By Fallout-esque, I mean amusingly named perks, or perks with whacky effects, what would they be?

Infinite Wisdom: Summons Septimus Signus to dispense "wisdom" on your current task.

Death! Death! DEATH!
Horses gain increased health, stamina and can knock foes down when charging.

CHIM: Crashes game to desktop, erases saves.

Milk Drinker: Increased Speech skill but lowers combat skills.

I thought that was called playing as an Imperial

*rimshot*

I was trying to be nice to them.

Best one yet.

How Cheesy: Cheese Wedges are now able to be used as weapons and does slow-down bonus (due to constipation)

Wouldn't that increase combat skills?

Because milk = Calcium.
Calcium = Stronger bones.
Stronger bones = Stronger Person.

What was that noise?! - Gain ability/power to throw a stone to distract enemies.

Whats yours will be mine - Power to knock someone unconcious for 30min game time by smacking them over the head with a blackjack.

Bananas! - Spell to drain all player stamina and cause ragdoll, thus being able to roll down the side of a mountain (potentially unto death).

Oooo I like this one.

That reminds me of bears on Oblivion that would infinitely roll down hills and they'd make funny *thud* sounds while rolling.