[Dawn Farrell]

The purpose of this thread is the following;
you name one thing you (or others) do not like about an unmodded Skyrim and try to imagine how M'aiq the Liar would respond to the complaint.

In case you do not know who M'aiq the Liar is: M'aiq is a Khajiit dressed in monk robes who wanders the land.
When the player talks to M'aiq, the Khajiit delivers a cryptic statement,
which is actually a response of the creators towards complaints of the fans and references to some other things the creators like to say.
More info can be found on http://elderscrolls.wikia.com/wiki/M%27aiq_the_Liar

Here is my first go at it:
Complaint: Skyrim feels sparsely populated and a bit empty.

M'aiq's response: "M'aiq likes Skyrim for its small amount of people. Less people means more space for M'aiq. Also more food for him."

[Sherry Speakman]

complaint: the guards talk a lot about the same stuff (arrow to the knee)

m'aiq: The people in skyrim are very like minded...well except for m'aiq.

[Fam Mughal]

Complaint: My mouse feels sluggish and laggy.

M'aiq: M'aiq don't like to drink mead before traveling in Skyrim. Mead makes M'aiq feel dizzy.

[teeny]

Complaint : The game is impossible to play after 60 hours due to badly programmed code causing lagg:

M'aiq : M'aiq doesnt know why anyone would want to stay in skyrim for so long, it is cold. M'aiq hears cyrodill is wonderful this time of year.

[Danel]

Complain: I created only one jack-of-all-trades character, powerleveled him/her to 100 in every skill and I feel like I'm done with this game.

M'aiq: M"aiq doesn't like to do the same thing for too long. M'aqi likes to try different things. This way M'aiq doesn't get bored.

[Max Van Morrison]

Complaint: There are some annoying bugs in the game.

M'aiq: "Bugs in Skyrim? M'aiq sees many bugs. Butterflies, fireflies and even spiders as big as M'aiq."

[TWITTER.COM]

M'aiq is real, seen him near riverwood... Forgot his quotes though

[Lucie H]

Complaint: "GAME B [censored]! CRASHES ALL LE TIME!!! Y U NO MAKE IT WORK?!!?" *written in [censored]*


M'aiq: "M'aiq does not understand your plea. M'aiq thinks you need to learn the way of the Khajiit."

[Poetic Vice]

There are backwards-flying dragons in my game!
"M'aiq is all too familiar with the effects of excessive inhalation of skooma. M'aiq has learned to take everything in moderation."

[Peetay]

Complaint: There are some annoying bugs in the game.

M'aiq: "Bugs in Skyrim? M'aiq sees many bugs. Butterflies, fireflies and even spiders as big as M'aiq."

I know this is nitpicking to extreme levels but spiders are not bugs

[Horror- Puppe]

Complaint: I've accidently levelled Smithing to 100 and accidently made daedric armour, just by making iron daggers

M'aiq: M'aiq had an iron dagger. It is an ugly thing. Why would M'aiq want hundreds more?

---------

Complaint: Dragons appear too often, and far too easy to kill

M'aiq: M'aiq chased a rabbit once. To make rabbit stew. The rabbit took me to many more rabbits, and M'aiq is now sick of rabbit stew.


--------

Complaint: Destruction is so underpowered!

M'aiq: M'aiq does not stare at dirt, the mountains are far more pretty, but yet.. still made out of dirt.

[Monika]

M'aiq does not understand; if one does not like to hear the complaints of others, why would they add their voice to the choir? M'aiq finds this hypocrisy amusing, but is also baffled by it.

[Josephine Gowing]

I know this is nitpicking to extreme levels but spiders are not bugs

Its exactly something I would say myself if others are calling spiders bugs. But since I was acting as M'aiq, I had all right to not make sense :tongue:

___

Complaint: The short guild questlines

M'aiq: "M'aiq likes to accomplish things really fast. So why does one want slow accomplishments. M'aiq is confused."

[Dj Matty P]

Inability to smith arrows:

"M'aiq does not understand. Smith one sword and it will last forever. Why smith an arrow which will not?"

Companion pathing issues:

"M'aiq once jumped from a high place. M'aiq's paw was sore for a week. Far better to go around. More scenic too!"

[Alycia Leann grace]

There are many trolls on the forums ...
"Trolls speak? This is news to M'aiq! M'aiq believes in freedom of one's speech but just because one can speak it does not mean that one should, especially nasty trolls. M'aiq suggests a flurry of fire spells to keep the trolls away."

The game could use multi-threaded optimisations ...
"M'aiq only knows this ... M'aiq's robe has lots of threads yet they make but one robe. It fits comfortably and keeps M'aiq warm. Why would M'aiq need to improve upon this?"

I keep crashing to desktop ...
"M'aiq thinks that cutting down on ale and mead will stop one's head hitting the desk when one has drunk too much."

[m Gardner]

Complaint: Companions should not be immortal

M'aiq: M'aiq likes his friends. Can't understand how one would want to see their friends dead.

[sunny lovett]

"M'aiq does not understand what is so impressive about shouting. M'aiq can shout whenever he wants." - Sooo love that one. :thumbsup:

Complaint: Kahjiit caravans not allowed in the city. But player kahjiit are.

M'aiq: M'aiq's friends can't get in to city, but M'aiq can. M'aiq can not say why, maybe guards thinks M'aiq is dog?

[Strawberry]

"M'aiq does not understand what is so impressive about shouting. M'aiq can shout whenever he wants." - Sooo love that one. :thumbsup:

Complaint: Kahjiit caravans not allowed in the city. But player kahjiit are.

M'aiq: M'aiq's friends can't get in to city, but M'aiq can. M'aiq can not say why, maybe guards thinks M'aiq is dog?

:D
love it!

[Charlie Sarson]

:D
love it!

I feel very proud over my self.

[carla]

]removed[

[Stay-C]

Complaint: Texture issue.

M'aiq: M'aiq has eyes, and yes they do see. But M'aiq never stares so close at things.

[Lynne Hinton]

Complaint: Level Scaling
M'aiq: When M'aiq gets powerful, others get powerful too. M'aiq thinks this is logical. Bandits, guards and even bears train their skills.

Complaint: Snow texture on structures look awful. It's looks like it's simply painted to white in MS Paint.
M'aiq: M'aiq thinks color of snow must be white. When snow falls on the floor, floor should be white too. M'aiq never understands why people react to this.

Complaint: Easy to get money. Fast travel. Crafting skills are full of exploits. And all the people who always say "players should stop themselves from abusing the exploits"
M'aiq: M'aiq finds the limitations people put on themselves stupid. Why not allow yourself to be powerful? M'aiq wonders. M'aiq thinks Skyrim isn't for the weak.

[TASTY TRACY]

Nice to see people like this game. One note though: M'aiq's response is always a snark against the complainer, not a remark that confirms it.

Complaint: Character face generation is limited compared to Oblivion. An example is that you cannot give your character strange hair colorings. (blue, green, purple etc)

M'aiq: "M'aiq thinks Skyrim's adventurers look more modest compared to Cyrodiillic ones. He has yet to see adventurers with green hair."

[Rozlyn Robinson]

No more?

[Maria Leon]

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