The Enclave Strikes Back

Post » Fri May 27, 2011 3:49 am

I was quite angry not being able to join the enclave, so if Bethesda won't use their imagination I will use mine.

The Enlcave Strikes Back...?The Fall of the Brotherhood
?
It was one of the biggest losses the enclave had ever faced. Their mobile land cruiser was destroyed, it was a marvel of the wasteland, envyed by all who gazed upon its glory, now reduced to a pile of rubble by the dreaded Brotherhood. Word had spread to enclave camps of this loss. The soldiers were furious, just itching to get some much needed revenge. Enclave officers recieved orders of high priority to gather all remaining soldiers for an urgent meeting.?

With haste the enclave gathered in hamiltons hideout and recieved new orders. They were ordered to lanch a full blown assault on the citadel at dawn, when the brotherhood would least expect it. The enclave commander spoke, "The brotherhood took something from us that cannot be replaced. Now we will take from them what cannot be replaced. Tommorow we attack at dawn. We will kill every last brotherhood member and burn the citadel to the ground!"

Cheers erupted throughout the cave. The soldiers were ready to fight. Each enclave soldier was outfitted with the latest weaponry and armour. "Sleep well tonight, tommorow, the citadel will burn." Spoke the commander. And so they slept, eager to finally get the revenge theyve been waiting for.

Dusk came and the enclave marched toward the citadel. There were hundreds of them. As the citadel came to view the crowd of enclave started to gain speed, all of them running toward the citadel. "This is it men, let's show them what were made of!" The Commander spoke. There were a few guards at the doors that were vaporized by plasma fire. The enclave burst through the doors...

To be continued...

Well? Is there potential here? Let me know what you guys think.?
?
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LuBiE LoU
 
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Post » Fri May 27, 2011 3:44 am

The potential is very good.

You do justice to all of us enclave fans who were forced to vaporize our own kin because Bethesda lacked a little imagination.


Thats why I tossed out my pre-war mod to make way for the Enclave Operation Hardliner mod. Check it out when its done.

9/10

Keep up.
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Stacy Hope
 
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Post » Fri May 27, 2011 8:56 am

Yeah, it has potential. Just be more descriptive. Like more dialogue, and more detail of what is going on.

I'll keep an eye on this, and continue to read the following chapters.

But, it's very good. So I hope my criticism wasn't taken the wrong way.
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Franko AlVarado
 
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Post » Thu May 26, 2011 8:01 pm

What both of the others said, it has potential and I'm glad someone is going to do this. I'm doing something similar in my own Story, as the Brotherhood were killed... Now, all the important people are dead, except for the Enclave... :lmao:
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Vicky Keeler
 
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Post » Thu May 26, 2011 11:52 pm

Yes. It's very good. 9/10.

Although, the 'attack at dawn' thing seemed a little stale, andthey didn't have a plan. The Enclave always has complex plans and ideas, but in this they just sent all their remaining troops in a giant group towards a hub overflowing with their enemies. For all we know, they have fatmen AND they have tesla cannons, so this would be a piece of cake. Expecialli the tesla cannon, it would take out AT LEAST four at a time.
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sally R
 
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Post » Thu May 26, 2011 9:03 pm

What both of the others said, it has potential and I'm glad someone is going to do this. I'm doing something similar in my own Story, as the Brotherhood were killed... Now, all the important people are dead, except for the Enclave... :lmao:


Liar, you said you were assembling a mutant frank hoorigan from shot off body parts!!!

Did you bandon us? :nope:
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Yung Prince
 
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Post » Fri May 27, 2011 5:46 am

Liar, you said you were assembling a mutant frank hoorigan from shot off body parts!!!

Did you bandon us? :nope:


Nahh, I'm doing that with someone else. Jeezuz.

-Andy
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Loane
 
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Post » Fri May 27, 2011 2:37 am

I'm glad you guys like it. if this was in the game the level cap could easily be raised to 50 and it would add a more fullfilling experience I think
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x a million...
 
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