I know how you feel. I too am crazy about my best friend, but relationships are complicated, and I would love to ask her out, but I find it better if we remained as friends. In relationships, you need your 'space' and well, with friends, it doesnt really matter, does it? By the way, anybody know how to say 'no' without hurting their feelings? This girl asked me out, but I'm not interested.

I highly recommend whoever post for relationship things to use the search function first. You should have enough hits to answer your very first question.

same process different legos

Well in the end all relationships turn out two ways. You get married, or you break up. Which do you think happens more often? My point being, that you will probably break up with this girl at some point. So that could definitely leave a scar on the friendship for a while. You have to ask yourself, is she the one? Would I risk ruining our friendship because I think she's it? If it gets to the point where it's completely utterly obvious that she likes you back that's when I would make my move. But for now, you might want to wait a bit.

I remember asking one of my friends out (and what a bad job I did of it) for two months things were a bit awkward with her (as they surely would be) but from then to this day she is one of my closest friends I even did the formal with her after my fiasco of asking her out.

Though as others have said, It's really up to you, but one bit of advice I can give is, don't be to blunt, there's confidence, then there is idiocy i was in the second boat

Doesn't mean a thing. Or it could mean everything. Generally, as a girl, I can say it's more in how you say it and in what circumstance. She could seriously just enjoy talking to you, and thinks of you as a good friend and wanted you to know that. Girls are pretty subtle about these sorts of things, usually.

If you ask her out and she says yes, you might have a great relationship. If that ends, you'll most likely not have even a friendship anymore. In most cases, being friends with your ex doesn't work. Of course, there are a lot of exceptions ("my aunt Sally and her husband had a friend who had a friend who had a dog whose previous owner's daughter stayed friends with their ex and in the end they fell in love again and got married!") and it depends a lot on the circumstances you break up in. If you ask her out and she says no, you might have an awkward phase but it'll most likely be workaoundable, since you're already good friends. If she says she enjoys talking to you, she probably wants to stay friends with you, and will stay friends even if you ask her out and she doesn't feel the same way. So you either a.) lose her as a friend; b.) find the love of your life or c.) strain your relationship a little / a lot.

Pretty much, I'd say it boils down to whether you value your friendship or the prospect of a relationship with her more.

JFAHO


Turn that nervousness into excitement. I still get butterflies in the stomach when I see my girlfriend after she's been away a few weeks, and we've been goin' steady for 5 years. Nervous is good


Masters are just for chicks who can't get Patriarchs.


"That guy th3undon3on3 on BGSF got back together with his ex and they... Well, they're not getting married any time soon, but it's still going good."

Not to show off or anything, but that happened to me last week. I told her that I liked her a lot (Hey, it's better than saying that I fancied her. Around here, holding hands is the equivalent of marriage, with kissing being the equivalent of a good six life)
She was really flattered, but since we've got exams going on, she doesn't want to pursue anything. So, we know that we like each other, but we're too busy to do anything about it. :shrug: We're still really good friends, it could be way worse. *recalls last attempt at asking a girl out.* :facepalm:
And we've known each other for 7 years now. But that doesn't count per se as far as relationships/feelings go, since we were both 11 when we met.

Speaking as a woman, if i'd known someone five years and they'd never made a move previously, I'd assume they weren't interested and I'd have moved them into the 'friend group' already.

I have lots of male friends who I spend hours talking to/would potentially travel round the world with but who don't feel anything for me and I don't for them. :shrug:

I'm not trying to be negative but I would want to have pretty good evidence that she liked me back before I'd potentially make the whole thing awkward before asking her out.

How were you planning on asking her out? If it were me, I wouldn't say "want to go on a date with me?", rather, I'd just ask if she wants to see a film/go to the pub for a bit (might not be relevant, don't know how old you are)/anything you usually do - but just don't invite anyone else. It doesn't have to have romantic implications from the start. That way, you're spending time together and seeing how well you click without displaying outright how you feel which may make things awkward. It might be that after some time together you realise it was just a bit of confusion and you really just think she's a great friend, or maybe something will develop between the two of you. I think when it's just two people hanging out it's really easy to tell if there's a bit of sixual tension lol. I've had a few boyfriends (and many began with a platonic friendship) and I've never been asked or asked outright myself if someone would like to "go out/date" me. It's always something that either happens or it doesn't. I'd also add that dating a friend doesn't have to end in disaster - you might avoid each other for a bit if you were to break up, but unless something went horribly wrong (e.g. cheating), you normally end up friends again, or at least that's what I've found. Good luck!

Do it dude, if you feel that way about her than you might as well. Better than being a part of the BGSF lonely hearts club drinking yourself to sleep at night.

Ask her out via E-mail and if she says no reply half an hour later saying that it was a friend (possibly made up) who did it as a joke and you haven't lost anything either way.
This is not the ideal way but if you really are this scared it's worth a shot.

I agree with this.

No. C'mon. Women don't appreciate men with no balls whatsoever, and "that was just my friend" will make her feel really stupid about thinking that you were serious.

I did say that it wasn't ideal but if he is really scared then the only way he can ask her out is via deception.
He really shouldn't do it but it is a last ditch attempt if he wants to.

1. Find out if she has a boyfriend. As one of her friends you should have no problem finding out about other relationships.
2. Plan your words before asking her out. Also have a plan B with you, 'cause you'll never know what will happen.
3. Ask her out.
4. If she says "yes", then congrats. If she says "no", then just try to be friends.


And don't even think about "getting some" on first date :nono:

What if this happens though? Say you send the email, but she just hasn't got around to checking it, then you send the it was my friend thing. She may open it up, get excited then feel like an idiot. I think if he were to do this, texting would be much better because you can even say I left me phone at (insert friend's house) the next day if you get no reply.

Honestly though, do you really want your potential relationship to be built on something underhanded like this?

No I don't but as I said before it is for situations when you are so scared it is impossible to ask her and by the way the point was to wait until she replied and if she said no send the friend thing. Anyway it was meant for testing the waters between the relationship.
I wrote the first thing while sleep deprived and after watching the big bang theory series and it seemed like a good idea at the time. I now realise it is a ridiculous idea.

Sending an e-mail is one of the more ridiculous things I've heard on how to start a relationship. Seriously, don't even try it. I can see her and her mates laughing their panties off for weeks.

But wait...that can be a good thing actually...!

As long as it isn't a bad break up you should still be friends, although there will be an awkward week or so after the break up... Or at least that's how it went with me.

I only asked out 1 girl in my 16 years of existence, and she turned me down since she just broke up with her old boy friend and needed a break so I was like "ok whatevs" and we are still good friends it was just kind of awkward for a while There was one other girl who I had a very close relationship to but we weren't officially going out, and open relationships don't last very long so that failed too. Idk why I'm telling my stories though I suppose you want advice? Well, lets be honest a lot of guys are in relationships for the bangin' as much as they deny it, its just a normal urge I'll admit its the main reason I got into an open relationship a while back, but you sound like you actually like her as a person and she must like you as well. If she's that nice of a girl you should act on your oppurtunity before some [censored] who just wants to get in bed with her takes her.

I think sometimes with these threads you should have to include how old you are along with your post.

Not just in this thread but I often see a 17/18 year old asking for advice and often see advice that looks like it comes from a 12 year old...

Creepy


And Emz is probably the best person to listen to here.

Relax, guys. I decided I am not going to ask her out. I don't want to risk losing a really good friendship with her.

Mods can lock this if they want.

My first girlfriend asked me out by e-mail. We were together for 2 and a half years :shrug: