Imperial troopers don't care if you slash Thalmor agents in front of them. Sometimes they will even join the fight on your side Happened to me once. I was wandering peacefully when the combat music starts. I see three elves charging at me, one clad in Thalmor robes. I fight a bit then retreat when my health falls low. I start kiting them around in hope of finding a troll or a big bear to distract them long enough for me to concentrate on one. I ran into a patrol of imperial soldiers who unsheathe their sword when they see me. "I'm done" I think. Instead, they race past me and attack the Thalmor agents. It was a very satisfying moment.

You can actually choose any speech option and they still attack!

I like to go on werewolf killing sprees and the Thalmor are my favorite targets. God I hate those stuck up high elves. Aldmeri Dominion? Pshh...Dovahkin is doing his part in ending that nonsense.

I did a quest involving one Septimus Sigmus and I think it must have been bugged because I had to kill him at the end to get the relevant item (he is supposed to self combust or something I think). Then as I am leaving Dawnstar I am ambushed by three thugs. Once I have tickled them with my sword I find a note on one of them from SS saying I should be dealt with for my theft - how did the very dead Mr Sigmus even know I had taken his item let alone then get up and go and hire some thugs to take care of me????

Recently, me and my Khajit companion were exploring a Dwarven Ruin. Turns out some Falmer were also patrolling te ruins. Anyways, me being all sneaky sneaky I get up close and initiate a power attack...

Suddenly I'm watching my dagger slitting the throat of my Khajit buddy and the Falmer standing there like whut?

The funny thing about the horseman ... I was running to Dragonreach at night, and a spectral horse runs by. I sprinted after it hoping to hop on it and claim it for my own. Couldn't get it, so I gave up and headed back. About 15 seconds later, the spectral horseman comes running along the road after it.

Sneaking around in a Forsworn fort. I pickpocket a Briarheart and see a Briarheart in his inventory. I snag it. He falls over dead. Now, THAT is a talented pickpocket.

There was some sort of glitch with a dragon corpse that had one spontaneously appear in the middle of Whiterun. As I'm standing there looking at it, a guy walks up to me and asks if I had heard about the dragon attack in Helgen.

Something similar happened to me, accept the farmer was walking toward an area that had a pack of frost trolls lurking about. I watch him walk off into the distance, and I guess his cow had a bit more sense then him as the cow is the first to turn tail and run while the farmer keeps going convinced he is heading towards a giant camp. The cow made it out alive, the farmer....not so much.

What made it so funny was the fact that there was no giant camp even in the area.

These are the funniest type of events for me, too.

I finished a big battle in Whiterun - won't spoil it for you, I don't think - when we were finished with the fight, it is kind of the end of the matter when the principles are standing around talking to each other about what just happened, when one of the troopers who was part of the fight walks up and starts talking while the principles are still giving their grandiose speeches, this trooper looks down at a dead body and says a couple of different things along the lines of, "I am going to find whoever did this to you". I started laughing, and realize I am missing the speech! This trooper was part of the battle, and likely killed the guy on the floor himself! Too funny.

I was sneaking around an inn breaking into rooms and pickpocketing people and stealing stuff while they were sleeping. I went into one room and saw the npc floating over the bed spinning around in circles like she was possessed, or Trent Reznor in that NIN video Closer, and I just backed up and shut the door. I'm a thief not an exorcist and I'm not dealing with that lol.

Minor spoiler about daedric quest

I was wandering around the forest near helgen when I came upon a rabbit poking at the corpse of a bandit. Not thinking much of it, I walk over to check the body for loot and the rabbit scampers off as usual. As soon as I'm done I notice another dead bandit farther down the road with another rabbit poking around his corpse. Thinking it must just be a coincidence I jog over to check the body but before I can get there I notice a THIRD dead bandit with yet ANOTHER rabbit sniffing at the corpse! Now I'm starting to think this must be some crazy killer bunny scenario set up by the devs, so I start looking around for another dead bandit when I come across a half dead bandit poking at the corpse of a dead rabbit. I'm loling pretty hard at this point so I just walk right up to the bandit to see if he says anything about it but he just wacks me upside the head with his war-hammer. I have no idea what random series of events could have caused this but it was definitely one of the strangest things I have ever seen.



Another time I came across a pack of wolves chasing around a elk on the way to Markarth, and on a whim, I decided to help it out. A few carefully placed arrows later the wolves were dead and I was too busy looting their hides to notice the elk was running right at me, so once I'm done I look up and find myself face to face with this huge elk! Startled me so bad I nearly fell out of my chair! I started to backpedal and fumble around for a minute before I realized it was not trying to attack me. It just stood there for a long while, staring at me, then suddenly it "honked" at me, for lack of a better word (you know that high pitched squeaky deer call) like it was thanking me and ran off. Its little things like this that really make this game awesome.

This might be a bit lengthy so bear with me. I'm exploring an old fort outside Riften, and upon entering spot a robed figure. Draw my bow and peg it square on. "Hey watch it, I'm on your side!" Huh? Turns out it's a young witch named IIlia and she needs some help. So do the little help quest with her and at the end pick up my first set of Ebony army , HUZZAH, ( I don't smith the stuff , I EARN IT !!) But now I'm overweight and thinking , crap no strength potions left, what to do. But wait, Illia can be my companion. That works, I shift over a set of ebony boots, an enchanted circlet and a glass daggar to her and we make our way over to Rifkin to re-stock.

I've not used a companion before, I always roll alone , (Lydia is a HOUSE jarl in the truest sense) but I'm thinking , lets give this a try, see what happens. The momemt we leave Rifkin we are immediately attacked by 3 frost spiders. NO sweat , I'll one shot them with my bow like I always do. Ha.... Illia flashes by me and ice bolts the first two before I can even notch an arrow. The key word here though is FLASHES! Ilia is wearing ebony boots , the enchanted tiara and brandishing the glass daggar. NOTHING ELSE! She's a dead ringer for wonder woman complete with the golden skivvies! Total WTF moment, jaw dropped for about 10 seconds, then couldn't stop laughing for 5 minutes. Wife came in, asked what was so funny, then spotted Illia and assumed I WAS THE GUILTY PARTY. O-O

Singing a random, funny, made up song playing on "The Dragon Born Comes" from the game
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xcxwOyXAXM&feature=plcp&context=C29893UDOEgsToPDskL16ET1gcT3Xbo6ivQIZR6i

Aw, shame he didn't take it to the knee! He would've been the perfect Whiterun guard!

Dunno bout yall but sometimes I can't decipher what certain symbols on the map. This one time I knew I was getting close to something so I cast Muffle and go into sneak mode and crept up to whatever it was. There was a graveyard and some old church and what looked like some black robed figures but I couldn't tell for sure because of the thick fog and tall grass all over that area. As an assassin I figured I'd get the first hit in on this pack of goons and managed to execute one before I was discovered. After a strangely brief battle with these "cultists" I looked up past the church to see the gate to a town...

I just slaughtered a priest and the attendance of a funeral...

Dead Dancing Draugrs?

I too had a moment where I was nearly startled out of my seat.

I had just descended a snowy mountainside in sneak mode when I got to a flatter area near my objective. Suddenly, the "sneak eye" flashes "Detected" and I'm like "by what?"

Before I could turn and look or anything, I hear a bear roar and get whacked in the back. I let loose an "Ahh!" and turned around to see a snow bear right behind me. I must have come down the mountain right next to him and didn't notice him. Scared the crap out of me. After I killed it, I had to pause the game and get my bearings for a bit before moving on with my objective.




Yeah, you really need to be careful in this game with NPCs you find outside of cities. A few times I've mistaken the Khajiit caravan for bandits or other undesirables on the horizon and took them out with my bow, only to realize who they were after the fact......reload that last save!

My friend was playing and a Dragon came into view, the Dragons animation was all sorts of messed up. It was swinging its wings left to right (Instead of flapping them downward) and its whole body was moving all over the place. It was slowly making its way to my friend when suddenly it just started flying strait into the sky. It went completely vertical then disappeared. Later on he came out of a building and a dragon came flying down from the sky dead. He then absorbed the soul. We laughed for a while with this one.

You know those three drunks you often meet on the road? Well, I ran into them again however this time one is missing, the other one lies dead on the road and the third one is dancing naked, drinking mead and having a good time.

[img]http://i.imgur.com/PL4yE.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i.imgur.com/rH3xU.jpg[/img]

[img]http://i.imgur.com/Qtz4N.jpg[/img]

Fighting an Elder dragon near a giant camp. Somehow a Mammoth got in the way of the dragon's flight during a low swoop. Next thing I see is the mammoth taking a ride on a dragon. Wasn't a long ride as it fell to it's death as it turned around.

At least now I know dragon flight is possible.

Nooope! I met Chuck Testa in Skyrim.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbaEXn14o3M

Out of the Oven and into the Frying Pan

first random dragon was in the Ivorstead region.

This thing starts kicking my ass as I hide behind a rock. Needing to find shelter quickly to regain my composure and gather my resources I run into a nearby cave.
Mind you the dragon is right behind me I just barely made it in.

relieved that I got away I turn around and HOLY [censored] THERE'RE TWO CAVE BEARS CHARGING AT ME!

I run back out and am instantly swallowed whole by the dragon with one of his finishers.

talk about being caught between a rock and a hard place.

i iz dr4gonb0rn gud

I go to the college of Winterhold and talk to the High Elf that forces you to take the entrance test. Mid-conversation I feel my controller vibrate. But I figure it's nothing.
Me: Do I have to take the test?
High Elf : Yes, all initiates are required
*From Winterhold*: IT'S A DRAGON, RUN, A DRAGON IS ATTACKING WINTERHOLD
Me: Fine, I'll take your stupid test
High Elf: Good, all Mages should know blah blah blah yakkity yakkity magical jargon
*From Winterhold*:: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, *sounds of a dragon breathing fire and consuming the defenseless nords can be heard*
Me: *Casts spell* There, can I enter the college now?
High Elf: Excellent, you'll make a find addition to the college of Winterhold, right this way.

I follow the high elf as the sounds of slaughter and destruction slowly fade away.

I had this happen to me the other day:

I'm walking down a road when an assassin jumps out of a bush and charges at me. A second later a saber cat jumps out onto the road behind him. He turns and attacks the saber cat screaming, "He's mine!"

Later I realized that it was a random AI line, meaning that the cat was his kill. But at the time it sure seemed that he was ticked that the saber cat might kill me before he did.

I just stood and watched. The assassin won the fight and then continued his attack on me. Sadly I took him out with an arrow before he ever closed the distance.

A weird one happened to me last night. I had given Riften control to the Imperials and while I was there Imperial soldiers went around killing all the Riften guards. A few minutes later one of them stops me and asks me if I saw who killed the guard. Talk about a short memory

I can't think of many off the top of my head, but one does occur to me.

I remember visiting a Vigilant of Stendarr outpost. After awhile of listening to them regurgitate their "holier than thou" hegemonic dogma at me, I returned as a Werewolf. Butchered the majority of them, but failed to get the last one, as I couldn't fit through the door of the basemant. Didn't stop me scaring the crap out of her with my howls, however.

I found it amusing that they spoke in their lofty, resolute tones regarding Daedra and the undead, but when presented with an opportunity to practically apply themselves to the role they preach, they'd rather sit in the basemant, presumably defacating in their undergarments. WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOWWWWWWWWWWW HUHH

I now make a habit of collecting their pendants as trophies. Become somewhat of a hobby of mine.

Sorry, I gotta. You made me think of George W. Bush and The Boondock Saints with that one... it's "Out of the Frying pan and into the fire". I've also heard it, "Out of the pot and into the fire."


So, my funny: early on, I got to that awesome bridge spanning a river with two towers on either side. It's filled with bandits. I snipe a few, but one comes running at me. I'm pretty low level so I run. The bandit, a female in this case, says, all frustrated and pissed off sounding, "Why won't you die so I can take your stuff????!!!!" My wife and I busted out laughing. I turned and killed her using the shield quite a bit, but we were still laughing after her body hit the ground.