the giant spider returns again : The Elder Scrolls Series Discussion

» Thu May 03, 2012 5:34 pm

do a backflip back into the cave.....

» Thu May 03, 2012 7:26 pm

As you fall into the cave, you pull down your pants to the ground and reveal your sharp pointed spear, you then prepare to..

» Fri May 04, 2012 2:00 am

As you fall into the cave, you pull down your pants to the ground and reveal your sharp pointed spear, you then prepare to..

..do battle, flinching with every step, all the while reminding yourself to never hide your spear down your pants again. Then...

» Thu May 03, 2012 10:59 pm

you run at the spider and throw the spear as hard as you can at one of its eyes but before it hits it

» Thu May 03, 2012 12:43 pm

...But then there's like all this pie...

» Thu May 03, 2012 10:31 pm

OOC: It wasn't a throwing spear...it was the spear from the "Lusty Argonian maid".

You grab a few pies and you decide to run, upon reaching the end of the tunne, you realize it is a dead end. You..

» Thu May 03, 2012 3:37 pm

You frantically look for an exit. A small crevice looks promising. You run up only to be face to face with Maiq The Liar who proclaims...

» Thu May 03, 2012 3:32 pm

...that not all spears are for throwing, and with a wink and a nudge, tells you to go find those women who ran off. You say...

» Fri May 04, 2012 2:01 am

Stupid kitty, spears are for Vivec's use! Muatra away...as you sore higher on your Muatra you realize that the tip is...

» Thu May 03, 2012 5:39 pm

...made of like all this pie...

» Thu May 03, 2012 2:35 pm

...and ask the pretty women if they would like a taste of some of your delicious pastry, when you suddenly realize...

» Thu May 03, 2012 3:21 pm

That you spilled the pastry all over the ground, you tell them to bend over to polish your spear when you see that...

» Thu May 03, 2012 10:35 pm

...She's actually like made of like pie...

» Thu May 03, 2012 4:15 pm

And is delicious. You then realize that the whole time you were surrounded by...

» Thu May 03, 2012 7:19 pm

... a sitcom audience. When you look at them they go "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Is5XrsRH4c" and...

» Fri May 04, 2012 1:52 am

...all 100 of them suddenly get up and surge towards you, resulting in...

» Thu May 03, 2012 6:14 pm

...all 100 of them suddenly get up and surge towards you, resulting in...

the air pressure around you building so rapidly that [science jargon] [science jargon] instant [science jargon] wormhole [science jargon] and you end up in...

Edit.

Anyone with any science know-how, please don't hate me for that completely flawed post. :tongue:

» Thu May 03, 2012 9:25 pm

...this place with like all this pie...

» Thu May 03, 2012 1:08 pm

...you realize you are in a bakery. Stepping outside, you find yourself in the province of...

» Fri May 04, 2012 2:38 am

Nothingness, where you are endless floating through, well nothingness, until...

(If Not Provided is involved here, it will be pie)

» Thu May 03, 2012 8:19 pm

...Until you suddenly float above the Imperial City, being ransacked by Dark Jedi...

(HA!)

» Thu May 03, 2012 8:33 pm

You slowly begin to float down ontop of White Gold Tower, only the palace turns out to be a giant slice of pie, which...

(Ha! Looks like the fish is on the other stick now, huh?)

» Thu May 03, 2012 3:47 pm

...Which is actually a giant man-eating slice of pie; it charges forward, swallowing Tommy Bozzer whole and slowly digesting him Sarlaac style...

(Take that!)

» Thu May 03, 2012 1:17 pm

Thankfully a sudden wind drags you away from the lethal pie and you drift off westward. You crash to the ground in the middle of Weye, and as you get on your feet and dust yourself off you hear someone behind you shout...

» Thu May 03, 2012 11:46 am

"Get off my lawn!" Just before you get hit in the head with a shovel. Next thing you know, you're all tied up, naked in a basemant, covered in pie.