I highly suggest you make your game searches less specific as if you REALLY want to join a not full server, on THIS map, with THIS rule set, etc etc. All instantly - its going to narrow down the selection. By narrowing it down you also open yourself up to the fact that there will be connections that are far away.
Well you can do this, but the problem is we are still running into lag, and rubberbanding.
SD needs to patch host searching system.