I still don't like the fairy tale style ending. But you seem to really want it. Other than that it seems alright, but it could be boring seeing as everything is going in one, preset line: Someone looking for something and encounters dangers along the way. Until they finally get to the predictable end.
I still don't like the fairy tale style ending. But you seem to really want it. Other than that it seems alright, but it could be boring seeing as everything is going in one, preset line: Someone looking for something and encounters dangers along the way. Until they finally get to the predictable end.
it bounces around in time. Also the happy ending won't be obvious. It is to us since everything is spelled out. But I want the feeling that this is a suicide mission or even perhaps that his love is dead or the utopia could be a lie. While watching it, you wouldn't know if the rumors are true or not, plus people keep giving slightly different info on it. Whether its real or not is the big mystery.
Awesome! Thats much more original and interesting! But there should still be a climix before the ending. Like him finding something of her's and believe she is dead.
Awesome! Thats much more original and interesting! But there should still be a climix before the ending. Like him finding something of her's and believe she is dead.
I was thinking he gets attacked and overwhelmed near the end, and almost dies, but perhaps some Enclave or BoS come in and save him. Making the time its taken him to get to her even longer and causing the fear of her or him being dead even greater.
I was thinking he gets attacked and overwhelmed near the end, and almost dies, but perhaps some Enclave or BoS come in and save him. Making the time its taken him to get to her even longer and causing the fear of her or him being dead even greater.
Or (seeing as you were talking about him being saved by someone) he saves someone, like a little girl, who is obsessed with the utopia idea too. So she eventually leads him there.
Or (seeing as you were talking about him being saved by someone) he saves someone, like a little girl, who is obsessed with the utopia idea too. So she eventually leads him there.
Ya, one of the things I've figured out is that long interludes away from the main story are boring. To write anyway... I mean unless you're planning on making an entire season out of it... I mean movie....