hey, i was thinking, what are some good tes related insults? cross race insults, funny, random, etc.


ive got a few

you have less whits on you than sheogorath himself.
mud crabs are more attractive than you.
do the nine hate you or were you born this ugly?
stupid cat.
(argonian to a khajiit) wanna have a diving contest?
hey cat, i think i hear some dogs coming
go back to your tree, stupid elf
by the nine, your stupid

This is great. I love these threads.

Now I remember your face! I saw something like it while washing down the hindquarters of a guar.

Valen Dreth is the master of racial insults.

Also, why do Khajiits like their butts?

Not sure why they like them, but they lick them to get the taste of their cooking out of their mouths.

:o where have I heard that before?

Leyawiin?

(to an orc) "you have a grass stain on your face"

(To an Imperial) Do I need to complete the forms in triplicate to insult you?

"Scrib-humping sack of pus"

"Your momma's so old, she fought at Red Mountain!"

"Is that your face, or did a Dremora step on your head?"



.....uh, that's all I could come up with.

Why do Wood Elves screw their sisters?

Because sometimes their mothers have to make dinner.

Ow! That last one is a doozy!

Common Khajiit insult: I may be on skooma, but when it wears off you'll still be stupid.

It's better to burn the ship than let Bretons crew it. They're too dumb to sail.

I don't think all Dark Elves are idiots, but what's my opinion against everyone elses?

Orcs don't know the meaning of fear! Or many other words...

:rofl: I like the last one most.

Why do Wood Elf women screw men of other races?
Cause Wood Elf males are too busy screwing each other.


:bolt:

(P.S. nothing against homosixuals, or wood elves.)

[edit]
Why do Dunmer males make excellent sailors?

Because wood floats.

This thread has inspired me to write a book of insults called Common Insults of the Dunmer for my mod. Here's all of the ones I've come up with:

I knew I recognized your face from somewhere. I saw something like it while washing the hindquarters of a guar.

Either your mother was an Orc, or one has smashed in your face.

With a face like that you should be safe in the wilderness. It would terrify even a pack of wild nix-hounds.

You'd best take a guild guide to the next town. With a smell like that a siltstrider wouldn't carry you on its back.

Your mother must have had an affair with an Orc. It's the only way to explain the depths of your stupidity.

I may be drunk on Mazte, but tomorrow I'll be sober and you'll still be stupid.

You gas on like a speared netch.

I've met cliffracers that have annoyed me less.

A slave has better manners than you.

Why don't you go home to your wife? Better yet, I'll go home to your wife, and outside of the improvement, she won't notice any difference.

I'd sleep with you, but there's just not enough sujamma in the world.

I may have slept with every man in the village, but for you I'll make an exception.

Tear out all the pages of Boethiah's Pillow Book; That's what he was like in bed.

You're of so little importance you couldn't even buy a writ of execution for yourself.

We can only hope he gains enough rank to warrant an assassination.

I see you're a master of quotation. Memorizing the Book of Riddles is a great substitution for wit.

Your idiocy would test the patience of Vehk himself.