TESV: Corrupt a Wish : The Elder Scrolls Series Discussion

» Fri Feb 18, 2011 11:22 pm

Granted, but you start the game out as an arena combatant with all of his limbs cut off
I wish for more species of mounts, like silt striders, giant wolves, etc.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:30 pm

Granted but they only sing about how much annoying mudcrabs are.

I wish combat was more deadly and realistic.

granted, but it kills you

I wish I had a better indistuctable computer for the game, try and mess that up

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:09 am

granted, but it kills you

I wish I had a better indistuctable computer for the game, try and mess that up

Granted, but it is only released as a board game, and your computer gets stolen when you go to buy it. The thief uses your stolen computer to steal your identity and you are bankrupt a day later with nothing but the TESV board game to your name. You go the police to report the crime, and while you are there the same thief steals your board game too.

My wish is the same as before, more mounts

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:09 am

[snip]

My wish is the same as before, more mounts

Granted, the mounts are mostly mud crabs, which move 1 foot per minute and for some reason delete all your save data when you unmount them.

My wish for a unique culture for the provence in tesv, not just a culture based from reality.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:38 am

granted, but the culture is entirely based around the improbable mating of Fargoth and the Adoring Fan, so every conversation is 90% "By Azura!"

I wish TES V had parkour movement added as an Acrobatics perk.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 5:05 am

granted, but this province and its culture worships the adoring fan. Everyone must wear their hair and speak exactly like the adoring fan, and greet everyone with by azura by azura. Every member of the province chants this same phrase in unison as a prayer 5 times a day.

I wish for medium armor and unarmored to be skills again... along with light and heavy armor

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:19 pm

granted, but this province and its culture worships the adoring fan. Everyone must wear their hair and speak exactly like the adoring fan, and greet everyone with by azura by azura. Every member of the province chants this same phrase in unison as a prayer 5 times a day.

I wish for medium armor and unarmored to be skills again... along with light and heavy armor

Wish granted, but now, all armor skills are based on SPEED.

I wish for the ability to play as a shopkeep.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 12:09 pm

Wish granted, but now, all armor skills are based on SPEED.

I wish for the ability to play as a shopkeep.

granted, but you are robbed and murdered repeatedly by masked adventurers in daedric armor who, frankly, just feel like killing you for the rag doll effects

im hoping for some awesome easter eggs

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 9:23 am

I wish TES V had parkour movement added as an Acrobatics perk.

granted, but this causes acrobatics and all other game movements to only be possible using playstation move and xbox Kinect

I wish for the ability to play as a shopkeep.

granted, but a glitch occurs where whenever you try to display your goods by grabbing them, you are arrested for theft

I wish for teleportation and levitation to be brought back

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:29 am

granted, but you are robbed and murdered repeatedly by masked adventurers in daedric armor who, frankly, just feel like killing you for the rag doll effects

im hoping for some awesome easter eggs

Granted. The easter eggs corrupt the game files when found and end up completely ruining your computer.

I wish I could think of a wish for the game that couldn't possibly backfire on me.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 5:18 am

im hoping for some awesome easter eggs

granted, every dark elf can now only attack by throwing painted kwama eggs at their enemies

I wish for teleportation and levitation (like my other post)

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:17 am

granted, every dark elf can now only attack by throwing painted kwama eggs at their enemies

I wish for teleportation and levitation (like my other post)

Granted but levatation is permanent, and thus keeps you from entering buildings, caves, or ever sleeping.

I want beards!

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:36 pm

Granted but levatation is permanent, and thus keeps you from entering buildings, caves, or ever sleeping.

I want beards!

Granted, but your character has a manliness deficiency. Thus rendering him incapable of growing a beard. Nords also constantly make fun of you because of this.

I wish I could be a bounty hunter.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:43 am

granted but u can only play as Jengo Fet from starwars, and you end up getting your head cut off by a Jedi 3 minutes after you start the game.

I wish stealth is exactly like in the thief games

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:26 pm

Granted, but your character has a manliness deficiency. Thus rendering him incapable of growing a beard. Nords also constantly make fun of you because of this.

I wish I could be a bounty hunter.

Granted, but the ESRB has forced Beth to make all scenes of violence blacked out and all weapons must be pink.

I want to be able to make my own weapons.

Whoops, too slow:

Posted Today, 09:23 PM
granted but u can only play as Jengo Fet from starwars, and you end up getting your head cut off by a Jedi 3 minutes after you start the game.

I wish stealth is exactly like in the thief games

Granted, but you can still only drag the bodies as quick as you could in Oblivion and as such are always caught hiding the evidence. That and the fences only have 110 gold on them so there's no point in stealing anything.

I still want to be able to make my own weapons.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 1:35 am

...snip...

I still want to be able to make my own weapons.

Granted, but even with a 100 blacksmith skill, the greatest weapon you can ever craft is a sword that breaks after ten uses and does 6 damage, so the whole thing becomes pointless when you can just buy better stuff *cough*alchemy*cough*

I wish for hunger and hydration bars, like in FONV ^^

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 12:38 am

I wish for hunger and hydration bars, like in FONV ^^

Granted, but you are forced to only play the game in "super pig squeal hardcoe mode" meaning that not only do you have to constantly eat, drink and sleep to survive, but the drops of sweat which collect in the groin of your armor add to your total weight, meaning you quickly become over encumbered.

I wish ninja throwing stars were back.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 10:04 am

I wish ninja throwing stars were back.

Granted, but you can't throw them. They qualify as a blade weapon, and have less range than your actual fists.

I wish that Elder Scrolls V has a development history just like Duke Nukem Forever.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:23 am

Muy bien; the game is released in 2017 and would have been the best game of all time, hadn't it been for the fact that no-one could play it since none of the platforms it was developed for are in use anymore.

I wish they have ladders and climbable ropes etc. in the next game (whose animations don't look like [censored])

» Fri Feb 18, 2011 11:41 pm

Muy bien; the game is released in 2017 and would have been the best game of all time, hadn't it been for the fact that no-one could play it since none of the platforms it was developed for are in use anymore.

I wish they have ladders and climbable ropes etc. in the next game (whose animations don't look like [censored])

Granted, but there is no climb skill and you always have a 99% chance to fall and brake your leg.

I wish to be able to adjust your body in character creation. Like height, muscles, fat, etc. So every npc isn't super buff absmaster 5000.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 3:49 am

Granted, but you can't throw them. They qualify as a blade weapon, and have less range than your actual fists.

I wish that Elder Scrolls V has a development history just like Duke Nukem Forever.

OMG hahahah

good one.....

as for the last wish
@outlander I wish to be able to adjust your body in character creation. Like height, muscles, fat, etc. So every npc isn't super buff absmaster 5000.

Granted BUT ...... there are so much details its almost impossible to make your character look normal, and all the preset options look like the elephant man

, it will take almost 12 hours and amazing artistic skills to create a character that looks good.

I wish we get awesome finishing moves (critical melee hits) and amazing archery (fast deadly arrows)

» Fri Feb 18, 2011 11:35 pm

Granted, but the five jobs available are "horse dung collector", "punching bag", catamite, "flower girl" for the FF7 fans, and "Imperial Lackey".

I wish TES V would make the majority of game mechanics script events so we can mod those easier.

Granted, but the game won't come packaged with modder's tools.

I wish for Argonians and Khajiit to be more than novelty races, and take a more prominent role in Tamriel.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 11:28 am

Granted, but the game won't come packaged with modder's tools.

I wish for Argonians and Khajiit to be more than novelty races, and take a more prominent role in Tamriel.

granted, they are now the food for every other race

I wish nothing would go wrong when TESV comes out

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 5:36 am

granted, they are now the food for every other race

I wish nothing would go wrong when TESV comes out

granted, everything goes wrong a few minute after it goes out.

I wish that there were more of these threads.

» Sat Feb 19, 2011 6:29 am

granted, everything goes wrong a few minute after it goes out.

I wish that there were more of these threads.

Granted, but Bethesda's employees read them and die of laughter, making TESV postponed indefinitely.

I wish the soundtrack of the next game is the best ever.