find out what is going on there. Kill the marauders, and try to find and verify the bodies.” Karina ordered her son, and she got up and left, still holding the trinket.

Cimber sighed and nodded his head. It was a short yet productive meeting. Cimber had a feeling that many more like this were to be called in the near future, and they would not turn for the better. He was used to being ordered about, though, and getting himself in and out of dangerous situations. Preceeding even his mother, Cimber had become an excellent swordsman. However, Cimber was ‘stuck’ at the level of Protector, even though many suggestions have been made that he become the new Champion.

His mother would hold her gold necklace, and then begin to berate them. Thus, the suggestions seemed to stop, and Cimber stayed at his level. He didn’t really mind though, as long as he was doing the work.

He would leave tomorrow for the city of Skingrad, stay a night, then get to the ruin. Cimber sat at the empty table, sipping his tea, which had grown cold long ago. As dusk approached, and the light was robbed of the room, and Cimber headed up tp his room, leaving the empty table to bask in the moonlight.

This is easy and fun to read. I'm partial to Oblivion, so I'm really enjoying where you seem to be going with the story. Looking forward to more. :foodndrink:

Thanks for the reviews. I really am going to try and put out better chapters that are more descriptive. It'll start with the 3rd Chapter (I have the second written, but I don't like to publish chapters as soon as they are written because if I hit a brick wall then I can go back and change the previous chapters) and make it more descriptive.

Thank you.

Dusk
Chapter 2: Prepare to Drop
Cimber Donton had made the trip to Skingrad without harm. It was odd, he thought, that even with the increased crime rate, he didn’t even stumble upon a wolf. Well, he wasn’t one to cry over a bandit not wanting his life. The guild hall in Skingrad welcomed Cimber like a hero, and couldn’t wait for him to get out and retaliate against the marauders.

The guild offered their best warriors to accompany him, but Cimber declined. He didn’t want any more guild deaths, especially on his hands. That would just give his mother a reason to demote him, which she would do if she had a reason. But, the guild council is sound, and so she can’t get just everything she wants.

The next day, as well, was uneventful. Bread, mead, practicing, and helping out some of the associates the guild hall picked up yesterday, which were the fallens’ sons and daughters, wanting to take up the family business. Cimber admired their courage, even in the face of defeat, people are still willing to join the fallen.

It was night now, on the second day in Skingrad. Cimber had long since decided to infiltrate at dusk, as to catch them in their half-slumber. Or better yet, when they are sleeping. However, that was a decision luck had yet to decide.

Cimber woke up from a rest he decided to take before he set out. He sat up in his bedroll, and took off his night clothes. He put on his Iron Chainmail, and his Steel Plate over it. He donned his leather cap, then his steel helmet over that. The fire from the torches danced in the dark, and the light reflected off the spotless armor.

Cimber was known for his three swords.

One: His Akaviri Dai-katana, given to him as a gift from the blades after the service he did them when he had taken out a necromancer that was doing the Blades harm.

Two: His Elven shortsword, enchanted with a mild chill spell. He had dueled a Dunmer a long time ago, and they had put their blades on the line. Cimber had to admit that he was lucky, the Dunmer was a far better fighter then him, but the Dunmer lost his footing and Cimber took the advantage and won.

Three: His Daedric Longsword. His father, whom Cimber hated, was a good friend of the Champion of Cyrodiil. Cimber doesn’t know how he was, but he was. When the CoC passed from an infected wound, his father was given the sword, as the CoC had mentioned in his will. Cimber hated his father, for reasons he would not wish to explain, and put a contract in to the Dark Brotherhood, and a bonus if they got him the sword. It had cost him one and a half thousand gold, but it was worth it.

Each of those swords had a special use, so Cimber had discovered after countless dungeon raids. The Akaviri Dai-katana was extremely useful for when Cimber was outnumbered. He had taken on three Bandits, whom were somewhat skilled, with the one sword, and was able to disarm and kill them. Cimber always bragged about that story.

The shortsword was good for close encounters. If the enemy had a longsword, he would use the shortsword to get in close where the longsword can’t maneuver as well. And the Daedric Longsword? Well, you can guess what that is good at. (I’ll give you a hint: Everything).

And so, with his equipment on, the guild bade him farewell as he exited the hall. He trekked through the hills, and through the trees. The moon had taken it’s shift, and it streamed down through the leaves. The leaves of the trees danced in the wind, and small droplets of water decided to take the plunge from the sky above.

Cimber knew he was in range of the Ayelid Ruin when he saw the green light of the moon bounce off the odd, white stone. Whispers of the woods wrapped themselves around the Master’s son, begging him not to travel into the depths of the Ruin.

Cimber climbed into the ruin, and got to the door. So far, so good. He had not encountered any resistance, so far. Now, to start that investigation…
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Yes, the chapter name is an allusion to ODST.

Good read. I enjoyed it. Keep writing.

Interesting, the difference between your chapters one and two. The first one was a detailed description of one scene that shed oodles of light on your story. The second chapter was very different. More of an unvarnished 'did this today', 'did that tomorrow', 'look at my swords'. Both were good, but frankly, I enjoyed the approach you took in the first chapter. I'm not sure your char accomplished anything that could not easily be shown in a few scenes of him actually arriving his destination. For example, his swords could be nicely described as used, instead of bluntly listed so early. I'm hardly an accomplished writer though, so take that with a grain of salt. Looking forward to the next chapter! :goodjob:

Dusk
Chapter 3: Silorn
The clouds kidnapped the moon as the night engulfed the ruin in darkness. No longer did the small green lights of the Ayelid stone dance off each other, but were still and did not come at all. The cold wrapped itself around Cimber, the freezing air seeping into the steel armor. Cimber continued to look around the outside of the ruin, keeping an eye open for anything suspicious. Nothing but the dancing blades of grass that grew up through the cracks of the stone dared to move, and the whispers of the forest became still and quiet. After Cimber decided that there was no sign of death or fighting on the outside, he slowly pushed in the Ayelid door.

The sound of stone grinding against stone greeted the warrior, and the door swung open, hitting against the wall inside. Cimber slowly made his way inside the Ayelid Ruin, walking down the steps that numbered the entrance. The warm air of the ruin happily made it's way to the young warrior, and mixed with his already cold armor. Cimber decided to leave the door open incase he needed to make a hasty retreat.

The glowing stones that were held in cages suspended above the floor created a light source in which Cimber could see. Every little scuttle and sound made Cimber's head whip around in a fury, looking for the source. Cimber wasn't usually this cautious, but the recent ambushes put everyone's nerves on end.

Cimber silently drew his Elven shortsword as he continued through the narrow corridor. As the glow of the stones began to dull, Cimber pulled out a torch, which he lit, and the orange light pushed the darkness back into the corners of the room. Cimber continued through the warm, dank corridor which led into an empty atrium. Cimber was hesitant to enter, but slowly made his way in.

The first thing he looked for was any higher ground in which the enemy could of set up. He saw a raised bridge that hugged the far wall, and different pillars and decorations blocked the bridge from the rest of the atrium. However, there was still enough room to shoot an arrow through, and so Cimber kept one eye open as he continued into the middle of the atrium.

More glowing stones set on podiums populated the center and the outer walls of the corridor, creating a medium of darkness between the center and the walls. Cimber saw, out of the corner of his eye, a glowing stone fall from it's podium, creating a loss of light in that area, and a small metal noise, as if the stone were empty. He positioned his body that way, his heart racing and lungs breathing heavily. He felt a sigh of relief wash over him as a mouse scurried by, frightened by what he had just done.

From his point of view, Cimber had two, actually three, ways to go. One, there was a hallway to the left, which was closed with a door. Whether the door was locked or not was a mystery, but the hallway to the right was not blocked by a door. His third option was to go back the way he came, and get out of there, but he obviously wasn't going to choose that option.

He decided to see if the door to the left was locked or not. If it was, he would have to go the other way, because he was no good with a pick. He got to the door, and turned the iron handle. He pushed and cursed the door as it stuck to it's frame. It was locked. Well, they couldn't of gone that way. None of those names were good with a lock pick either, so they must of gone through the other hallway. However, locked doors usually mean that something of importance is behind them. I'll have to bust through it and take a look if the need arises.

The orange light produced by his torch slammed into the Ayelid rock and bounced off, creating even a bigger sphere of light. This could be both good and bad, because it made him an easier target to spot as well as the same for his enemies. He quickly made his way to the other side of the atrium, not wanting to get caught if a patrol took through the bridge on the wall to the left of him.

The loud steps of his armor echoed through the room, causing Cimber to wince. That's what infiltration is all about, speed vs. sound. A lot of speed equals a lot of sound, and small speed equals small sound. Some, like the ones bathed in the art of thievery and assassination, could probably cheat the system and get a high speed and small sound, but Cimber was a warrior. He would have to stick to the Warrior Law of Physics, which he did not like at all. He would rather float around, and shoot fire from his fingertips, but he knew that wasn't going to happen.

The corridor that lie in front of him was a lot like the one near the entrance, except much more narrow, and it was really dark. Cimber tried to get in, but he couldn't fit his bulky armor through it. He was reduced to sidestep through the corridor, which was very uncomfortable. Not only literally, but he was uncomfortable with being so vulnerable. If someone decided to show up and fight him there, he could do only so little to defend himself.

He cursed when his hand slipped and he dropped his torch. The torch fell to the ground, and a city of sparks flew from the fire. They danced in the air, and Cimber reached over to pick the torch up. He couldn't reach it in his armor, so he conceded to kick the torch across the corridor floor. Sparks rose up with each kick, and Cimber smiled when the corridor opened into a wider area. The corridor continued on for a long while, but at least it was wider.

Cimber quickly put his shortsword into a sheath which lay on his left hip, and retrieved his Daedric Longsword from the sheath on his right.

Long ago, when Cimber was a boy, his mentor taught him to be ambidextrous, which means that you are as able with your left hand as you are with your right. Meaning that he could use a different sheath on either hip, and he could wield a sword with either his right or left hand.

Cimber picked up his torch and held in his right hand while he held his sword in his left. He broke into a brisker pace, and walked along the corridor faster. His heart sank as his foot dipped into the ground; he had stepped on a pressure plate. His first instinct made him hit the ground, throwing his arms over his neck. However, only the hollow sound of air blowing out of holes followed the pressure plate. Cimber, thinking it was gas, got up and ran backwards toward the narrow corridor. Usually the poisonous gas inside Ayelid ruins were green, and Cimber slowly walked up to inspect it. He inspected the wall, and saw that there were small holes in the walls; a dart trap. The trap didn't work because it was already set off?Which means?

Cimber looked down to see a huge splotch of red. It looked faded, though, as if it had been there for a while. The splotch produced a trail of blood that ran up the corridor. This could mean one of two things, the Marauders either got the body and dragged it away, or the guild member could of crawled to safety. Either way, he was dead by now.

Cimber dropped once again as he heard muffled voices from further along the hallway, and a pair of footsteps running to meet Cimber. Cimber dropped his torch, and once again sparks rose from the flame. He held his sword in both his hands, ready to fight anything the darkness ahead produced.
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Unfourtunatly, I cannot visit here anymore. I will have time to keep up my story, but that it is. Sorry to all.

These are great! I couldn't stop till I read all the posts! More, More!!!

Good stuff so far. Only one question: How does Karina trace her lineage back to her grandmother? I was under the impression that both sons died and one of them didn't like women nearly as much as he did men. Not a big deal and by no means a slight or a reason to alter your story that you're doing so well on. I was just interested in the back story.

Cheers.