Is anybody tired of retcon in things like TES, and other lore based things?
I actually like retcons. Every ret con really just leaves you with two worlds: the world presented before the retcon, and the one after the retcon. Retcons can never take away what was already there. Instead, they just give you more choices.
We have to fill in gaps for ourselves on trivial things now?
Yup, and I think that's a good thing. A story needs to hammer out certain details, but for the little things, its usually best to leave it up to the audience. What you or I fill the gaps with is usually better than anything the writers could come up with, because you and I are going to come up with something to satisfy ourselves, and what satisfies me won't always satisfy you. There's also the frontier problem: every explanation just raises more questions.
I think the intense lore is the main attraction for these kind of games for people
That's absolutely wrong.
Who wants a fan base full of idiots?
Who specifically wants that sort of fan-base? Nobody.
Why cares whether or not their fans are idiots? Nobody.