Someone you just beat up at an inn:"Ah, my favorite drinking buddy! Let's get some mead!" [censored] logic.


"No lollygaging." I'll lollygag whenever the [censored] I want.

And this is why, when my main quest line bugged out into non-existence and thus non-continuation, I made a seperate save and went a-murderin'.

Sorry, guards and citizens. Only Essentials had any chance (and gods DAMN there are a lot of them! >_< ) Just try fighting the monster in full Daedric armour. I DARES ya...

"So you do...what, serve the mead?"
"No...I serve the PAIN! THIS PAIN!!!" *stabs repeatedly*

Yes, I've noticed this too! Absolutely love that guy! And I bet he has a lot of customers only because of his adorable kitten face! :3333

...Anyway... It's strange how many guards were once adventurers like you or me. Then they got arrow to their knee...

No-one still beats those Whiterun people. Nazeem with his cloud district comment... Once, at night, after playing too much Skyrim, I actually watched http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yx-O97w_-hY about ten times and laughed hysterically... :I

Not to speak of that godcensored Heimskr with his Talos ecstacy! GAAAAAAAARGH! >____<

Repeated, sometimes bizarre dialogue is such a staple of RPGs I barely notice by this point.

The only one I have an irrational hatred for is mister "When I hold my daughter in my arms" in Whiterun. I don't know why, but I just get the urge to clobber him.

Haha, top comment on that video is ''Now he's in cloud? district'' :rofl:

Hhahah I actually killed him.Then the guards came and I just said I'm the thane.Then I proceed to take the snob's clothes off and put him on top of that well in the market district,naked.

EDIT:Oh and then I put a bucket on his head.And threw all the vegetables at his face.

I can't believe that the what I thought was a helmet on the guards around villages and towns are not helmets at all, they are infact their faces. They are all brothers, but only one of them is lucky enough to be "off fighting dragons".


Wait.... I'm the only one I know of who is actively fighting dragons?...... does that mean.... are they trying to say?.... *Luke Skywalker voice*.... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooo!

this is off topic but i hate it when i fast travel to a town and the entire populace is playing follow the leader.

"I'm sworn to carry your burdens.."

I'M TRYING TO GIVE YOU A FULL SET OF EBONY ARMOR, [censored].

Also, people are saying this game is 30% done because they want LESS random dialogue? Huh..backwards.

Have you tried mercenary work? It might suit you.

The general shop in Falkreath is pretty bad as well when you just want to do some shopping. Upon entering one of the brothers says "Can't believe we allow provincials like you to wander Skyrim." The other brother gives his standard 'my brother is a racist, but I'm not speech' when you talk to him. As soon as you're done selling stuff and want to head for the door, he says "Steal something from my shop and you'll regret it". When you head outside, the other brother has also exited the building and says the exact same thing as when you entered.

The above sequence happens each and every time I've entered that building.

Better yet, there is a companion you can get who is a priest, but every time I heal him, he responds with, "I hope you aren't expecting a 'thank you'." :facepalm:

Funny.. that happened in my Whiterun as well. :batman:

DooooOOOOooooo CoooOOOOooome back!

Not if you're going to be creepy, dude!

"I'm an apprentice wizard not a pack mule. fine, but make it quick"

I killed that cocky little [censored] and yes I made it quick!

people were always so charmed by the constant mindless babble of mudcrabs in oblivion... yet now everything in skyrim is annoying you guys?

is it because mudcrabs are actually tough, atleast compared to the past ones... and no one is talking about how horrible they are?

why dont you make annoying jokes out of the things you're hearing the people in skyrim say all the time? :rolleyes:

Let me guess, someone stole your sweetroll?

"So what are you in jail for?"
"Murder, banditry, theft, lollygagging"

Best punchline in the game.

:rofl: now he's IN Cloud District :rofl:

It's awesome how he could get the critical attack to work like that. Very funny :rofl:

I'm so glad to have the claw back where it belongs.
I'm so glad to have the claw back where it belongs.
I'm so glad to have the claw back where it belongs.
I'm so glad to have the claw back where it belongs.

GAAAAH why did I marry her!?! She doesn't even make sandwiches!

Is there something you want my thane?
Is there something you want my thane?
Is there something you want my thane?

- Yes, for you to shut up and sit in the corner like a good girl.

Hello my love, back from some adventure I suppose?
Hello my love, back from some adventure I suppose?
Hello my love, back from some adventure I suppose?
Hello my love, back from some adventure I suppose?

- No, I've just spent an hour in the basemant making potions, what the van helsing woman!?

PS. Bethesda needs to add sandwiches to the cooking-part of the game. DS

I have to wonder why on earth they felt it was a good design decision to make the game dialogue endlessly infuriating... again. Either they need to make mods available for consoles or I'm getting an extra long hdmi cable so I can play from the PC in the living room.

Dude, nothing beats Mjoll.

"My mother was a strong woman, she even taught me how to use the sword. Can you imagine?"
"My father wanted me to be a hunter, but I set my aspirations a bit higher. He never complained..... (she really pauses and I am so [censored]in annoyed by it) I miss him."

Bloody hell, I know since you told me a hundred times! Dammit, why does she have to be so capable as a tank and look so freakishly hot...

I don't call him captain like the townsfolk do, I call him major. Major Annoyance. There's also General Idiocy, Private Thoughts Are Leaking Out Of My Head, Corporal Keeps Punishing Me, Captain Oblivious and Super Intergalactic Space President [censored]. But there is no captain.

Love the cat face, and the arrow in the knee story!



Everytime I leave his shop I'm thinking that I'll never go back to that sarcastic bum, but whenever I need to sell some pricey potions after the hag next door ran out of money he is the man for the job.




Oh and I have heard so many of the comments that you guys in this thread typed and I have heard them so many times that I even can correct them, even if it is with only a small word.. Fml. :spotted owl:

From time to time one gets so mad at some characters that you wish you could throw them in a well. But that is something I'm going to do the second time around when I start my other character. He is going to be in the dark brotherhood, killing annoying people without contracts or coins.

Among the first to fall:
Every Npc that switches between voice actors between lines or sound too much out of character. *looks at certain elves in the Bards collage* :violin:
Whiteruns court wizard - "..like the rest of the great warriors." :swear:
About every shop keeper in Whiterun, for various reasons. :banghead:
Any Nord character that sounds too full of himself or sounds like he is trying to swallow his own beard while talking to me. :flame:
Last but not least I will take the Executioners Hood from the Dark Brotherhood quest line, reverse pickpocket it into Sven's inventory and then make him follow me to the Throat of the World where I will mercilessly beat him to a bloody pulp with my war hammer. Why? Not because I hate his guts, but to set an example to the rest of the asshats around Skyrim to back the Talos off! :chaos:

This is the part where you fall down and bleed to death!