In response to a post I read in another topic, I thought I'd kick this off to see if it would fly. We shall find out.

If you have any little niggles, big niggles, or any size niggle, or if you want to know how to catch yourself someone to cause niggles, post it here and lets see if we can help!

Please, though, I did a quick forum search and relationship threads have occasionally got nasty. Lets not have that happen here. Don't belittle anyone, don't make them feel stupid for asking a question, no flaming, and do not post anything that is in bad taste, illegal in your country, disturbing or otherwise unpleasant for forum members, or breaks any kind of forum rule! it would be nice if this can be a place where people can post any kind of (within reason) relationship problem and receive friendly and helpful advice.
Oh, and feel free to post about friend troubles as well. They're relationships too!

Remember- be nice

I was TOTALLY waiting for this to be made ahaha.

Guess i'll ask something small. What idea's do you guys have for keeping a long distance relationship going? My lady recently moved 2 hours away for college.

Right now, and for the next while in the forseeable future, me and my lady are (in good weather) a 2 hour drive away from eachother. With college//work, we plan to try to see each other every weekend.
Obviously, this won't always be the case, due to studying, exams, extra shifts, etc.

So i'm wondering if anyones got some good tips on how to make the time feel shorter, or anything we could do to just lessen the blow of thinking "Jesus... 2 weeks til I can even just cuddle with you."


EDIT: I should add, this is a forum which is I think 13+ or something. So I think anything leading to more racy relationship topics should be avoided to. Most people kind of forget this.

I think I found out everything in my "how exactly do you JAHO" thread, I made a few weeks ago

But yes how do you keep long distance relationships?

Had to do it

That's a rather tough one. Two hours isn't a hellishly long drive, so that's rather lucky. The advice I'd give, whether it's good or not I don't know, is not to text her every two minutes saying I miss you! You might already know that, but it can get tiresome hearing it a few times a day and the novelty wears off pretty quick. Other than that, maybe you could meet up somewhere for the day midweek, like wednesday or something if she has enough time between classes or a day off or something. Obviously this may be difficult with the cost of fuel now and all that, and I'm assuming you both have transport.
Also, webcam/skype is a lifesaver in these situations. Get creative and organise skype dates where you both do the same thing, say, for want of a more creative example, have a glass of wine. I know, I know that was terrible, but you get my drift.
Try and keep it light hearted, and not too focussed on the 'being apart.' Use the opportunity to remember what exactly it is you love about her, the small things that maybe you don't notice as much when she's around, and just let her know every now and then. It helps keep the love strong, heh.

It is damned hard though.



That was a prettydarn good thread. This one can go a little broader though, hopefully XD

When your lady friend suffers from period pains/cramping, learn how to massage her lower back to make her feel better.
When sitting with your lady friend, flip her legs onto your lap. Look into her eyes and listen to her when she speaks. If you want to be sneaky, you can run your fingers up and down the back of her calves, thighs. Also, foot massage is possible from this position.
Bring Scorched almonds.

Never let them use their epilator on you.

Scorched macadamias will also work a treat.
I would recommend following this advice just make sure the lady friend also doesn't mind foot massages. I hate feet, so foot massages for me are a no-no.

Epilators have wicked souls... :verymad:

Long distance relationships are doable. Just try not to dwell on the part about not being able to be together for long periods of time, it can lead to frustration and ultimately arguements and break up. It's better to use the time apart to bring you both closer together, learning more about each other and trying harder to maintain a connection. This is me speaking from experience, i had a 9 month relationship with a girl who lived in oxford (I'm from manchester) not so long ago. It eventually ended, but on good terms.

About long distance relationships, in most cases I'd say don't bother with them (unless you already were in a serious relationships before moving away of course). However, I don't consider two hours long distance, so you're good. If you see each other every other weekend that should be enough to keep things going fine, it's not like you won't see each other for six months.

@personworm, legendary I know
I'm gonna stop spamming now

Moderator: Good advice to take. :stare:

Well I don't really have any relationship problems at the moment but i have a question
I wonder if any of you guys/girls trust any typologies like MBTI or Socionics. Maybe you've even tried using them to find friends, girlfriends or boyfriends? How did that work out? :biggrin:

On the subject of long distance relationships, 3 things are needed for them to succeed.

1. Tangible gifts sent to her on a regular basis. She needs to have something she can touch when she's thinking of you and you aren't there. Otherwise depression will set in.

2. Skype (or your webcam chat method of choice). Facebook pictures don't cut it. Neither do phone calls really. In addition to hearing your voice, she needs to be able to see your face on a regular basis. This will keep you fresh in her mind (it's easier to forget someone you havn't seen in person in months).

3. Most importantly, you have to be doing something that she can be proud of while you're away. The biggest reason long distance relationships fail is because other guys talk to her. Guys are douchebags. Especially the ones that are still at home working pointless jobs while you're away at school. work, or whatever your reason for being gone is. They will talk you down behind your back. She needs a firm reason to be with you (besides "I wub him soooo much!") that she can cling to when guys are laying their best lines on her.

1. Not needed. She's with you for you, not the gifts you send her. If she's with you for the gifts you send her, then get rid pronto.

2. Not essential, but it does help.

3. No. You need a girl who isn't so easily sweet-talked.


The most important thing is an envisagable point in the future where you can be together on a permanent basis.


Take this from someone who has been in a long distance relationship (the same one, at that!) for five years. First over 550 miles, now a paltry 130 miles.

I have been with the same woman since 1977 and I will give my perspective:

1. Don't cheat. If you do, don't ever do it again.
2. Don't talk bad about her friends.
3. Don't be so darned needy.
4. Work hard.
5. Give a woman her space.
6. Claim your own space.
7. Buy her nice things.
8. Learn to shut up.
9. Have patience.
10. Forgive and don't bring it up again.
11. Don't get in deep debt selfishly, she'll do that for you....maybe, but hopefully not. ;o)-)

There's more and hopefully you can figure it out, but you will never be able to figure her completely out.

I have failed at all of these at different times, I'm still learning, but I have one awesome woman, also.....BTW. That helps a whole lot.

My soulmate lives in greece and I live in the US. Out of the two of us, Im the one that's depressed that we're so far apart. But we have plans to live together when she moves to the states, and im visiting her sometime this year. It's a bit of a long story...but I dont worry about other guys snatching her away.

We keep the love strong through various methods. And we voice chat on skype(cant video chat because..it's complicating..but her parents would flip out).

Anyway... I found her by being myself. It's a long story which I'll post later..

Current girlfriend, who I have been with for 1 year on Friday, and I have a bunch of issues but the largest is one of her lifestayle choices that I cannot accept and it upsets me everytime it comes up leading to a huge fight. neither of us can or want to compromise so it is going to cause us to break up. Suggestions on what we should do? It has been talked about numerous times with no positive result, but unfortunately if she keeps it up then things will be over, nto that it affects me directly but I am against it that much.

Are these choices harmful to her or those around her or what?

Here's a pretty general one, this only recently became a problem for me, being legal and all lol. Anyways, how do you ease the awkwardness of meeting someone at the bar and then calling/texting to meet up later? When I meet someone in class or somewhere sober its not bad because you gradually get to know them, but for some reason meeting someone at the bar or drunk and calling later is just weird.

Women! *throws hands in air and stomps off*

@All the replies for my question::::::::::

Ya, we try to skype 4-5 times a week, and we usually only tell eachother we miss eachother if one of us is having a hard day. We just try to cheer eachother up, and it seems that hearing this (for both of us) puts a smile on our faces and makes our night a bit better.

The only REAL issue I think i'm running into is, she is very social. So not seeing me for that much time, I know is more difficult for her, then it is for me. We actually just had a talk about how hard it's getting, because life itself is getting stressful, and I know she's starting to feel the effects of it. She's dealing with having to find a new place to live while she applies for college that is VERY close to the start of the semester. IF she doesn't get accepted for this semester, she needs to try to find a job. I also just learned my college royally screwed me and now I can't attend, so I have to find a job, really fast, and try to manage. For her (not so much for me, Im just used to handling bad situations), this is all piling up on her. She does seem worried about the relationship, and although we are crazy about eachother, it's not fair for me to see her struggling with it, when I can't properly emotionally or physically support her when she needs it. We did talk though, and we are getting through it, going to see how it all pan's out in the next couple weeks, when all this stuff calms down and gets into a routine. She was also concerned about if I will have time to see her, due to a full time job. But I told her i'm looking at jobs with open weekends (such as Security), and I'll do everything to make sure I can visit her as often as possible, so the reassurance helped.

I'm still at a loss however. But I suppose now that I think about it, there is really nothing I can do except hope she is willing to work through it all. She said she loves our relationship, but hates the circumstances it's under. Time to pray things work out for the best!





I follow most of those, and i'm going to start with the others. We both claim our space, and she LOVES how i'm the first guy that will say "[censored] you" or "No" to certain things. The "[censored] you" is all in fun however.

I learned 10 myself... I think.. or I keep learning it.. I kepe bringing something up and it always leads back to the same thing.

Learn to shutup is vital.

I have not used it for anything, but even the MBTI generalizes so I would not trust it completely. Reason being it works off percentages. I look at them like a hindsight meter.


You are looking at that from the wrong perspective.

As was said, are they harmful choices?
This sounds rather difficult. It sounds to me that if neither of you are actually willing to compromise, perhaps you need to consider breaking up, but that is only if what she does is really harmful, say, hard drugs, constant drinking, or something like that. The thing is, you have tried to talk to her about it.
When you bring it up, how do you do it? Are you both in a bad mood when it happens, and are you, say, in the house or something? Timing is essential. If your GF isn't willing to make even a small change for you, then you may need to think about ending it.
On the OTHER hand, if what she is doing is not harmful to herself or anyone else, and if it is not serious and is something she is just having fun with, then perhaps you need to think about whether or not it should be you that learns to accept and compromise. Maybe she won't because she feels ike you're being too controlling and she is retaliating. If, as you say, you are against what she does as that strongly, why did you consider a relationship in the first place? Having extremely immovable views like that doesn't lead to a healthy relationship. Say, for example, someone couldn't accept me being vegetarian. I'd tell them to shove it because no way would that work.

I think that's the most important thing in a relationship.
And not being whiney or needy.

Awww, come on, epilators don't hurt that much.
Men....*throws hands in air and walks off*

Care to elaborate?


That thing scares the living daylights outta me.

I use one on my face. Works pretty well, beats shaving, depilating, waxing, sugaring, and anti hair lotion treatment.