"Jim wake up time to head to the citadel for more power armor training." said Jims father sid.
"Can scraps come to?" asked Jim "He'll behave."
"Now you know Brotherhood rules."
"Please dad please?"
"No means no son."
"OK!"

SIX hours later

"Im home!" Screamed Jim as he walked in the door.
"Get him and his dog!" Screamed the two slavers "And put his dad in vault 87."

Ugh....This is none other, than a flame enducing spambot. You took the name 'Scraps' from one of my older fanfics (that I really hate). I will laugh if this was a serious attempt to create a story.

@Skippy
This story is a joke. Not an actual story. It's also just a name, don't need to take everything too seriously.

@The guy who made the story
This is a brilliant story. 10/10. I love the attention to detial, the amazingly desriptive words and the well thought out and BRILLIANT storyline. I'd love to see any more fanfics you have instore for us lucky readers!

Sarcasm much?

i thinkz tis iz lik teh best storeh EVAR! u type evn betar than me

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Lol

Thanks

It has a couple of problems: It's short, lack of detail, lack of grammar/punctuation/spelling I believe? If you can get up on that then you'll get Skippy of your back. Then again, if Skippy's not on your back then you have to have a damn good story... Come to think of it, Skippy's never commented on my story... ????????

To put this blunt, it's sort of a what a seven year old would of wrote when asked to write a short story in an English Lesson.

Sounds about right.

I wrote better stuff than this when I was seven years old.

So did I, but it's still what a child around that age would write, he even ended the story pretty much with going home. I was terrible for doing that when I was about that age.

CHAPTER 2: Escape from the box

"Where am I?"Said jim now waking up in a strange place.
"Your in the box kid." said a voice from behind him. Jim quickly turned around to find a Ghoul and a man standing behind him.
"You nearly gave the boy a heart attack argyole." exclaimed the man.
"I'm Dashwood,Daring dashwood and this is my Ghoul man servent argyole." he said in a firm voice"Now to get these things off."
"So little faith boss."replied Argyole"I can get this slaver junk off blindfolded ."
Clank "There's mine. Your turn boss."Clank"Now yours kid." Clank.
" Now argoyle lets go."said dash wood"I'll head back to get the girl we came in with you take the kid. We'll meet back at rivet city."

I haven't? Really? Well, then I think I have to now!


And for the story. Sinfully short, spell names with capitals, and thats pretty much it,

Did you just take the story off of GNR and make it your own chapter?

Win.

Wow uuummm, yeah. :clap: Perfect can't wait to read more. Okay no not really. :slap:

EDIT:


Oh wow I just noticed that

What is going on here? Any more spam, unnecessary posts or general crap and it will invoke the bear's wrath. :stare:

Aren't you supposed to be a cuddly bear?

To the story: Please, for the love of all that is literature, learn to write. Go back to third grade English and take that class again. Not trying to be mean but...wow....

Can't you people take a joke?

Was it really? Huh, huh!

People in this part of the forum tend to take Fan Fics seriously. While they/we still take jokes and have fun there is just a difference between joking and just pure spam/stupidity. Try writing a serious fan fic and I'm sure you will find people are very nice and helpful. You've been warned by a mod so I suggest you take in that warning.

What does warned by a mod mean? see, i'm new to this so I don't know the terms.

Mod=Moderator

I know mod means moderator but why was I warned?

This is a moderator who patrols the forums and keeps people in line so to speak. They are able to lock threads and warn people and or ban them indefinitely. Stay on their good side and you will do just fine. For more info I suggest you look at the fan fiction rules and the forum rules posted at the top of the page.