I use a Skyforge Steel Greatsword with a Burn Enchantment, so every time it goes into the kill animation, my guy rams the sword through the guy and picks him up. Now the thing is the guy getting killed looks like hes giving you a hug, except this hug sets you on fire. My warrior looks like he's killing people with fire hugs.

Bandit jumps forward to strike me as I shoot a killing arrow into his head.

Triple backflip somersault.

His body lands next to his buddy who looks alerted as he says: "I think I heard something."

Must...hold...laugh...at work...


Fixed.



Dont know why this had me cackling for 2 min.


God knows how much i wish that happens to me. Lucky bastard.

Here's mine:
Just left Dragonsreach and i'm heading to have mead at the Bannered Mare (RP stuff).
Then this girl directs this words to me: "You dont scare me, even if you are my elder".
The first time i hear this i'm like w00t and reply "Well, you should be" and enter the tavern.

As i'm leaving the town, on a dark alley, here she comes again with her "not-afraid-of-u" thing.

"Hahahaha, okay, tough girl, go by your day."

As she turns her back, i pull my dagger and let the throat-slit-animation go.

I start teabagging her when this boy shows up and screams something like "AAAAAAAH, SOMEONE HELP!" and i'm all "NO, NO, NO. NOT WHAT U THINKING".

I was once again wandering aimlessly and a hunter approaches out of nowhere and runs right up to me. He asks if I can cure his disease because he just got bit by a vampire. When I told him I couldn't, he said, "Well if you can't help me, get out of my way. I have to find a PRIEST!"

I was fighting a dragon high up a mountain. I walked towards him, ready to give the death blow and instead he picks me up in his mouth and shakes me back and forth. My legs were flailing around outside his mouth and then he lets go and I go flying over a cliff. Best death ever!

A bandit during a dual-wield decapitation animation:

"You'll be so much easier to rob when you're dea- *slice*"

Me: "So how did that work out for you then?"

Reminds of a time long, long ago in one of my first playthroughs of Morrowind. I had just started the game and swimming around the coast near Seyda Neen. I had attracted 5 or so slaughterfish and couldn't take them myself, so I fled into that inlet by the lighthouse. One of the spear-wielding Imperial Guards ran in to fight them and I just went about my business back on dry land. After wandering town a while, I come back to notice the guard surrounded by 4 dead slaughterfish with the last one at half health or so. I run in and finish that one off, and the help myself to all of the guards equipment. Very nice way to start.

Gotta love unexpected critter kills.

For some reason Lydia really wanted a pet undead cow.

http://cloud.steampowered.com/ugc/594703803972288185/328ECD57483B918AE7DE2695414259832435FF30/

LMFAO! That happens to me all too often and it's hilarious every time !

.

I had rescued some guy and had to lead him back to his house. As he followed me, we passed by a creek. He then began shouting out: "I'm not a afraid of you! You will never defeat me!" I look to see what the fuss is about and he's arguing with a fish in the stream. It was both hilarious and pathetic. He proceeded to go into the water swimming, trying to kill it but couldn't. My follower got tired of his nonsense and sent an arrow right through the fish and the rescued man was finally complacent.

As I am being dug out from the rubble I hear the little girls voice "I'm not cut out for manual labor"

Whenever a dragon is attacking and the guards say:

"Dragons you say?" not word for word btw

Just finished a battle with a dragon, went down to the Stormcloaks camp it attacked and looted the dead bodies. After going to the camp's quartermaster to sell the goods, I look back to where one of the bodies were, and saw a soldier next to it... Curious, I wandered over and saw this:

http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7007/6458100033_7503d8ed94_b.jpg

Skyrim comedy? Skyrim itself.

We all know the "...took an arrow to the knee" guards but I found a new one, though had to complete a quest related to Dark Brotherhood:

I know I'm enjoying a game when I find myself providing '80s-style action movie one-liners in response to events, such as when a mercenary jumped me and after I had whacked him a couple times he said, "Is that all you've got?" Killed him with the next dual-wield flurry and said, out loud, "No, THAT is all I've got."

Skyrim Comedy Song
Funny Fan Fiction
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xcxwOyXAXM&feature=plcp&context=C29893UDOEgsToPDskL16ET1gcT3Xbo6ivQIZR6i

A poor man′s last words before getting killed:
"DEATH IS HIGLY OVERRATED!!"

I literally had an arrow in my knee for 20 minutes, I couldn't stop laughing

This dragon crashed, mid crash hit a tree. The dragon went FLYING into the air, as it treated the tree as a slope.

Also, one time a mammoth fell out of the sky.

And the amazing Backwards flying dragon.

You know how at the beggining of the game the dragons arent so easy to kill. The blood dragons I mean. Than later on you get the improved armor and you can basically stand right in front of them and kill them. Not too long after that happened with me I get a dragon flying over head and eventually he lands and I'm like, good, lets get this over with cause IM on a mission. So Im shooting arrows and finally he swoops down. I charge right at him. Snap Snap Vooooooooom. Two bites and a blast of breath and I'm toast. It was then I realised it was an Elder dragon. LOL didnt know they had those.


I took along a lot of companions at the beggining cause I got killed so often when getting attacked by groups in dungeons. Lydia, the first person that ever accompainied me, comes up behind me just as I was finishing off what I didnt know was the last monster. I see something, spin around and off with her head. LOL she must have been really worn down. Never saw her again either. Most of the companions I get killed comeback later, lol.

I was in some dungeon where there is a ramp that curves up and to the left and its way up in the air. 5 people come to take you on, and I just couldn't get passed it. On the last try I killed the first one while the others were turning me into a pin cushion with arrows. I turned torward them and hit the shout button. LOL I had just gotten the third word of the force shout. Man, all 4 went flying right off the walkway and died below. I couldnt believe the distance and power lol. (It was funny to me)

Many many times people just passing by make comments that make me laugh, just can't think of them now.

There is a random NPC that offers a cow to giants. He was standing in the middle of their camp.

"I have it all under control, you should keep your distance." As the giant is inching toward him with his club raised.
"You should get out of here before they think you're part of the offering." Giant is really close now.
"Everything's fi--" WHAM! Giant slams him with club as the cow is walking around in circles all confuzzled.

This literally just happened. I was kicking a cauldron around trying to kill a shopkeep with it when it forced me under the map in Riften.


I am currently walking outside of Riften with nothing spawned. It's so peacefully lacking bandits or giant spiders.

I used to assassinate Thalmor patrols out in the wilderness until I realized you could goad them into attacking you instead without any bounty. All you have to do is when they ask if you know of any Talos worshipers is to...



And then promptly beat their intolerant behinds. I might add I support the Imperials, but I don't like Thalmor one bit.

Naked couriers following me around everywhere...